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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How can she be left like this? Take her back to A&E?

703 replies

Fearsheisdying · 23/01/2023 17:51

Posting for traffic has honestly I'm terrified something is seriously wrong with my Mum and don't know what to do so please be nice.

Last week she started with some pain that she says feels like it's right at the very bottom of her ribs and radiating round the sides. She was in agony, basically screaming with pain so I took her to A&E on the advice of 111. All obs and ECG were normal but the blood tests were abnormal. They were going to do a CT scan but then decided as her obs were ok and they didn't think there was a bleed as no fall/injury, they were not going to do a CT scan there but would refer it to the GP to arrange BUT because of the blood test results and recent weightloss, they wanted it done urgently under the "2 week rule" and from his grave tone, I highly suspect he thinks it's cancer and serious. They couldn't/wouldn't give her anymore painkillers because of the painkillers she's on for severe arthritis but these are not touching the pain.

Fast forward to today, she has been in absolute agony since Thursday and seems worse today and can barely move. She's exhausted and crying/screaming in pain. My sister called 999 today but they said as not life threatening they won't send an ambulance but had to speak to GP within an hour. GP receptionist tried to say no appointments so we couldn't speak to GP but after I explained the issue (and she could hear my Mum crying out in pain) she finally agreed to pass a message to the GP so currently waiting to see if GP will call back today or not. Mum says if I take her back to A&E we'll be sat for hours again and nothing will be done but I can't just sit here and watch her in so much pain and do nothing.

What do I do?! Do I make her let me take her to A&E? Do we wait to see if the GP will call? Just feel so helpless

OP posts:
Original poster
Fearsheisdying · 31/01/2023 20:25

@Untitledsquatboulder there are "shadows" on the CT scan which is why they are keen to get a full colonoscopy done.

@Asiama I've been keeping your Mum's story in my mind through this rollercoaster journey.

@Sugarfree23 we haven't really been given any next steps other than they need to do another colonoscopy but haven't been told when that will happen. I don't think tomorrow as I think they're giving her a break from the prep stuff today and using standard laxitives as she was nil by mouth for 24 hours more or less for the colonoscopy with the delays

OP posts:
PigsinBlankets22 · 31/01/2023 23:05

Sorry you are no closer to having answers ☹️

It sounds like the moviprep didn't clear the bowel like it should have done. If they can't get good views of the colon because of faeces (whether formed or loose), the test can be incomplete. If they saw a mass (non faecal) whilst they were in there, they would usually have taken biopsies and they would be discussing it with you and your mother. But it sounds like they didn't get all the way around the colon or to the area that highlighted a mass on the CT. They will probably give your mother oral laxatives for several days before the moviprep - this usually helps clear the bowel.

I hope you are able to get answers soon x

LookItsMeAgain · 01/02/2023 09:17

I hope your mum and you get the answers that you're looking for today or very soon.

Icecreamandapplepie · 03/02/2023 00:03

Thinking of you and your mum.

Hope you're both bearing up OK x

Original poster
Fearsheisdying · 03/02/2023 21:27

Sorry for the lack of updates but not much to update really. She's still in hospital and hoping another colonoscopy will be done Mon/Tues. The nurse did mention to me yesterday that there is a "lump" in her bowel so there is some kind of growth but still none the wiser as to what it is. The wait to know is frustrating to say the least but at least she is being looked at.

OP posts:
LifeIsJustOneBigWTAF · 03/02/2023 22:12

Sending lots of positive thoughts your way. I know from experience how exhausting and terrifying the waiting and uncertainty can be. I hope you get answers soon. You're doing really well x

Warmhandscoldheart · 03/02/2023 23:05

💐

SirVixofVixHall · 03/02/2023 23:36

I hope it is done on Monday OP. Is she still in a lot of pain ?

Original poster
Fearsheisdying · 04/02/2023 00:13

SirVixofVixHall · 03/02/2023 23:36

I hope it is done on Monday OP. Is she still in a lot of pain ?

The pain is under control for the most part. There is still pain but she says it's "bearable" although today was more increased than it has been. There's some nice ladies on the ward she's in and they all sit and have a chat. My Mum can talk for England 😂

OP posts:
SirVixofVixHall · 04/02/2023 00:17

I am glad there are some friendly women on the ward with her. I know it helped my Mum when she was in hospital, it is a nice distraction to be able to talk and sympathise with other people.
I hope all goes well with the next colonoscopy. She is not elderly, and even if she does needs surgery bowel cancer is very treatable. Wishing her all the best.

