Taking a house you don’t really want?

[Balloonblower8]

I live in an awful area with violence, anti social behaviour and bad neighbours. It’s not where I want to raise my children as it’s got worse since we moved here 4 years ago. The local schools have gone downhill too and are rated some of the worse in the U.K.

I have the option to take another house half an hour away with better opportunities, it isn’t perfect and it’s fairly small, but it will mean an easy escape from this dreadful place.
If you were me would you take the house for these reasons? Have you been in this position and moved somewhere you didn’t really want just for a happier life?

It's a good point. Why are the rents so high if the area is a hellhole, anyway?

I'm sure it's London - I'd rather stick it out in London than move somewhere rents are low because there are fewer jobs etc.

I have no reasons to stay here I have been desperately looking to move for quite some time but as it’s a rubbish area no one wants the house

Either you are desperate to move or you aren't - teleporting your current house to a "naice" area isn't going to happen. If you've been looking for ages and nothing else has come up, you could wait a good while longer with no result; if your only option is a swap, as you've already recognised people wanting to move to where you are now are going to be thin on the ground - the potential 'swappers' have a logical reason for wanting to move there, to be near family.
I wouldn't be too swayed about a single crime report from a few years ago - do you have contacts or acquaintances in the potential new area you can speak to?

"the reason I’m dragging my heels is because I’m letting other people ‘win’ by leaving a house I love to move to one that isn’t great"

I absolutely know what you mean; of course they shouldn't drive you out of your home. But you have to take the pragmatic view - it will be better for you to move, and as for the idea of them=winners, you=losers, you have to let it go.

Problem is you know the devils next door where you are. Why does someone want to swap their tiny but ok area house for your big yet devils. You say they know a family across the road, so they presumably know the behaviour down the street how often the police are out etc.

any chance they are friends with the devil people wanting to get those they like into the area and you out?

I disagree. Replies like these are unkind and unhelpful.

What exactly are the issues with your current neighbourhood? Can you give some examples?

I suspect you won't be happy in the new house.

Yes. You might never get another chance. Inertia can stop you making change, but it sounds very much worth it especially if you have kids.

Why are you 'sure it's London' that the OP lives? I can't see her mention it anywhere. Just because the rent is £2000 a month for private let, that means nothing. Many places all over the UK have private rents that high. Especially for a big house that the OP seems to want.

And nobody is being an arsehole, as one charming poster said further back in the thread. People are just trying to understand why the OP said she wants to move to this better area with better opportunities, (in her first post,) and then further on in the thread, started denigrating the house and area she was originally praising ... But the OP has flounced now, as she clearly didn't want to answer the question, so it looks like we'll never know.

Thanks @HeavenIsAHalfpipe, I am charming. 👍
She's been called crazy and been accused of trying to start a bun fight among other things. That was 30 seconds of scrolling.

Posters forget there are real people behind these words (usually) and I do think some posters are awful.
It must be so stressful to have to make decisions when you're anxious and stressed. How about giving her a bit of a break?

Asking questions is fine obviously but there's ways of doing that.

I’d definitely move.

The reason they called the show “Location, Location, Location” is because when you’re considering location, size and price, it’s really all about location.

Many places all over the UK have private rents that high.

I wasn't aware that £2k a month would be a totally normal rent for a house on a council estate in a very rough area, outside of London.

So it’s a Mutual exchange? You can take time to decide. You can also back out right up til the paperwork is signed but would be unpopular!

The neighbour issue can you reapply to the housing register. Look at welfare panel to get priority banding with your mental health.

What ages are your children?

Could you go to the new place which is in a more desirable area and look on it as a short term solution and then swap for something bigger at a later date

Presumably it will be easier to swap than your last place.

I mean the place you are in now

@Balloonblower8 what specifically does this mean?

despite all the police and doctor reports they don’t care what we’ve been through

We did exactly this moved 2 hours away from last house to the country,better schools and such friendly peeps..last place hell hole..now we can go out walking, have friendly peeps to talk to love love love it best thing we did for us and our 4 kids and just 2 months after the move hubby eventually got a work transfer to the town we moved to so even better...so I defo say go for it

Surely moving from a bad area with violence is going to be thousand times better than staying where you are

What's the chances that someone with family in your horrible area, but with a perfect big house is going to come along and want to exchange with you if you turn this one down? Probably nil. Appealing to be moved, even with evidence, hasn't helped. Absolutely move! Just move for your sanity and your safety and then work out if you want to stay there for ever.

Hope it works out for you OP, must be hellish. Good luck.

You'll never know if you don't accept it. Have a walk around the area both during the day and at night. To get an idea of the neighbourhood.

Absolutely. I grew up in a similar area and moved back there as an adult with my first child. Had we stayed her catchment junior school would be the actual worst ranked primary school in the country (at the time, it's still in the bottom ten I believe along with two others in the town). As you can imagine the area is not a nice area. I absolutely would have moved purely for that if we had been able to afford it as moving back was a massive mistake. We were lucky and husband's job paid our solicitor fees for moving as otherwise we'd have never gotten out.

I live in exactly the same sort of place.

I’d move to the bloody moon to escape it.

£2k pm will get you a house in a non shitty part of London. Not Mayfair, granted, but there's no reason to pay that much for an utter hell hole.
But then op seems confused about a lot of things, so perhaps this isn't quite gospel either.

Grab it with both hands to get you and your children away from the violence and anti social behaviour and in a better school. If the area is as bad as you say you may not get the chance again for ages.

The house may not be ideal but you can make it your own, and if it is in a nicer area it will be easier to find a swap if things don’t turn out well.

Defined move.

I grew up in an area such as you describe and the relief when I moved to somewhere that wasn’t like that was quite overwhelming and liberating.

That should say definitively (darn predictive text)