... to not want a television in the sitting room?

angelico53 · 2023-01-15T07:34:26+00:00

We live in a small modern house with a sitting room and a kitchen diner on the ground floor. We haven't had a television for donkeys' years, when we used to have a TV room in a bigger house.

atteatimeeverybodyagrees · 15/01/2023 07:35

Up to you really isn't it

NomadG · 15/01/2023 07:35

What's the issue?

Oysterbabe · 15/01/2023 07:38

Do what you want?

They're hardly intrusive these days. They can be hung on the wall and even have a picture screensaver so it doesn't look like a TV. It'll be there for the rare occasions you want it then.

MilkyYay · 15/01/2023 07:38

You can have/not have what you want?

DashboardConfessional · 15/01/2023 07:38

Depends what you do in there. I only really sit in ours to watch a film/show in the evenings.

Whaleandsnail6 · 15/01/2023 07:41

Does someone else who lives in the house want a TV in the sitting room? Is that why you are asking if you are unreasonable?

sorrynotathome · 15/01/2023 07:41

YABU. HTH

Original poster

angelico53 · 15/01/2023 07:41

Soz - continuing.

We watch screen stuff on our laptops or on an iMac on the coffee table. Now there's talk of a 42" or bigger TV. I'd better let it all hang out: this will destroy the living room. It's ugly, dominant, will obscure a lovely view and (worse still) will be a portal for bilge to empty ino the room.

Also - background but maybe very bad, ultimately - though my partner is fine with a TV in the room, she is implacable in getting rid of any musical instrument. No guitars, even on floor stands (I won't hang an instrument on a wall) and no keyboard.

I can go to the bedroom when ithe TV's on, I guess.

But am I unreasonable to believe that this is all going wrong?

OP posts:

ladywithnomanors · 15/01/2023 07:41

And ?

LlynTegid · 15/01/2023 07:42

Your choice, though I'd say some tv is much better on a tv than a laptop screen.

Galliano · 15/01/2023 07:44

When my DC now in mid twenties were small they had a couple of friends without tvs and the children never wanted to do anything but watch tv when they came to ours. I wouldn’t make a point of no tv in that way.

These days there are so many options for consumption so if everyone is satisfied that they can watch anything they really want via a laptop or whatever you don’t need a tv and aren’t unreasonable not to have one. If other members of the household want a tv I think you’re probably unreasonable to deny them.

DashboardConfessional · 15/01/2023 07:44

If you have a small modern house with 2 downstairs rooms you've not really got room for musical instruments or a large TV.

frostygarden · 15/01/2023 07:44

I don't see the difference between watching screen stuff on your laptops or on a TV? Both are equally 'portals to bilge'. The secret is to just not look at the bilge. 😘

heldinadream · 15/01/2023 07:45

Sounds like you have only just moved in together and are now discovering that you are fundamentally incompatible.
Is there more backstory to this?

IncompleteSenten · 15/01/2023 07:45

Why not say no TV and no instruments or TV and instruments?

Say to her that it's not reasonable for her to say no instruments and it's not reasonable for you to say no TV because it's a shared space so you should compromise on both or neither rather than one person getting their ideal setup and the other getting the one they hate.

NomadG · 15/01/2023 07:45

I still don't understand. What do you mean with the instruments?

Boswellonthesteps · 15/01/2023 07:47

wtf has musical instruments got to do with not having a tv if you don’t want a tv, you don’t need mn to justify it. Just don’t get a tv

Original poster

angelico53 · 15/01/2023 07:49

heldinadream · 15/01/2023 07:45

Sounds like you have only just moved in together and are now discovering that you are fundamentally incompatible.
Is there more backstory to this?

We've been together 30 years, though this is our smallest house.

Heh! Everyone has incompatbilities. I expect we'll work through, of course.

I've been a musician all my life, and she knows this.

OP posts:

HaddawayAndShite · 15/01/2023 07:49

I think what OP is getting at with the instruments is, he finds it unfair and unreasonable that their partner has unilaterally said “no musical instruments” and now is unilaterally deciding to get a massive tv and put it in the living room with no discussion.

If you’re unhappy with these decisions you need to speak up OP. Talk to your partner.

Coffeellama · 15/01/2023 07:49

angelico53 · 15/01/2023 07:41

Soz - continuing.

We watch screen stuff on our laptops or on an iMac on the coffee table. Now there's talk of a 42" or bigger TV. I'd better let it all hang out: this will destroy the living room. It's ugly, dominant, will obscure a lovely view and (worse still) will be a portal for bilge to empty ino the room.

Also - background but maybe very bad, ultimately - though my partner is fine with a TV in the room, she is implacable in getting rid of any musical instrument. No guitars, even on floor stands (I won't hang an instrument on a wall) and no keyboard.

I can go to the bedroom when ithe TV's on, I guess.

But am I unreasonable to believe that this is all going wrong?

Yeah you are adults, compromise like it and just get a slightly smaller tv! Refusing to let someone have a tv in the house is unreasonable.

Original poster

angelico53 · 15/01/2023 07:50

You don't think I should sulk then?

OP posts:

Tricyrtis2022 · 15/01/2023 07:55

I'm with you there, angelico. Huge tellies are, to me, really ugly and I can't stand them.

HelpMeGetThrough · 15/01/2023 07:56

angelico53 · 15/01/2023 07:50

You don't think I should sulk then?

Not if you want to be taken seriously as an adult.

Notplayingball · 15/01/2023 07:56

Buy a larger house so you can fit in a TV in one room and a separate music room solely for your instruments.

Our instruments are split between living room (upright piano) and office space (several guitars).

CaptainMyCaptain · 15/01/2023 07:57

atteatimeeverybodyagrees · 15/01/2023 07:35

Up to you really isn't it

Exactly. What's the question.