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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed about being asked to pick up poo?

229 replies

WFHbore2023 · 25/01/2023 13:15

I'm going to start this by saying - I did do it. I'm annoyed at myself, but I was a bit stunned.
I was walking along with my dog, earphones in. A woman with a pushchair was walking along the same path, walking towards us.
She pointed at some poo on the floor and said something to me, which I didn’t hear as I had my earphones in. I assumed she was asking if it was my dogs poo, so I just said no. I took out an earphone and she said ‘have you got a poo bag? will you pick it up? I hate it when people leave poo’
I was a bit shocked so just picked it up and said ‘yeah, me too’ but afterwards I was like ‘wtf?!’
In hindsight, I should have just given her a bag to pick it up if she’s so bothered by it!
I pick up my dogs poo, and I happily do it, because that is MY job! It’s not my job to pick up other peoples dog poo, it’s bloody gross!
It would be like me pointing to a dirty nappy on the floor and expecting her to pick it up, just because she has a child with her.
Was she BU, or am I for being annoyed that she asked me to?

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 25/01/2023 13:17

While she probably could have asked more politely she probably assumed you had a bag, although she could have asked for a bag to do it herself.
She has probably had to scrape enough dog shit off her pram wheels to be quite sensitive about it though

Bowsersfightnight · 25/01/2023 13:18

Ew no! YNBU, there’s something extra gross about picking up another dogs poo, definitely should’ve handed her the bag!

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 25/01/2023 13:18

You could have offered her a baggie to pick it up herself.

BillHadersNewWife · 25/01/2023 13:18

It was definitely bold and confident of her to ask. In a way she was right but you've learned a lesson not to do as others are telling you because some people are just bossy.

Dotjones · 25/01/2023 13:19

I'd say YABU, what difference does it make picking up your own dog's shit compared to another dog's? Your picking shit up off the ground either way. Personally I'd have just ignored her, your first mistake was to engage with her at all - the point of earphones is you don't have to speak to other people when out and about.

Original poster
WFHbore2023 · 25/01/2023 13:19

BillHadersNewWife · 25/01/2023 13:18

It was definitely bold and confident of her to ask. In a way she was right but you've learned a lesson not to do as others are telling you because some people are just bossy.

In what way was she right?
Why is it more my duty to pick it up than hers?

OP posts:
SmileWithADimple · 25/01/2023 13:20

Yes you could have asked her to do it. But I don't think it was unreasonable of her to ask (given that you were walking a dog). She probably thought you wouldn't mind.

Original poster
WFHbore2023 · 25/01/2023 13:20

Dotjones · 25/01/2023 13:19

I'd say YABU, what difference does it make picking up your own dog's shit compared to another dog's? Your picking shit up off the ground either way. Personally I'd have just ignored her, your first mistake was to engage with her at all - the point of earphones is you don't have to speak to other people when out and about.

Believe me, it's a huge difference. In the same way that I'd be more relaxed about my own children soiling on me than I would a random child

OP posts:
Bowsersfightnight · 25/01/2023 13:21

Dotjones · 25/01/2023 13:19

I'd say YABU, what difference does it make picking up your own dog's shit compared to another dog's? Your picking shit up off the ground either way. Personally I'd have just ignored her, your first mistake was to engage with her at all - the point of earphones is you don't have to speak to other people when out and about.

The difference is one is HER dog which is her responsibility and the other one is absolutely nothing to do with her and no more her responsibility than the other lady!

Greensleeves · 25/01/2023 13:22

She was unreasonable to assume it was your dog's mess, and to demand that you pick it up when it wasn't yours.

However I would point out that lots of people (me included) are feeling increasingly desperate about the sheer amount of dog shit in public areas. It's appalling and getting worse all the time. No dog owner would ever admit to leaving it - it's always somebody else, but there is SO fucking much of it, everywhere. It's actually ruined a lot of local beauty spots for me - I just can't go and enjoy them any more.

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 25/01/2023 13:23

BillHadersNewWife · 25/01/2023 13:18

It was definitely bold and confident of her to ask. In a way she was right but you've learned a lesson not to do as others are telling you because some people are just bossy.

In what was she right?

If there are two children in the park, and both are screaming would you ask one mother to ask someone else’s child to stop screaming?

Backtoreality1 · 25/01/2023 13:24

To be honest I do this regularly....find it irritating that I am paying for the poo bags for someone elses dog, but if I am out with mine and it is in the middle of a walkway then I do pick it up.....don't touch it if it is off to the side though. Just doing a bit of civic duty. Leaving it doesn't teach other dog walkers any manners as they just ignore it anyway, so do my bit to keep my area clean

Annoyingwurringnoise · 25/01/2023 13:26

She asked you to do something community spirited, and you did it, I don’t see what the issue is.

