Friend has pulled out of holiday the day before we are due to fly out

[OkIy]

Hi,

I have had a ski holiday booked with my friend for the last six weeks. She is a bit flaky but I’ve never been in this position with her. I thought she was being unusually vague about the details and my suspicions have been confirmed today.

She has just texted me saying she doesn’t think she can’t come as she has pulled a muscle during yoga earlier this week and it’s too painful. I was with her last night and there didn’t seem anything wrong with her. I think she is either making this up or is really exaggerating (she can be a bit of a hypochondriac sometimes).

I thought she had been dropping hints she might not be able to come but I triple checked before the cut off for no refunds came. She told me to go ahead.

I have paid for everything and it’s nonrefundable (we have done this multiple times in the past with no issues so I wasn’t being overly naive). I haven’t discussed this aspect with her yet as I am too upset. We are meant to fly out tomorrow.

I am not sure what to do. My birthday is on Friday as well. It wasn’t originally envisioned as a birthday weekend just a cheapish off peak break :(

This is weird, she could still go on holiday, with a pulled muscle from yoga!

sge might not want to ski, but it actually sounds like she did/does not want to go?

you can’t get it back on insurance for a pulled muscle 😂🧐

but she’s going to right? It not a night out she’s pulling out of last minute!

Omg. Definitely call her things like this go so much better in conversation than in messages.

Make sure she understands that she has to pay you 100% for the holiday and will need to sort out her own insurance claim if a medical issue is preventing her coming.

If the money is gone anyway, could she perhaps come but not ski?!

Friend surely doesn’t need to be told by OP that it’s a problem and OP is upset? That would be completely given.

Assuming she's lieing do you suspect this is about her not having the money or something else? If it's the money would a payment plan work? I know you didn't sign up or agree to this but it sounds very probable you won't get your money and will loose your holiday and your friendship.
Say, she needs to get a Dr's cert for her insurance claim..."What? You haven't taken out jnsurance! That's gonna cost. Poor you, tell you what, you can pay me back £ per month, how's that.....you might as well still come, who know you might 'recover' quickly.
Obs going forward this completely changes the friendship.

I hope you find someone else to go with you and enjoy it x

This is incredibly selfish of her. She can still go skiing with a pulled muscle - even if she cant ski for a day or two she can still do the apres ski! She can take photos of you skiing, join you for lunch etc.

It's nothing but a very lame excuse and I'd be very upset and angry.

Did you manage to speak to her?

Bull shit -you can’t possibly pull a muscle doing yoga - it’s all gentle stretching within your capability. She doesn’t want to come so yes I’d insist on her paying anyway. CF

How upsetting for you
As you've been friends for 15 years, it's a shame she couldn't be honest
Even if she has pulled a muscle she could put a support on it and enjoy the après-ski
Hope you managed to speak to her
She needs to pay up, of course

Surely tou have travel r insurance? Tell her to get a medicsl note saying she cannot fly and cannot ski so you can get refund via insurance

Go by yourself and make sure she pays her share regardless!

She wants to get out of paying. She could still go, have meals with you, evenings together etc and mooch about, surely?

She has to pay you for her holiday. It’s that simple. It’s 100% her decision to cancel so she must forfeit the cost. If you can recover it via insurance to refund her then great but, until then, she pays up.

As she's previously promised to go on the trip, what about invoice for her share of the costs ?

I'd be sorting out her half now or at least get her to confirm preferably by text. Don't leave it until after your holiday. Point out that she can still go but just not ski. And as a last resort I'd go alone

Where is op ?

Hopefully getting ready for her holiday regardless.

According to a pp she was wrong to post here because she should be busy sorting this out instead of consulting us.

I really hope you get the money from her.

Defo still go though

She either needs to pay you in full as in a court of law any agreement on text etc is legally binding and she will be required to reimburse you via small claims, or you see if a family member will step in or another friend at a reduced price, ie if it was going to cost her 400 you charge them 250, at least it covers part of the cost and you wont be on your own

A last-minute cancellation for a holiday is honestly one of the worst things a friend can do, especially if it’s just the two of you going!! So so shitty of her. And if she has form for being flakey that just tells me she’s an unreliable friend.

I hope you enjoy the trip OP, yes make sure she pays for her half, and NEVER book anything with her again.

I had a friend like this and in the end I just cut off contact I couldn’t be bothered with the shitty treatment. Invest in your friends who are reliable and won’t let you down. And I hope you have a lovely time skiing!

I’d send her the bill for her half. And take this ad a lesson, if people say they want to go on holiday with you, then they need to pay upfront.

Are you sure she hasn’t pulled out because she can’t afford it?

Have a discussion with her about paying her half. If it turns out that she doesn’t have the money can you be okay with a payment plan where she pays you back in instalments?

When she realises that she still has to pay she might change her mind and come on holiday with you.

I hope she does the right thing and pays you back.

This is really sh1tty behaviour. I hope you are still going to go. Rubbish friend!

I just realised that you posted this yesterday, so you’re probably on your holiday now.

Hope you have a great time.