To think we’ve lost sight of what a healthy child’s weight should be?

[Winniethepoohandtiggertoo]

Walking through town today as kids were leaving school and I was quite shocked by the size of them (primary kids). But then I noticed that so many of them were overweight that in a way it isn’t surprising that maybe their parents haven’t noticed or realised there is a problem? When I was little kids were skinny things, now it seems the norm for them to be built like shot-putters! I know a few parents with overweight children but they insist they’re ‘strong’ or ‘solid’, or ‘they run around so much they just burn it off’. When so many kids look like theirs it probably isn’t surprising they think that?

It's unhelpful to shame people about their weight though

No one is shaming.

Swap the word shame for 'concerned'.

It's all down the parents if the child is living at home and the parents are buying the food and putting it in front of them.

Parents need to take some responsibility.

I think it’s a bit strange that there are so few in between kids. They’re either super skinny (all ribs as described on MN). Someone asked me if my youngest had had the overweight letter from the reception weigh in! Umm no, she just has chubby cheeks and a load of muscle from hours of gymnastics a week. She’s middle of the healthy weight range and super fit. But like the competitive thinness and healthy eating on MN, there seems to be a thing where ultra thin middle class mothers are aiming for their kids to be all cheekbones and ribs at 5.

@Winniethepoohandtiggertoo I can assure you right now that my dd isn't riding round an estate with a 'can of pop'

She does a range of sports, she doesn't overeat. She's tall for her age, she's going through puberty. I imagine she will shoot up in a few years.

I hope so but what’s the harm in helping her out now? What if she doesn’t shoot up? Much easier to lose a few pounds at 11 than a few stone at 20.

My kids eat lots of snacks and decent portion sizes and they are still so skinny. They have cakes, chocolate, crisps almost everyday. But they also have lots of vegetables with their dinner and a decent breakfast which doesn't include sugary cereals. Hardly any processed meals though.
They do quite a bit of exercise though.
I don't think there's a magic answer to this, but I think it's the exercise that makes the difference. We hardly use the car and walk and cycle 99% of the time, plus they do sports clubs too. Most children we know who are driven places regularly tend to be the overweight ones.

She gave me a rule of thumb for whether a child is a healthy weight: on an undressed child you should be able to see their ribs frequently, hip bones occasionally, nasal bone never.

Nasal bone? As in the nose? Is that a typo?

SavourFlaire

nonsense. Perception has changed not sizes. Can assure you plenty of fat kids and adults around in the 70s as I was there. I assume you were not?

It may not be right to shame people who are overweight

Mostly because it just sets their mindset to ignore any healthy weight messages

But being body positive isn't helping either
In fact it's even worse than shaming as it makes people think it's ok

it is wrong to pretend that it isn't a major cause of concern , a major cause for NHS to be under stress

I agree. It isn't always an easy fix though. I have 5 dc. 4 are a healthy weight, 1 is closer to overweight (age 5.5 wearing either age 5 wide fit or normal age 6 trousers). He's asthmatic & takes long term medication that contribute to weight gain, he eats portions appropriate to his age & has a good diet, he loves being outside. His Dr & asthma nurse aren't concerned because they can see from his siblings, DH & myself that it's not 'the norm' in our family. He's actually just had an upward growth spurt so has moved back from the overweight end, ultimately though there's not a huge amount I can do. That being said he doesn't stand out as being 'big' in his class or year group in the same way my older dc do in theirs for being 'skinny'.

@LeapingCat I know a lot of mothers like this. Mothers who are actually borderline anorexic or just neurotic about food. The children follow suit and some of them look extremely ill they are so thin. One of the school mums has bulimia and her dd has started to copy her. She has panic attacks eating food and tries to be sick after eating. They've involved the GP and CAMHS.

If your child is on the 97th centimetres then 96% of children their age weigh less. It means your child is one of the heaviest. No amount of sport will make up for the fact they are fat and the fat is putting a strain on their internal organs. My dds were both shamed for being skinny but actually they are just a healthy weight at the lower end of the centiles. Fat has become normalised.

How very statistically unlikely, given how much more common it is to be overweight than ‘borderline anorexic’.

BMI is rubbish I was overweight according to my BMI but I wear a size 6.

An average adolescent boy requires 2,800 calories per day, which is 40% more than an average adult woman and 300 calories more than an average adult man (equivalent to a full extra meal per day) so I do think it is a slightly different conversation to whether a 4 year old should be eating one slice of pizza or two 😅(not that your experience of BMIs isn't relevant (and very interesting) too.)

I don’t think it’s rude, it’s unfortunately true.

BMI is better than dress size for determining healthy weight. Bangs head against brick wall

Unless you are an elite athlete bmi is pretty good
You should also use the waist size metrics which adjust for ethnicity

If both say you are overweight , suck it up

I have noticed this too! And it's not just the kids getting bigger, it's the clothes, so alot of people with overweight children think they're fine, because the clothes for their age or a size up, fit them perfectly. I struggle to find leggings that fit my girls as they're "slender" (perfect weight in my opinion, but constantly called skinny, as much thinner than the majority of their peers) most leggings just hang off them, so I have to buy two sizes smaller, and then they're too short. They're definitely not underweight though, they don't have bones sticking out, both look really well proportioned, active, and full of energy. but compared to most of their peers, they do appear much smaller.

Either way, it was fine as was my waist size. It's not really my top half that makes me the size I am in clothes, I could wear a 10 on top, but my bum/hips/thighs necessitate larger sizes on the bottom/dresses. It is hard to find clothes that fit properly. Either they fit my thighs and hips but are too big on the waist or they would fit my waist nice and snugly but I can't get them over my thighs.

I have been underweight in the past at a size 6/8 when I had an ED

Not a chance.

You’re not taking into account population distribution. Particularly at primary age, children’s average weight is strongly correlated with deprivation. If your child goes to school in a v well off area there’s a decent chance there’ll be the orthorexic mums. My DD’s school is a bit more mixed. Some overweight kids but probably more of the ultra skinny parents and kids. They’re the kids that are all over the food at parties while my average weight DD doesn’t want to stop playing to eat.

I will caveat this by saying that the horrific situation where some children are hungry because this government is not supporting the most vulnerable in society, is not what I'm alluding to.

My concern is that many people (adults and children) don't seem to be able to cope with slight hunger pangs. There is nothing wrong with feeing hungry. I hate people state they are starving - which annoys the fuck out of me. You might not have eaten for a few hours. It isn't a problem. You don't need a snack. (Diabetics and other suffers of metabolic disorders notwithstanding).

Unless there is a medical reason for their size then you look at what factors you can control and try to see where things are slipping. Obvious ones are exercise, which you say is sufficient, portion control, processed food with added sugar and fat, too little variety in foodstuffs so low gut biom, snacking with unnecessary calories, drinking sugary or calorie rich drinks , eating too late in the evening for her body to process a meal.I don’t know the answer, she is your child, but the reason is there somewhere.

Many two year olds are a bit podgy - DS definitely still had his baby tummy and fat little legs then. I don’t think that is a particular issue, they are still toddlers with a toddler body shape.

A seven or nine year old shouldn’t still have a big stomach or fat legs though.

@Winniethepoohandtiggertoo this post explains it better then I can! It's age which is a factor for my DS hence beanpole but on a BMI calculator towards the heavier end!

As said its fairly rudimentary and doesn't factor in increasing height of populations for example.
A more accurate way is to use BMI as a indicator then take waist measurements and calipers for fat.

I don't disagree that children are getting bigger btw just that tou can't use BMI calculator alone!

Try Boden leggings, they’re a much tighter fit.