Page 9 | Child spoiling holiday

Carrie76 · 2023-02-08T08:02:10+00:00

We’re currently on a ski holiday, first time for the kids. Child no 2 is refusing to go to ski school, he thinks it’s boring. The other 2 would rather ski with parents too but they’re okay to do it. I’m currently sitting in the apt with the middle one as if he’s not doing ski school he’s not going skiing. He’s very headstrong and I don’t think he should get his way. I’m now resenting the fact that I’ve to sit here for 2.5 hrs until the lesson is over. Do I then let him ski in the afternoon??

Inyournewdress · 08/02/2023 10:44

Yes, he’s arrogant and he’s wrong…after three mornings he has a lot to learn. If he was nervous to ski I would say you should accommodate that as he shouldn’t be forced to do it. But that’s not what’s happening. I would see if there is a different class that suits him but even if not, I would say that if you want to ski you go to the class and that’s it.

budgiegirl · 08/02/2023 10:47

Common sense says take them to swimming lessons before the beach and skiing lessons before the holiday

It's perfectly normal to learn to ski on a skiing holiday rather than before. Pre-holiday lessons can be helpful, but it's not the same as skiing on snow. Lessons in a ski resort are far more helpful, and really help to make the most of a weeks skiing holiday. Lessons in the morning and free skiing in the afternoon sounds ideal.

EL8888 · 08/02/2023 10:48

strawberry2017 · 08/02/2023 08:36

No class no skiing.
You are the parent. Don't give him the choice.

This. Good on OP for putting her foot down. For his own safety and other people’s safety he needs to have lessons. Its the responsible thing to do. So what if he’s 10 and a know it all

LuckySantangelo35 · 08/02/2023 10:49

You go to ski school or you don’t ski

simple

end of matter

LIZS · 08/02/2023 10:52

Take him along to meet the others at collection time, the instructors are usually good about talking about plans for next session and his siblings will probably be full of what they have done without him.

JudgeRudy · 08/02/2023 10:54

Merlott · 08/02/2023 08:04

Age of child?

YABU to say a child is "ruining" a holiday. You're the parent, you set the expectations.

No need to sit in the apartment. Take child out to do something else. If they whinge about that/don't want to then ski school it is!

I disagree. She's not saying she wishes she'd never had her child as they've ruined her life....she's quite accurately saying that her child's behaviour is seriously impacting on her enjoyment. As a responsible parent who loves her child she's emotionally (and legally) over a barrel really. I can totally relate to her feeling resentful that her Limited free time and money has been wasted.

Whatafool123 · 08/02/2023 10:54

4thonthe4th · 08/02/2023 08:10

But then I wouldn't take my kids on holiday and then put them in childcare...

👌🏼 This!

Obviously skiing isn’t something he enjoys but has been dragged along anyway. Hope it isn’t his only “holiday”

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Wow! Childcare? This is a bit judgmental! If you are going to learn to ski, most people would consider that doing so with a group of other children is the most fun way to do it. It's not quite the same as just dumping your kids in a hotel kids club and buggering off to the bar/pool.

Fair enough the children may find they don't like it, as seems to be the case here, but many do and the ultimate aim is usually for the whole family to be able to ski together once everyone is at the same standard!

ChateauMargaux · 08/02/2023 10:55

Where is his Dad? Maybe a few private lessons and then skiing with his Dad might be enough for him. He might not ski perfectly and beautifully but he might have fun - it is a holiday after all. Perhaps, introduce your children to these sports and then follow their passions - if they are driven to work through the badges and work up through the slopes, as long as they can ski safely, allow them to enjoy what they are doing.

LuckySantangelo35 · 08/02/2023 10:55

@4thonthe4th

“But then I wouldn't take my kids on holiday and then put them in childcare...”

why not?

MeridianB · 08/02/2023 10:58

Can the ski teacher have a chat with him?

Along the lines of "It's great that you want to go fast, but I've see so many accidents with speedy kids who didn't take lessons. It's really important to ski right, not just fast - you will have more fun in the long run"?

LeilaGetTheHose · 08/02/2023 11:02

Buffysoldersister · 08/02/2023 08:09

How old is he? Are all the kids in the same group for ski school or is he on his own and miserable? Was the holiday and ski school discussed with the kids beforehand?

I would let him ski. But then I wouldn't take my kids on holiday and then put them in childcare...

A skiing class is not "daycare"!!!

jackstini · 08/02/2023 11:03

You need to move him up a group
No point going to lessons where he's bored and not getting any benefit

But as he does love skiing in general and agreed to go in the holiday, he should go

If he can't move groups - go skiing with him or do another activity

wheretonow123 · 08/02/2023 11:03

First World Problem

Radiatorvalves · 08/02/2023 11:04

I’m over 50, been skiing for almost 40 years and have 2 excellent (better than me) teenage skiers. We all did ski school…. And the boys enjoyed doing jumps/runs through the trees etc - things they’d never do with boring mum.

the safety aspect is huge. People have died because of out of control skiers and idiots have been arrested/sued.

how’s the conversation going OP? Most of us (the skiers anyway) are 100% with youz hope the brat has taken on board the messsges.

