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AIBU?

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Original poster

Daughters birthday and one friend is vegan

157 replies

Blueflag22 · 30/01/2023 20:45

My daughter 9 yes old wants me to order a vegan cake for her birthday party for a friend that is vegan?? I'm going to spend a fair bit on this cake and honestly I'm not vegan neither is anyone else, just one of he friends is. What do I do? buy some vegan cupcakes separately? Should that be rude?

OP posts:
Emmamoo89 · 30/01/2023 20:58

Cupcakes will be fine

TheBigWangTheory · 30/01/2023 20:58

XenoBitch · 30/01/2023 20:46

A vegan cake won't hurt the non vegans. I can guarantee they wont even notice the lack of eggs or dairy in it.

You can't guarantee shite!

Reminds me of a vegan "friend" who served up seitan and insisted to all that there was no way we could tell it wasn't steak....apparently the colour, smell, taste, consitency, texture etc all being nothing at all like steak made no difference at all.....

Folklore9074 · 30/01/2023 21:01

Just make/buy a vegan cake, so easy to include everyone this way and the non-vegans won't notice particularly if they are 9 year olds.

Rentquestion · 30/01/2023 21:01

I honestly can’t tell the difference between (well made) vegan cakes and non vegan. (I’m not vegan, but have friends who are so have had and made plenty.)

If your daughter wants a vegan cake then why not? What’s the rationale behind not doing it if it’s what your daughter wants?

But equally, a few vegan cupcakes will also be fine.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 30/01/2023 21:02

Get cupcakes for everyone?

If you are ordering from a professional baker, they should be able to do fancy, celebratory cupcakes, including vegan ones.

Shoogly · 30/01/2023 21:02

@Blueflag22 your daughter sounds like a lovely caring friend.

@neverknowinglyunreasonable An apple?! I really hope you're joking.

I'm a non vegan cake lover. It is possible to have a vagan cake that is delicious and it would be lovely to embrace your daughter's kindness.

Rentquestion · 30/01/2023 21:02

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 30/01/2023 21:02

Get cupcakes for everyone?

If you are ordering from a professional baker, they should be able to do fancy, celebratory cupcakes, including vegan ones.

That’s a great idea!

Madamecastafiore · 30/01/2023 21:03

We get DD a cake from Hummingbird Bakery and stick plastic figures on and then get cupcake for kids who have allergies do have got vegan ones for egg allergic and a different one for a celiac etc.

LabiaMinoraPissusFlapus · 30/01/2023 21:07

I've been vegan for years, and one thing I miss is a lovely cake! I do like vegan cake but there is a difference. Your guests may know, and more importantly your wallet definitely will! I'd just get a vegan cake on the side.

GreaterStickle · 30/01/2023 21:07

Stellaris22 · 30/01/2023 20:57

It's your daughter's birthday, not yours. Why are you so insistent on going against her wishes?

If you have concerns, go out and try some vegan cupcakes. Our local coffee plays only does vegan and it's delicious.

Better yet, ask someone to buy some vegan cakes and do a blind taste test with non vegan.

Why the anger at vegans?

Because they expect everyone to dance to their tune.

Nsky62 · 30/01/2023 21:11

Apart from butter icing, I wouldn’t notice the difference

onionringcheeseypuff · 30/01/2023 21:13

I ordered 6 vegan cupcakes to go around my sons last birthday cake because his friend has allergies and never feels included, it was important to us.

Previous times I've bought vegan cakes from supermarkets and decorated them with vegan sprinkles to colour match main cake

cheeseandquackerz · 30/01/2023 21:14

neverknowinglyunreasonable · 30/01/2023 20:48

People will definitely notice a vegan cake. Get separate cupcakes or an apple.

They really wouldn’t. An apple? Juvenile response.

agree with a vegan cupcake option though.

XenoBitch · 30/01/2023 21:16

catandcoffee · 30/01/2023 20:57

People truly will notice the difference 😁

Show quote history

A kid's party consisting of 9 year olds wont.

OnTheBoardwalk · 30/01/2023 21:16

You have A vegan guest coming. Everyone else will taste that it’s not a 'proper' cake

90% of the time I’m vegetarian just through choice. All the vegetarian options now being replaced by tasteless vegan options make me choose the meat options

OnTheBoardwalk · 30/01/2023 21:17

Sorry meant to say get a few vegan cupcakes

XenoBitch · 30/01/2023 21:18

OnTheBoardwalk · 30/01/2023 21:16

You have A vegan guest coming. Everyone else will taste that it’s not a 'proper' cake

90% of the time I’m vegetarian just through choice. All the vegetarian options now being replaced by tasteless vegan options make me choose the meat options

The party is going to be attended by 9 year olds. If a 9 year old can tell the difference between a cake made with egg and a cake made with flax seed or oil, then there are bigger issues at hand.

gettingalifttothestation · 30/01/2023 21:18

Morrison's do chocolate and lemon vegan cupcakes put them out with the cake

theescapeladder · 30/01/2023 21:19

Mmmmm... This brings some sweet memories! We had two proper lush multi-tiered cakes made to order for our wedding - a regular chocolate cake and a vegan piña colada one. Even though only had one truly vegan guest in our wedding party of 70.

Guess which cake was demolished faster? 💯🌱🎂🤭

Read the reviews of the bakery beforehand and have no fear!

WhereIsMyRollingPin · 30/01/2023 21:19

Your daughter is very considerate, well done her.

I only bake vegan cakes & cookies and have never had anyone refuse them. Most non-vegans are amazed and I end up writing out the recipes for them (most are in my head, not from a book).

LachrymoseLeeches · 30/01/2023 21:19

I'd get the vegan cake if she's asked for it. It's nice that she wants to include her friend.

A nice vegan cake from a bakery is better than a cheap supermarket non-vegan cake anyway. Plus, an adult might be able to tell that a cake is vegan, but a group of overexcited 9 year olds will not know or care.

OnTheBoardwalk · 30/01/2023 21:20

@XenoBitch I’m sorry but cake, good cake butter icing and all the trimmings, is good cake no matter what age you are

OnTheBoardwalk · 30/01/2023 21:21

Pina colada cake sounds good though

Wickedgreengirl · 30/01/2023 21:24

Just get some vegan cupcakes and give the friend one when you hand the cake out. My mum thinks she needs gluten free food, I’ve given up trying to cater for her and just get a few bits for her and we all eat the nice food!

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 30/01/2023 21:24

I've had this situation a couple of times. Once I bought a pack of two vegan cup cakes from the supermarket. Once I made some vegan brownies, they were really quick and easy and I just cut the recipe down so wasnt wasting loads of them.