To not let DD (13) watch Love Island

[ChocolatewithWine]

She keeps asking to watch it, she kept asking last year as well. DH thinks she’s ok to watch it but I disagree, AIBU? I’ve never watched it so don’t know what it’s like really. I just think that 13 is a bit young for something like Love Island, this is only based on the little that I know about it though.

Examples of that are?

@BritainsGotTalons - obviously we’ve talked about these issues before Love Island but the programme plays them out irl and provides further opportunity for discussion.

Self absorbed people obsessed with looks, sitting around all day talking about connections and catching feelings whilst trying to keep their inflated lips in one piece.....can't think of anything worse to let my DD watch.

If she gets into this kind of crap at 13, it will influence her. This is an important thing you can do for your daughter!!

I didn’t resist when DD14 wanted to watch last year - she requested we watch together. It’s bloody awful and I couldn’t help rolling my eyes most of the way through but did give opportunities for us to discuss lots of issues around dating, sex and the patriarchy. She wanted to watch again this year but a couple of episodes in, she says she’s finding it all too cringey which she puts down to being more mature this year. She still wants to watch but only for Farmer Will who I think seems more grounded than the other contestants.

Why don't you watch it with her? That way you can point out how unhealthy it is and why, as well as why it's a total craphole of a show

@LottoLaura why would I lie about watching love island? And nice tik tok reference. The show is incredibly misogynistic. Sorry if you don't see that. Probably miss a lot of misogyny in your own life

@crispsandnuts exactly, there is absolutely nothing on that show that a 13 needs to be listening to or learning about at that age. Absolute vapid, superficial tripe that comes out all their fake mouths.

Well your interpretation of the show seems to be inaccurate, hence my reply.

Personally I think all the young women have good self esteem and high expectations of how they should be treated by boys. I would let my 14 year old watch it now if she was interested.

Yanbu, it's utter shite and not really something I want my kids watching. It's not representative of the kind of relationships I want my children to be in and the way I want them to behave.

Thankfully, my DD (aged 15) would rather shit in her hands and clap than watch it, she has never even asked to watch it. It's just not her thing.

I however, love crap reality TV and watch it every night! My family despair of me. I am beyond help.

@madeyemoody - haha that’s not a TikTok reference, that’s been around long before TikTok 😂

Well done your daughter, maybe rather than letting them watch garbage because everyone else does they should be encouraged to be discerning and not to simply follow the herd.

I am trying to remember what age my DD first watched love island I think she was year 10 so 15. We watched it together and agree it did open a lot of conversations around relationships and behaviour.

It is totally trash TV but peer pressure is difficult at that age.

I wouldn't. I watch it and everyday things are fine, but I find they get over sexual in the challenges with positions etc.

My 13 year old asked me what a blow job was and was horrified when I told her 🤣 her sex ed today was contraception 🙄. I know she's going to learn about these things from elsewhere, but right now I'm saying no.

I agree. I watched it previously with my 15 year old and had lots of "chats" about self image, respect for yourself and your body, how a man should and shouldn't treat you etc etc!

Yy, it's one thing when children overhear about things in the playground but it's another when their parents LET them be exposed to things when they're so young.

Exposed to what?

Much as it would gall me, I’d watch it with her. Luckily my boys have no interest but I’ve always watched soaps and they have proved useful for opening up conversations about issues over the years.
I wouldn’t leave her to watch it in bed on her phone, which is what she’ll do if you ban it.

I can understand this, but I try to have these convos with my DC anyway.

There's no chance I'd let a 13 year old watch it. I've yet to meet a 13 year old with the genuine emotional maturity and understanding of context/wider issues to process the framing of toxic relationships/female representation meaningfully.

OP - you might like to have a browse of the Telly Addicts thread, to give you some idea of what goes on.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/telly_addicts/4708514-love-island-winter-2023-pre-series-discussion?reply=123244556

I wouldn't let my 12yo watch but it would bore her. My 16yo watches and its opened up loads of conversations on red flags, consent, how you present yourself, social media behaviour etc etc which I hope has made her more aware and have more self respect.

Why don't you actually watch it yourself so you can have an informed opinion?

They also show them having sex under a sheet. 13 yo has probably seen worse but not sure I'd encourage them to watch it. Seems to normalise this as ok behaviour

It's practically porn!! I wouldn't at 13 far too young!!