SafferUpNorth · 08/02/2023 11:04

LuckySantangelo35 · 08/02/2023 10:49

You go to ski school or you don’t ski

simple

end of matter

Absolutely this. With bells on. From experience.

We are a family of very keen skiers, though DH and I only learnt as adults. Our DS (14) absolutely loves it too and is very accomplished. Totally outski's us adults and also doing freestyle (jumps etc).

He started learning at ski school aged 7 and around that age (9/10) declared he knows enough, is much better than everyone else in class and doesn't want to go to ski school. I think it's a boy thing at that age.

We insisted. Explained that, even though he's a natural, there is still so much he can learn (eg jumps). And for safety it's important that he keeps improving his technique. We cannot teach him as well as the ski school. We emphasised that, if he really is too good for a particular class, he'll be moved up. And then frog-marched him off - no choice.

4thonthe4th · 08/02/2023 11:07

LuckySantangelo35 · 08/02/2023 10:55

@4thonthe4th

“But then I wouldn't take my kids on holiday and then put them in childcare...”

why not?

I don’t want to. Personal choice. I don’t go on holiday to leave my children with strangers, I go on holiday to enjoy the time with them. I’m always shocked at the amount of parents in hotels we’ve stayed in that leave very young children in kids clubs all morning and all afternoon but they’re obviously popular so maybe I’m the strange one for enjoying time with children.

SafferUpNorth · 08/02/2023 11:07

jackstini · 08/02/2023 11:03

You need to move him up a group
No point going to lessons where he's bored and not getting any benefit

But as he does love skiing in general and agreed to go in the holiday, he should go

If he can't move groups - go skiing with him or do another activity

Any reasonable ski school would move him if he is genuinely so much better than everyone else in class. My bet is that the "I'm bored, I'm not learning anything as I'm to good for the group" is preteen hormonal cockiness. Right age for it.

Fact is, it's not his decision to make.

If OP believes that her son has a point, she could have a word with the ski school.

4thonthe4th · 08/02/2023 11:09

Whatafool123 · 08/02/2023 10:54

Wow! Childcare? This is a bit judgmental! If you are going to learn to ski, most people would consider that doing so with a group of other children is the most fun way to do it. It's not quite the same as just dumping your kids in a hotel kids club and buggering off to the bar/pool.

Fair enough the children may find they don't like it, as seems to be the case here, but many do and the ultimate aim is usually for the whole family to be able to ski together once everyone is at the same standard!

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Why isn’t it the same ? Aren’t kids clubs in hotels the same thing; doing activities with a random group of other children who’ve been placed in the same club / group?

On your last point; the op has pointed out she’s not a very good skier either so not sure what their plan is.

emptythelitterbox · 08/02/2023 11:12

How old are the other kids in the group and what is their level?

If he's with a bunch of 4- 5 year olds who can barely stand up, I can understand him not wanting to keep with the lessons.

LuckySantangelo35 · 08/02/2023 11:15

4thonthe4th · 08/02/2023 11:07

I don’t want to. Personal choice. I don’t go on holiday to leave my children with strangers, I go on holiday to enjoy the time with them. I’m always shocked at the amount of parents in hotels we’ve stayed in that leave very young children in kids clubs all morning and all afternoon but they’re obviously popular so maybe I’m the strange one for enjoying time with children.

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@4thonthe4th

im sure parents whose kids go to kids club like spending time with their children too. The kids are not there 24/7 after all.

but some parents also like chilling by the pool with cocktails or whatever which a lot of kids would find boring.

So you can do both! Why miss out?! It’s a holiday for the grown ups too, not just for kids!

SafferUpNorth · 08/02/2023 11:15

4thonthe4th · 08/02/2023 11:09

Why isn’t it the same ? Aren’t kids clubs in hotels the same thing; doing activities with a random group of other children who’ve been placed in the same club / group?

On your last point; the op has pointed out she’s not a very good skier either so not sure what their plan is.

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Errrrrr no, ski school is not like kids club in a hotel. The children are learning a rahter technical skill, it's not random entertainment. Would you call going to ballet or music class simply childcare?

angelpoise · 08/02/2023 11:15

I would take him along for a chat with the ski school. A change of class could be the answer - it happens all the time so they won't be surprised that you want to discuss it.

4thonthe4th · 08/02/2023 11:17

SafferUpNorth · 08/02/2023 11:15

Errrrrr no, ski school is not like kids club in a hotel. The children are learning a rahter technical skill, it's not random entertainment. Would you call going to ballet or music class simply childcare?

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No, but then that’s not the comparison the pp tried to make, is it. It’s going on holiday and putting your child in a club whilst there.

whenwhenwhen · 08/02/2023 11:17

YANBU. He wants to ski, so he needs to learn the skills to be safe. If he refuses to do that, he cannot be permitted to ski, for his own safety and that of others.

Arewethereyet22 · 08/02/2023 11:17

So are all the adults in ski school/classes also being babysat? If ski school is really just childcare then why does it exist for
adults.