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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To bring a fizzy drink to a meal?

776 replies

mapofthechicks · 10/01/2023 19:40

So, I visited my boyfriend's family for the first time on Sunday

His mum cooked for us all. Lovely meal. When I arrived, I came with a bottle of lemonade. I said this to his mum ''I've got this, can I pop it in the fridge? Please help yourselves''

When having dinner, I asked for a glass (there were only small wine glasses on the table).

His mum said 'but we're having wine?'

I said no thanks, I'll just have some of the lemonade please'

She seemed really Confused at me!

We had a nice meal and then my boyfriend mentioned to me today 'Mum was really confused about your lemonade! Maybe don't do that next time Wink'

AIBU to think it's fine? It wasn't just for me. Anyone could've helped themselves but it was so strange. It was as if I had placed 10g of coke on the table and told everyone to help themselves to a line

Very odd indeed surely?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
AnnieSnap · 10/01/2023 20:24

phoenixrosehere · 10/01/2023 20:08

This. I don’t like the taste of plain water and all water is not the same to me. I prefer sparkling and even with that I know different brands taste different. I wouldn’t have brought my own drink to be honest and hoped a host would be able to accommodate me with something else since I highly doubt the only choices in someone’s home is water or wine and if it was, I’d find that very weird.

Show quote history

As things were though, it seems the hosts wasn’t able/willing to accommodate her!

Brefugee · 10/01/2023 20:24

She brought chocolates! If you can’t manage to read four whole sentences it’s best to keep your thoughts to yourself.

you were dragged up? she brought chocolates for everyone to eat - that's not a hostess gift. That's rude. Was it you?

saltinesandcoffeecups · 10/01/2023 20:24

HoneyDragon · 10/01/2023 20:13

My theories are

They’re panicking that you’re already pregnant and they’ve just met you. Hence not drinking.

Or they think you’re on strong antibiotics for an std.

Or they’re really really weird.

polishes happy to help badge

🤣 I’m totally picturing you with a proud face for your helpfulness

Sparklingbrook · 10/01/2023 20:24

Why stop there? Take your own dinner too.

Original poster
mapofthechicks · 10/01/2023 20:24

Luana1 · 10/01/2023 20:18

I think it's a bit odd to bring a cheap fizzy drink to someone's house, especially your new boyfriend's family who you are presumably trying to make a good first impression on. A nice bottle of lemonade like from Belvoir or such would have been ok, but 7up is to me a kids drinks so I would think it a bit weird that an adult felt they needed to bring it to a meal.

I just don't see the issue with a bottle of fizzy drink. How on earth does that impact a first impression to such an extent? Ridiculous. It's a bottle of fizzy!

OP posts:
User0610134057 · 10/01/2023 20:24

It sounds fine but sounds a bit like you brought it primarily for yourself rather than as a gift for the hostess. I also wouldn’t have specifically asked for it but just had water or something but would’ve expected my boyfriend to offer it to me

Stressfordays · 10/01/2023 20:24

Also, what kind of people host and don't have something so basic as lemonade in? I always have lemonade, coke and squash in for none drinkers. Wine, beer and gin for the drinkers (unless I know someone drinks something else like cider etc.)

floradora · 10/01/2023 20:25

bellac11 · 10/01/2023 20:18

Some people do. Some prosecco is good

Have you any idea what happens in other parts of the world where they either dont drink for religious reasons, what do you think they have at restaurants or dinners

What about in the home of prosecco, do they think its nice?

There is some massive ignorance and snobbery on this thread.

Show quote history

I know some people do, I'm trying to understand and explain the attitude of the "aghast at 7Up " hosts. Some people consider certain drinks not right with food, some people order cappuccino after dinner, some people put peas on the back of their fork and blow their nose on the napkin.
Some prosecco is good. Neither ignorant nor snobbish.

bellac11 · 10/01/2023 20:25

What does non-U mean

toastofthetown · 10/01/2023 20:25

I don't think it's rude to hand back the bottle if they don't drink 7 Up. It will almost certainly be flat by OP's next visit, so makes sense to give it back as she will enjoy it and they won't. Just like DH's GF bread always comes back with him as he's the only one who eats it.

FluffyYucca · 10/01/2023 20:25

I don’t think you’re unreasonable, but surely a good host would have checked what you wanted to drink beforehand? So there should have been no need to bring your own.

HoneyIShrunkThePizza · 10/01/2023 20:25

I would find it really strange. I wouldn't comment on it, mind it, or hold it against you but I've never had anyone turn up to the house with a plastic bottle of fizzy drink. I just can't imagine it.

