Friend has pulled out of holiday the day before we are due to fly out

[OkIy]

Hi,

I have had a ski holiday booked with my friend for the last six weeks. She is a bit flaky but I’ve never been in this position with her. I thought she was being unusually vague about the details and my suspicions have been confirmed today.

She has just texted me saying she doesn’t think she can’t come as she has pulled a muscle during yoga earlier this week and it’s too painful. I was with her last night and there didn’t seem anything wrong with her. I think she is either making this up or is really exaggerating (she can be a bit of a hypochondriac sometimes).

I thought she had been dropping hints she might not be able to come but I triple checked before the cut off for no refunds came. She told me to go ahead.

I have paid for everything and it’s nonrefundable (we have done this multiple times in the past with no issues so I wasn’t being overly naive). I haven’t discussed this aspect with her yet as I am too upset. We are meant to fly out tomorrow.

I am not sure what to do. My birthday is on Friday as well. It wasn’t originally envisioned as a birthday weekend just a cheapish off peak break :(

Telk her she needs to pay in full as it's been spent. Ask her if she wants to come but not ski, and otherwise offer the place to others last minute, or go alone.

I would assume she can't afford it, shitty of her, she should have said that at the outset.

If you want to retain the friendship don't book anything ever again without payment up front. Personally, I'd be sacking her off.

What strikes me as strange is that this should occur after 15 years of problem-free holidays.
Has something happened recently?

Ring the holiday company/airline asap can they change the name so someone else can go with you? Is there anyone else who can go? Be quick if you want to do this.

It's going to be tough, maybe impossible to change the name on a booking with the airline at this stage but I guess it's worth asking.

I hope the OP can at least get the money she is owed.

I'd say "oh god that sucks! What a load of money down the drain, hope you can claim it back from your insurance! I'll send you any paperwork you need, your half was £3838 remember, I still need it before the flight or I'll be stranded with no food lol! I'll see you when I get back."

Because obviously she still has to pay for it and to even think ootherwise is absurd.

Tell her she can come but not ski. She still pays her share.

Of all the excuses, a pulled muscle must be up there with the worst reasons for not going on holiday.

In my opinion something else is going in here

Seriously not on, I'm sorry OP.
I'd be asking for her half now.

This is terrible! I hope you still get to go. You could look for a snow companion on the website snowheads. People often post looking for a ski buddy, they are a very friendly ski community.

OP you can totally go on your own.
If you’re having lessons you will meet people straight away.
If not then try and join at least one guided lesson and you will meet people that way. Good luck - don’t let your friend ruin your holiday.

Its very disappointing to be let down at the last minute so I can see why you are upset.

However your friend needs to pay her half, if she can’t travel she needs to claim off her insurance and if she didn’t have insurance then she only has herself to blame.

You can totally do a ski holiday on your own though! I’m done it and it’s great fun!

Your insurance only covers you.
She is unlikely to be covered for a pulled muscle. The policies are usually for cancellation in the event of serious injury, though she’d have to check the wording (if she is covered that is).

I really hope you're going to tell her to pay you back OP. If she doesnt, tell her to fuck off.

I bet she has added up the cost of lift passes and meals out and can’t afford to go. Her excuse is nonsensical. A pulled muscle? Pull the other one.

but she still needs to pay her half. It’s not fair on you.

I would post a status on social media and see if anyone is free to go!

Changing flights can cost hundreds. I had a friend get a new passport once as it was cheaper than swapping the name on the flights.

A pulled muscle could be a reason for not wanting to spend a week skiing. But to claim on insurance she will have to follow their requests and that probably means getting a GP note.
However, if she's faking - she may not want to do that. If she has a bank account with travel insurance she should be covered.
Either way, she can come on the holiday and not ski or pay you what she owes.
I hope you sort it out and have manage to have a good holiday even if you go on your own.

That’s extremely poor form on her part. And to send a message instead of making a call like a proper bloody grown up! I would pick up the phone and call her asap. You’ve not got time to lose.

Don’t beat around the bush either. Assume she is paying you in full and start with “Are you sure you can’t come because this will be an expensive cancellation for you”. It’s not your job to persuade her to come. She’s obviously decided to mull it over on her own and make the decision herself. But you must stand your ground. I’d ditch a friend immediately if they did this to me without a very very good reason.

I ended up skiing by myself years ago when a friend got sick on day 2 and it was still a good trip. Skiers are an easy bunch to make friends with, you just have to put yourself out there and chat to people on the slopes/lifts etc or join a class if you can afford it.

Totally sucks. Your friend needs to see a GP or private doctor NOW and get a note and then claim the whole lot on her insurance. Any excess she pays. If she can't/won't do that then she knows she has to suck up the cost but it leaves you in a horrible position and I can see it won't be easy to find anyone else right now. Massive sympathy

Why doesn't she really want to come?

This person is not your friend.

If I commit to a trip with someone, especially when it's their birthday, I'd be there even if my hand was falling off!

Call her, explain you're incredibly disappointed and immediately ask for her half.

If she doesn't pay, then do a small claim against her.

How shit and disappointing, I'd be raging.

She has to pay whether she goes or not, that isn't your problem and you shouldn't be out of pocket, surely she knows this?

Also, there's lots to do in these resorts other than ski - she could still enjoy all the apres ski, hot tubs, swimming, massage .....

I'd go alone - it's all paid for anyway.

She obviously still needs to pay as there is no refund, I'd make this clear. But I imagine she's going to try not to pay, and the friendship is probably over. Absolutely infuriating for you!

I don't get why anyone would be raging. Why would you want to go on holiday with someone that didn't want to be there!?

Of course the person should pay in full 100%

DO NOT OFFER to try your insurance. For one I doubt it will cover her.

as PP said, message her and say ‘such a shame, you will need to still pay your half, it’s too late to cancel for a refund now’.

i bet you anything she’ll either ignore you completely or decide, actually it’s not too bad and still go.
i had a friend try similar, thankfully she chose the latter option.

If she's been making little remarks about not being able to come before this then either she has other plans or she's short of money. I think you'll find out which as soon as you point out she still needs to pay her half.
In future I'm sure you'll make sure she pays up front or no holiday!