I wonder if you would feel resentful over this?

[Muchmunching]

A friend of mine had a tough few days as her Aunt passed and this really affected her. Her Aunt passed on Saturday and on Sunday she was dreading work but didn't feel she could take a couple of days off as losing money would cause her hardship. She is a self employed cleaner.

After spending much time with her over the weekend and her saying she really didn't feel up to it. I offered to cover her pay for the 2 days to give her some extra time to gather her thoughts etc.

Many options were discussed and she really didn't feel working was the option she wanted. She was adamant.
I transferred her the money so she wasn't at a loss financially.

I have since discovered she made the decision to work. When I asked her about this, she said after some thought, she felt she wanted to go in.

I won't be asking her to return the money and she hasn't offered but I do feel a bit resentful.
I'm not wrong to feel this way as it is how I feel but wondered if others would feel the same?

Oh

Fuck

SO she's just a basketcase then

That is an awful update. I think she's been playing you.

Oh my god. I absolutely cannot believe someone would be so low as to lie to you about a family member dying solely to take advantage of your good nature and get free money. What a total cow!

Sorry OP.

Wow. That’s despicable

Just finished catching up on the thread and can't believe your update OP. So sorry to hear this :( she clearly is not a true friend, I wonder if there more to this and she's in some financial difficulties and has spun a big web of lies to try and get financial support from people? Just awful :(

WHAT!

What possible justification could she have?

Oh. That’s awful. What a scammer.
I suspect you will never see that money again, but you did a kind thing which is not to be underestimated. Kind is generally a good thing to be. I’m sorry you have been so let down.

Just awful OP x

My first reaction is pain for her. What on earth is she going through to make her go to such an extreme?

I'm seeing her tomorrow so I can hopefully try and make some sense of this.

I will return and let you know as everyone has been so kind with their advice and I feel I can voice feelings here that I can't in the real world.

I am sure she will spend tonight coming up with a story to explain why she did this and to keep you on her fishing line in case she needs more from you. I completely understand your inner desire to make sense of it and to figure out an innocent explanation for this where you can put her behavior down to some sort of pain or struggle. But one thing I have learned from dealing with users is that trying to create an explanation of their behavior can sometimes just be a way to avoid the pain of seeing that they are using you.

Agree with @aloris she'll come up with a sob story and request for more cash!

Are you usually a doormat? Does she have form for taking advantage of you?

I can only assume (if this is a real story) that she sees you as an easy target and knew you would offer money in this scenario. There has to be a reason she thought this would work.

Whaaaaat??????

I actually look like the 😲 emoji

Is she usually honest?

OP I cannot think of any reason acceptable for her to lie and manipulate you like this. I really hope she gives you the money back and feels completely ashamed.

Did the CF “friend” admit this, or did you find out from someone else?

My goodness, @Muchmunching , that's so upsetting. How did this come to light??

Christ, I hope you are OK @Muchmunching what a horrible thing to do to you

I know someone like this. I half want to ask if it's her 😂. Does her name start with an L?

I had to completely cut her off once I realised what kind of person she is.

Unbelievable! What an awful thing to do. Did she ask you to give her money or did she simply predict your kindness? That means you are a good friend and a kind person and although putting yourself in this financial position for a month is really tough, you can hold your head up high and learn from this. Better rid of her, she is no friend, terrible thing to do.

That is disgusting and I wouldn't want to see her again
You're too kind and she took advantage
Don't give her another opportunity

I wouldn't be happy with that

Omg that’s terrible @Muchmunching , can’t believe anyone would do that 😢

@Muchmunching - how did it go when you saw her? There must be something very strange going on to make someone come up with this, what a big lie to tell and what a roundabout way to get someone to give you money.

@Muchmunching have you seen Your friend since? Hope you’re ok 💐