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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Circumcision

368 replies

SouthAfricanmuminUK · 26/01/2023 18:02

I was thoroughly abused by several English mums of my acquaintance for having my sons circumcised at birth. Although I did my research and found it to be better from a number of perspectives, nothing would convince them it was reasonable. I am wondering if they will retract their accusations now that it has been revealed that Diana, saintliest of all mothers, had both her boys circumcised ...

Circumcision
OP posts:
KindergartenKop · 26/01/2023 18:04

Ummm...maybe ask them irl, I'm not sure they're on here.

Tbh I don't know anyone who idolises Diana!

Aria2015 · 26/01/2023 18:07

I wouldn't give someone abuse for doing it, but I don't agree with it and knowing Diana did it doesn't change that. My biggest influence is my two brothers, both were circumcised at birth and both feel very strongly that was a violation of their bodily autonomy. They have not had their own son's circumcised.

AFS1 · 26/01/2023 18:11

I don’t give 2 hoots what famous people have or have not been circumcised.
My view will never change: unless there is a specific medical reason, circumcision should never take place without the informed consent of the person whose genitalia are being hacked away at.

Walterwhiteswifey · 26/01/2023 18:14

It's abuse. Sick and wrong. Unless medically NECESSARY it is an abhorrent practice.

GladAllOver · 26/01/2023 18:14

If Diana had her boys circumcised then she was just as wrong as any other mother who had the same done.

Aaron95 · 26/01/2023 18:15

I don't understand why anyone would have their child mutilated in this way. There is zero credible medical evidence that it has any benefits. If it were up to me it would be illegal until the person involved is old enough to decide if they wish to have it done or not. So I guess I am one of those people who will never see it from your perspective.

Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 26/01/2023 18:16

Do people change opinions because of princess Diana?
odd

Walterwhiteswifey · 26/01/2023 18:17

GladAllOver · 26/01/2023 18:14

If Diana had her boys circumcised then she was just as wrong as any other mother who had the same done.

Spot on. I don't care who you are, it is wrong and I would not be friends with a parent who did this. Those poor children.

PermanentTemporary · 26/01/2023 18:18

That was 40 years ago 😳

My brother born in the early 60s was circumcised in the UK. It wasn't uncommon then. Increasingly infant circumcision is unusual in the UK, as the very obvious fact that it is a ritual with zero medical justification in most cases becomes clear.

I had my son circumcised and I regret it. Which perhaps puts me in an unusual position.

AnuSTart · 26/01/2023 18:18

AFS1 · 26/01/2023 18:11

I don’t give 2 hoots what famous people have or have not been circumcised.
My view will never change: unless there is a specific medical reason, circumcision should never take place without the informed consent of the person whose genitalia are being hacked away at.

Couldn't say it any better.
When I hear people say they've done it to their children with no medical urgency or need I lose respect for them and they finally fade from my life. Thank goodness.
Why would anyone give a shit what Diana did. She's was obviously just as irrational as some other mothers then!

Novemberhater · 26/01/2023 18:20

My DGS had it done for medical reasons. It was a horrible recovery for a small boy. My cousin's DGS was maimed permanently when he had it done as a newborn because his mum thought it was "cleaner".

Oysterbabe · 26/01/2023 18:21

No, I don't think it's OK to chop bits off your baby that you don't want, even if Diana did it.

DaveyJonesLocker · 26/01/2023 18:23

Circumcision is vile. If you wouldn't mutilate your daughters genitals then don't mutilate your sons.

I also don't feel like Diana made a lot of decisions for herself, but no I don't agree with it, for her, or anyone expect those who need it for medical reason.

How you could leave your son with a red raw open wound in his nappy is beyond me.

DaveyJonesLocker · 26/01/2023 18:24

Ugh *except

Timeforachangeisitnot · 26/01/2023 18:25

you say ‘better from a number of perspectives’ - may I ask what they were?

I have heard religious reasons, I have US friends who believe no male can be expected to clean under his fore skin, and clearly medical necessity, but I have not heard others.
Genuinely curious what those are.

Aishah231 · 26/01/2023 18:32

Do you also agree with FGM OP? Would you if Diana did?

TidyDancer · 26/01/2023 18:36

I doubt you were actually 'thoroughly abused' but you were wrong to do it to your sons unless there was a medical need as it is vile. Diana also making a vile decision doesn't make yours any better.

SaltySeaAir · 26/01/2023 18:36

I'm astonished it is allowed.

My son was circumcised when he was 5 for medical reasons - it was awful. I cannot imagine why any parent would ever choose to do that without good cause.

OhDeniseReally · 26/01/2023 18:36

It is/was the "done thing" in the British Royal Family, but that doesn't make it right...

HoodieBell · 26/01/2023 18:43

I don't care who else has done it, nothing could persuade me to mutilate my child's genitals. There are no benefits to it that can't be achieved from teaching boys basic hygiene practices, but the negatives are numerous.

1000umbrellas · 26/01/2023 18:45

Timeforachangeisitnot · 26/01/2023 18:25

you say ‘better from a number of perspectives’ - may I ask what they were?

I have heard religious reasons, I have US friends who believe no male can be expected to clean under his fore skin, and clearly medical necessity, but I have not heard others.
Genuinely curious what those are.

It has been shown to reduce transmission of HIV, which is really important in countries wwith high prevalence like SA where OP seems to be from. The WHO recommends it for men for this reason, though they specify voluntary circumstanceswhich would seem to exclude boys. Royal or not. * *

Redglitter · 26/01/2023 18:46

It's a terrible thing to do to a child & I expect they'll think she was every bit as wrong to do it as you were

Who in the right mind would think it was suddenly OK to do just because a celebrity did it 🙄

1000umbrellas · 26/01/2023 18:46

Circumcision, not circumstances. My autocorrect is so prudish!

CatJumperTwat · 26/01/2023 18:47

All the excuses for circumcision are bizarre and illogical but this might be the worst one of all!

MisschiefMaker · 26/01/2023 18:47

I can't imagine feeling entitled to permanently maim my child and potentially interfere with their ability to enjoy sex later in life, if there is no medical reason. Parents should not have the right to do that imo.

Bit ironic of the OP to use the word "abuse" when describing her friends reaction to her decision to ... abuse her son. Very different categories of abuse!