2018SoFarSoGreat · 04/02/2023 02:14

Ah how lovely she is able to chat and can enjoy the ward gossip. My DM loved it for round the clock entertainment, when she was well enough to join in.

Here's to getting this figured out very soon.

LulooLemon · 04/02/2023 12:06

Sending virtual hugs to you and your mum. Colonoscopy will give lots of information and from there she can look at treatment options.

Patineur · 04/02/2023 13:06

Have they done an MRI scan? When my mother was taken to hospital with what turned out to be bowel blockage they found out via a scan. They also discovered that she had a bladder tumour, which wasn't what was causing the problem, but the point is that via the scan they were able to detect both including the fact that the bowel problem was simply impacted faeces. They told me that they needed to get a nano-gastric tube down her to treat it, which was doomed to failure because she simply pulled it out again. However, I did manage to persuade her to drink a bottle of what I take to have been some sort of strong laxative which resolved the immediate problem relatively quickly.

Original poster
Fearsheisdying · 04/02/2023 17:21

@Patineur no MRI scan but she has had a CT scan nearly 2 weeks ago which shows impaction but also something else that they need to investigate as they don't know what it is. She's been having oral laxtives and enemas for well over a week, as well as the bowel prep stuff last weekend for the colonoscopy that they weren't able to complete. Honestly I'm surprised there is anything left in her at all!

OP posts:
Sugarfree23 · 04/02/2023 19:54

I've been reading along and following. What is their next step?
Are they going to operate?

Original poster
Fearsheisdying · 04/02/2023 21:12

Sugarfree23 · 04/02/2023 19:54

I've been reading along and following. What is their next step?
Are they going to operate?

No, no mention of operating and to be honest at the moment I think that would be a last resort. Due to weightloss she is currently now considered underweight (dieticians now involved also) plus she has been on oxygen until Thursday, so I think operating is too risky at present. When they did the colonoscopy on Monday, there was still blockage so they've continued to give her oral laxatives along with enemas to try and clear anything remaining (although they stopped the enemas yesterday) with the hope of being able to do another colonoscopy on Tuesday.

OP posts:
Sugarfree23 · 04/02/2023 21:17

Hope she gets it sooner than Tuesday that seems like ages away.

CharlotteRose90 · 05/02/2023 01:02

If there’s a blockage they can’t shift they’ll look into operating. Sometimes laxatives and enemas don’t shift things enough.

Original poster
Fearsheisdying · 05/02/2023 01:07

@Sugarfree23 I agree, it does seem so far away and we're just desparate for answers now.

@CharlotteRose90 that is possibly the next step if they can't do the 2nd colonoscopy (although they haven't said that yet) but I think would be the very last alternative given my Mum's physical conditon at the minute x

OP posts:
nettie434 · 05/02/2023 14:40

I've been following this hoping you and your mum can find out exactly what's wrong and get the right treatment. Sorry it's been such a long process. I'm glad your mum is in hospital rather than being in pain at home. Sending you my best wishes.

NicolaSturgeonsSOGIbottom · 05/02/2023 14:48

I’m glad your mum has good company on the ward.

Fingers crossed the dietitians can help her get to a healthy weight and you have some answers soon

LookItsMeAgain · 06/02/2023 12:27

I'm hoping that they will be able to find out exactly what the cause of your mum's pain is.

Princesspollyyy · 06/02/2023 13:50

LookItsMeAgain · 06/02/2023 12:27

I'm hoping that they will be able to find out exactly what the cause of your mum's pain is.

They have? Maybe read the thread?

Bluekerfuffle · 06/02/2023 14:00

Princesspollyyy · 06/02/2023 13:50

They have? Maybe read the thread?

Show quote history

Don’t think they have. Just a few posts up the OP is still hoping for answers.

OneTC · 06/02/2023 15:08

CharlotteRose90 · 05/02/2023 01:02

If there’s a blockage they can’t shift they’ll look into operating. Sometimes laxatives and enemas don’t shift things enough.

When my mum had a blockage/diverticulitis they said they wouldn't operate given her age and health.