ZenNudist · 25/01/2023 13:27

I think you should have given her the bag if you objected to doing it yourself.

Or said no I will not give you a bag As they cost money and I buy them to pick up my own dogs poop.

Or say Haven't you got a nappy sack you can use?

I can see that as a dog owner you are not a public service for picking up poop but on this one occasion does it really matter and makes the world A better place.

Cleaning dog shit off a pram wheels isthe absolute worst!

peaceandpotato · 25/01/2023 13:27

She might have assumed you knew an appropriate technique for picking up shit as you had a dog. But yeah. Odd ask.

Justmeandthedog1 · 25/01/2023 13:27

To me once you’ve picked up one lot of dog poo, you’ve picked it all up.
I’ve picked up after other dogs on footpaths, even on the prom here ( where dogs are supposed to be on leads so how anyone can miss their dog having a poo is beyond me) Good quality poo bags and it’s no big deal. Can imagine nothing worse to clean out of buggy wheels.

Primroseprimula · 25/01/2023 13:29

I don't think any dog owner should feel obligated to pick up other dogs poo, but it would be nice if there was more of a sense of collective responsibility. A bit like of you accidently left a poo, it would be nice if another dog walker spotted it and picked it up.

There is so much dog poo everywhere now, but if you ask dog owners every single one with vehemently deny that it's them. It must be someone, and I don't see it as such a massive deal occasionally picking up one that doesn't belong to your dog.

peaceandpotato · 25/01/2023 13:29

Justmeandthedog1 · 25/01/2023 13:27

To me once you’ve picked up one lot of dog poo, you’ve picked it all up.
I’ve picked up after other dogs on footpaths, even on the prom here ( where dogs are supposed to be on leads so how anyone can miss their dog having a poo is beyond me) Good quality poo bags and it’s no big deal. Can imagine nothing worse to clean out of buggy wheels.

Nah some poo is real runny and stinky. I wouldn't go near it unless it had come from my own dog.

Original poster
WFHbore2023 · 25/01/2023 13:30

Justmeandthedog1 · 25/01/2023 13:27

To me once you’ve picked up one lot of dog poo, you’ve picked it all up.
I’ve picked up after other dogs on footpaths, even on the prom here ( where dogs are supposed to be on leads so how anyone can miss their dog having a poo is beyond me) Good quality poo bags and it’s no big deal. Can imagine nothing worse to clean out of buggy wheels.

Urgh, I hate it.
I've accidentally picked up a poo that I thought was my dogs poo in amongst leaves once...knew instantly it wasn't hers because of the temperature of it 🤣
Then I had to spend ages searching around for hers with this foreign poo fresh in my mind 🤢

OP posts:
Laiste · 25/01/2023 13:30

She pointed at some poo on the floor and said something to me, which I didn’t hear as I had my earphones in ... I took out an earphone and she said ‘have you got a poo bag? will you pick it up?'

If i had been you i would have reiterated that it wasn't my dog's poo, agreed it's awful, and handed her a bag but not picked it up.

SheWoreYellow · 25/01/2023 13:31

Primroseprimula · 25/01/2023 13:29

I don't think any dog owner should feel obligated to pick up other dogs poo, but it would be nice if there was more of a sense of collective responsibility. A bit like of you accidently left a poo, it would be nice if another dog walker spotted it and picked it up.

There is so much dog poo everywhere now, but if you ask dog owners every single one with vehemently deny that it's them. It must be someone, and I don't see it as such a massive deal occasionally picking up one that doesn't belong to your dog.

It teaches people that if they don’t pick it up, someone else will.

MaverickGooseGoose · 25/01/2023 13:31

Did she think it was your dog's?

No way am I picking up other poo, I know my dog has been wormed for a start.

ThreeFeetTall · 25/01/2023 13:31

Did you actually tell her it wasn't your dogs?

Original poster
WFHbore2023 · 25/01/2023 13:32

Laiste · 25/01/2023 13:30

She pointed at some poo on the floor and said something to me, which I didn’t hear as I had my earphones in ... I took out an earphone and she said ‘have you got a poo bag? will you pick it up?'

If i had been you i would have reiterated that it wasn't my dog's poo, agreed it's awful, and handed her a bag but not picked it up.

That's what I would have liked to have done. I think I was a bit taken aback to be asked to pick up some random shit, just because I happen to be a dog owner

OP posts:
R0ckets · 25/01/2023 13:32

How weird of her. By all means ask for a bag because you're likely to ahve plenty spare when walking the dog (and when not walking the dog too as they seem to make there way into every pocket) but it was very bizarre of her to assume you should be picking it up when it wasn't your dogs mess.

I'm not sure most dog owners would be happy at picking up after other dogs. If she wanted it cleaning up so desperately she could absolutely have done it herself.