Workplace bully, upsetting comments about pregnancy

[Usernamesonly]

Sorry for the long post, would rather get all information in one go to not drip feed. I work in a family run business (sales) 6 offices across the county, around 50 staff in total and a third party HR company. I work in an office with 3 wonderful people, and 1 person who has been removed from our department but still working within our office. Been here around 3 years, LOVE my job, love my colleagues but we have an awful workplace bully who I'm 99% sure only has his job still because he earns the company a lot of money. We have collectively complained about this individual (hence him now being in a different department) but still seeing him daily. Complaining about him is difficult because he will 1) know who the complainer is 2) Make our lives truly miserable. It's not worth it and he has escaped any repercussions from HR numerous times. I'm trying not to worry or stress because I'm 20 weeks pregnant and haven't got too long until maternity leave.

However, today he has insulted me beyond belief and I don't know what to do about it. His words were "Why are you dressed like that? You're pregnant? Get a bra that fits, your t*ts are everywhere and your skirt looks ridiculous. Maybe you should just remain office based for the time being". I was wearing black tights, a black pencil skirt, a white shirt (no cleavage!) and a black cardigan over. Admittedly they aren't "maternity" but I'm too small for maternity and too big for my normal size so have opted for stretchy bottoms. I actually think I looked as professional as I always do (just not so slim). Maybe it's just the hormones but I'm disgusted and feel so embarrassed - already worrying about what to wear tomorrow! This was said infront of my colleagues who thought I should report it, but I really don't know if it's worth it. Have my life made miserable and be caught in a whirlwind half way through my pregnancy?

What would you do? I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place (and maybe just need to vent because I'm utterly shocked!)

Report it. Otherwise he'll carry on.

That is 100% workplace harassment. Write down his exact words, send them to the independent HR people, tell them they’re enabling his behaviour by taking no action, and leave it at that. Your colleagues know he’s in the wrong, so do HR and the management. Yes he’ll know it’s you who complained, but can he do anything about it? HR still might do nothing but it will be on record that you know they know.

I work for a large corporate well known brand and that would be a sackable offence.

It doesn’t matter where you work or who owns the company, that it’s disgraceful behaviour.

I’d say he’s just finally done enough to shoot himself in the foot.

Definitely report. If I was one of your colleagues and had heard that I would be reporting him too.

Report him. Yes he will know it’s you but he cannot speak to a colleague (or anyone) like that. Not even a case that could be misinterpreted.

Definitely report!

Good God OP no way would I let this go. This vile excuse of a man needs reporting.
If your colleagues heard him they can all be included as witnesses in your complaint.
Why on earth is gd still there he sounds disgusting.

WTF have I just read.
Report this vile human being.
He can’t really say much worse to you than that.

I thought reporting it might be the common response (particularly as I also feel it's the right thing to do). I'm so worried though. I'm in my early 20's and this bully is in his 50's, has lots of local connections and I'm worried it's going to effect my job from him dragging my name through the mud.

I'm also scared that nothing will happen and I will have to work in a small room with him with my anxiety being sky high and dreading work for the remainder of my pregnancy. Do you think he would at-least be suspended? or maybe I could work from home. I feel in such an awkward position.

OP, I actually would call that verbal assault.

I cannot believe what I have read.

I think you need to Email HR and contact ACAS for advice.

I would feel desperately upset, intimidated, humiliated and verbally assaulted.

Please name the various witnesses.

You need this down on paper and recorded.

Any reputable company would call that a stackable offense and should you feel you are pushed out by him and forced tp resign I think that would be evidence for constructive dismissal.

Be clever here and have this recorded by HR.

You have to contact ACAS for advice too.

It's actually hard to believe someone would say that.

You also need to cc all those above you.

They can't pretend then weren't informed of his verbal abuse of you, a pregnant employee.

Well that's him done and dusted.

Write it down word for word whilst you remember.

If there were any witnesses write their names down too.

The tomorrow morning send that to HR and ask that they protect you and the business from this man.

I think if a man comments on a part of your body "get a bra that fits your tits are everywhere" is sexual harassment.

Hope you have not took this to heart.

You should raise this with hr.

I would ask your colleagues to report it with you for moral support and as witnesses. Insulting you for being pregnant and wearing a certain outfit is nasty enough, but to critisise your breasts is truly disgusting. What is wrong with him.

You really should report him, what a vile man.

Critically, did he say in front of anyone else except you?

Btw, this is the kind of thing that gets you removed from your post so this guy is presumably on paint thinner to make remarks like that.

Report it. If the company does nothing would you really still want to work at a place like that?

@LexMitior it was said in front of me and two of my colleagues (who were equally as shocked).

Im thinking of maybe talking to my manager tomorrow morning and asking if he could have a word with said individual and make a note of what has been said. I would feel more comfortable indirectly raising it (which is a totally cop out)

Report him. This is not the first time, he's already been moved because of his behaviour. This needs to be legally documented. He's making himself unemployable. No matter his connections, any employer won't touch him with a barge pole.

Report it word for word. Type out a transcript (as above) and get your witnesses to sign it.

Express disgust that the company tolerates sexism and misogynistic abuse.

And ask the witnesses to sign your statement. Even if they won't sign make sure you record that they were witnesses.

That is illegal workplace harassment. Make a dated and signed record of what happened now - in as much detail as possible including place, witnesses.

In your shoes I would raise a grievance.

What are you scared will happen?

The trouble is, if you don't act, he will be waiting for your return and will ramp up the awful misogynistic bullying. I think you have to complain and report this behaviour and any subsequent bullying before you leave. If the firm don't take action, then go to ACAS.

Stop being so scared and stand up for yourself!
report him. And get your colleagues to also report. How fucking dare he say those things! Do NOT let another disgusting sexisy pig get away with this!

STAND UP!!

Dear higher ups and HR,
I am writing to raise a formal grievance.

Yesterday at (time) in (location) X said to me: ‘quote’. This was witnessed by Y and Z who are willing to go on record to confirm this.

I would be grateful if you could let me know a time when I can meet with you to discuss this grievance. I will be accompanied by A.

Yours sincerely,
Usernamesonly