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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nuts on school trip abroad

170 replies

Ellie09ellie · 27/01/2023 17:41

My daughter is due to go on a school trip abroad in the next week. She is 14. We have just had a message to say no buts on the coach as a child has an airborne allergy. They are also having to ask the hotel to become nut free for the duration of their stay. Is this actually possible or even reasonable given that it's a hotel? My daughter is vegetarian and a lot of her food has nuts in it. Is it unreasonable to expect that after paying quite a bit of money that she gets to eat decent food and not live of chips for a week? I get that it's an allergy that could kill but surely the parents weighed up the issues before sending their child on a trip with 50 other children to a foreign country? Has anyone else been in this position? Thank you

OP posts:
Ohdearnotagain76 · 27/01/2023 17:52

I think this should of been sorted out months ago. Regardless of if a child is vegetarian or has a allergy, surely all this info was given when you showed interest in the holiday. My DS is ASC and has serious food issues, not allergys and spent several day surviving on crisps and apples and he managed. Must just say this was my sons choice and nothing to do with the school as their were reasonable adjustments made for him but he wouldn't even try the food, even the chocolate cake incase it had been poisoned. Hopefully all those going have a wonderful time

Genehuntsfanclub · 27/01/2023 17:53

I've been a vegetarian since childhood, my daughter has a potentially fatal nut allergy. I don't eat nuts as I won't risk her safety. There's plenty of vegetarian foods without nuts do you are being unreasonable.

justadress · 27/01/2023 17:53

The child with the allergy should have the same opportunity to go on the trip as any other child.

dangbongo · 27/01/2023 17:54

Oh dear I just don't think this OP can be real. Or maybe it's a reverse? A veggie child will be perfectly fine for one week without eating nuts. A child with an allergy will absolutely not be fine if other children have nuts.
Where is the argument?!

TopBitchoftheWitches · 27/01/2023 17:54

Surely this is a load of bollocks and no one is that selfish?

Dartmoorcheffy · 27/01/2023 17:54

I've just catered an entirely vegan wedding buffet for 100 people. It was nut free.

Yabu and extremely selfish.

AntiHop · 27/01/2023 17:54

We're a vegetarian family. I'd have zero problem with this. I'm really glad the other child of being included safely

sanityisamyth · 27/01/2023 17:54

So the choice is your child has to eat different food vs the other child might die or be seriously unwell.

Hmmmmm. Tough one!

QuillBill · 27/01/2023 17:55

Is your dd one of those vegetarians who has a really limited diet?

I'm sure wherever she's staying will not just provide chips and it's quite strange that you think they would. Being a vegetarian is not exactly unusual and I imagine they will be able to manage.

Some schools only provide vegetarian food now.

IsItThough · 27/01/2023 17:55

Your daughter will have plenty of other food choices. Don't be silly.

KickHimInTheCrotch · 27/01/2023 17:55

Presumably your DD is vegetarian by choice? But so fussy she can only eat nuts or chips? How annoying for you.

Grannyyaga · 27/01/2023 17:55

Your child's preference to eat nuts does not override the other child's safety

This ^. YABVU

FrenchandSaunders · 27/01/2023 17:56

Christ you’re nice!

No nuts doesn’t mean a week of chips ffs 🤣

GabriellaMontez · 27/01/2023 17:56

Got to be a reverse.

Ostryga · 27/01/2023 17:57

Yes you should absolutely risk a child’s life so your precious Dd can eat a nut, or whatever response you’re looking for dear troll

LittleBrenda · 27/01/2023 17:58

I get that it's an allergy that could kill

I'm not confident that a diet of nuts and chips is going to keep your child alive either!

Tulipvase · 27/01/2023 17:59

I understand the school expecting it’s children to be nut free but unless it’s an exclusive use of the hotel, they might not be as willing to comply.

Hesma · 27/01/2023 18:00

YABU and very selfish. Your child will cope without nuts for a few days. Surely she eats omelettes, veggie burgers, pasta etc which are nut free?

sunshinealwayscomesback · 27/01/2023 18:01

Just incredibly selfish and I hope this isn't for real.

UmmmBopDeeDooWhop · 27/01/2023 18:02

Tulipvase · 27/01/2023 17:59

I understand the school expecting it’s children to be nut free but unless it’s an exclusive use of the hotel, they might not be as willing to comply.

It still reduces the risk though. If you look before you cross the road you can still get run over but looking first reduces the risk.

And I'm not for banning foods normally but in this situation it seems fair enough to me.

fairysimples · 27/01/2023 18:02

Is this a reverse??

blackbeardsballsack · 27/01/2023 18:03

Heaven forbid your darling should go without nuts for a few days to ensure the survival of some kid. The kid should clearly either be shackled up at home or die, so that your daughter is never again mildly inconvenienced.

Or you could parent properly and teach your daughter to grow up with some humanity (and a more varied diet)

gogohmm · 27/01/2023 18:04

Of course your dd should have nut free food on the coach! Your more difficult issue is your dd getting vegetarian food whilst overseas. I'm guessing continental Europe and from personal experience it's been rather hit and miss, and more miss! Dd isn't overly fussy these days but some days all we can source her are chips, pasta with tomato sauce or if lucky a veggie burger (German restaurants seem to have a packet stashed in their freezers). Italy and Spain are usually ok as long as you speak enough to decipher the menu and aren't worried about the rennet in the cheese

SerenaTee · 27/01/2023 18:04

Ellie09ellie · 27/01/2023 17:41

My daughter is due to go on a school trip abroad in the next week. She is 14. We have just had a message to say no buts on the coach as a child has an airborne allergy. They are also having to ask the hotel to become nut free for the duration of their stay. Is this actually possible or even reasonable given that it's a hotel? My daughter is vegetarian and a lot of her food has nuts in it. Is it unreasonable to expect that after paying quite a bit of money that she gets to eat decent food and not live of chips for a week? I get that it's an allergy that could kill but surely the parents weighed up the issues before sending their child on a trip with 50 other children to a foreign country? Has anyone else been in this position? Thank you

Has anyone else been in the position of thinking their child’s PREFERENCE trumps another child’s LIFE? Give your head a wobble, how selfish are you!

ScramblePud · 27/01/2023 18:05

It’s about balance really. On the one hand, Child A doesn’t want to die from an allergic reaction to nuts. On the other hand, Child B doesn’t want to go a few days without eating nuts. …yeah… that’s a toughie 🙄