Hidingawaytoday · 10/01/2023 20:26

HoneyDragon · 10/01/2023 20:13

My theories are

They’re panicking that you’re already pregnant and they’ve just met you. Hence not drinking.

Or they think you’re on strong antibiotics for an std.

Or they’re really really weird.

polishes happy to help badge

😆😆😆

I don't see the big deal, OP. I might be a bit surprised if someone turned up with a bottle of lemonade, but I certainly wouldn't have a problem with it. I used to take my own tea bags to my in laws as they only drink normal tea, and I only like fruity/herbal teas.... they did get some in themselves eventually 😆

Sparklingbrook · 10/01/2023 20:26

Stressfordays · 10/01/2023 20:24

Also, what kind of people host and don't have something so basic as lemonade in? I always have lemonade, coke and squash in for none drinkers. Wine, beer and gin for the drinkers (unless I know someone drinks something else like cider etc.)

I agree. Having only wine or water available would be a bit strange.

Solonge · 10/01/2023 20:26

You arent unreasonable. I dont drink alcohol at all. I did dry October ten years ago and never went back. I cant count the number of times dear friends and family have given me a glass of champagne, because.....its Christmas! New Year! my birthday! so you have to have a glass of fizz!!! maybe his family dont usually have wine and it was special for you. Your boyfriend is being a bit silly about it. If one of my sons came home with a new GF who wanted water, lemonade whatever and others were drinking wine I would be absolutely happy to provide. Did your DP say why you shouldnt have done that? sounds very weird to me.

Headabovetheparakeet · 10/01/2023 20:27

HoneyIShrunkThePizza · 10/01/2023 20:25

I would find it really strange. I wouldn't comment on it, mind it, or hold it against you but I've never had anyone turn up to the house with a plastic bottle of fizzy drink. I just can't imagine it.

Unimaginable, really? 😂

LaraReign · 10/01/2023 20:27

People on Mumsnet will say it's odd. It's really not.

floradora · 10/01/2023 20:27

bellac11 · 10/01/2023 20:25

What does non-U mean

Quote form Nancy Mitford ; U = people like "us" and Non-U = not like us, i.e. not of our class (the Mitfords were upper class, one embraced fascism big-time)

Feelallright · 10/01/2023 20:27

Stressfordays · 10/01/2023 20:24

Also, what kind of people host and don't have something so basic as lemonade in? I always have lemonade, coke and squash in for none drinkers. Wine, beer and gin for the drinkers (unless I know someone drinks something else like cider etc.)

I never have lemonade, Coke or squash in. I don’t know anyone who would drink them - including me. Is 7Up lemonade?

MissHavishamsMouldyOldCake · 10/01/2023 20:28

Brefugee · 10/01/2023 20:24

She brought chocolates! If you can’t manage to read four whole sentences it’s best to keep your thoughts to yourself.

you were dragged up? she brought chocolates for everyone to eat - that's not a hostess gift. That's rude. Was it you?

Bringing chocolates but not specifying that they're solely to be consumed by the boyfriend's mother is rude?

Mmmkay.

ShandaLear · 10/01/2023 20:29

If my son brought a girl home and she wanted to drink some lemonade she’d brought I’d have offered her a glass before she’d had to ask for it. The mother sounds like Hyacinth Bouquet. She was probably passing round the Blue Nun.

Sparklingbrook · 10/01/2023 20:29

Feelallright · 10/01/2023 20:27

I never have lemonade, Coke or squash in. I don’t know anyone who would drink them - including me. Is 7Up lemonade?

Show quote history

I don't have Lemonade or coke in all the time but if I was hosting I'd definitely get some in because I know other people do., and it's nice for them to have a choice.

Stressfordays · 10/01/2023 20:29

Feelallright · 10/01/2023 20:27

I never have lemonade, Coke or squash in. I don’t know anyone who would drink them - including me. Is 7Up lemonade?

Show quote history

Not even if you're having people round? I find that bizarre. Some people don't drink alcohol for all sorts of reasons so I always accommodate.

Cuwins · 10/01/2023 20:29

Welpthereitis · 10/01/2023 20:22

I have been told by friends not to bring wine as I don’t drink it or any alcohol I have absolutely no idea and on more than one occasion I have pick the most horrible tasting wine ever as my friend told me 🤣🤣🤷‍♀️so no I won’t be taking wine to anyone ever again they have absolutely no problem with me bringing the fizzy drinks

This would be me! I wouldn't have a clue where to start choosing- literally all I know about wine is it comes in red and white! I have a feeling people keep one in the fridge and one not but I'm not sure which way round.

Headabovetheparakeet · 10/01/2023 20:30

This happened in Billericay? Now I'm imagining it as a scene in Abigail's Party.

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