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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell DH to ride for Deliveroo in the evenings?

372 replies

Stackss · 09/01/2023 18:34

Like everyone at the moment, we are struggling a bit with the cost of living. We aren't poor by any means (both in middle class jobs) but tbh we have overstretched ourselves wrt our mortgage and private school for 2 DC.

DH has always had his head in the sand when it comes to finances and assured me we could afford the mortgage and private school- and tbf we could prior to the current situation. DH is not willing to countenance any budget cuts such as looking at cheaper areas or state schools.

Frankly we need to bring in extra money to continue to afford our current lifestyle. WIBU to tell DH he will need to get out on his bike and do food deliveries for Deliveroo and Uber Eats to bring in funds if he isn't willing to cut back?

OP posts:
Aleaiactaest · 09/01/2023 20:03

What are you going to do if Labour gets in and slaps an extra 20 per cent Vat onto school fees? If you are struggling now, I would be rethinking the whole private school thing. If that happens, all state schools will be full with desperate private school parents scrambling about. I already have several colleagues planning a move to Dubai because of it and the high taxes here. Trying to get out whilst their house still has some value.

Coucous · 09/01/2023 20:03

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

MiddleParking · 09/01/2023 20:04

Aleaiactaest · 09/01/2023 20:03

What are you going to do if Labour gets in and slaps an extra 20 per cent Vat onto school fees? If you are struggling now, I would be rethinking the whole private school thing. If that happens, all state schools will be full with desperate private school parents scrambling about. I already have several colleagues planning a move to Dubai because of it and the high taxes here. Trying to get out whilst their house still has some value.

Seems a bit unlikely before OP’s currently year 11 twins leave school.

LuckeyBuoy · 09/01/2023 20:04

Roundabout78 · 09/01/2023 19:48

Ooooh is this the same poster?!

Show quote history

She's on a troll roll.

hennylovespens · 09/01/2023 20:04

PollyAmour · 09/01/2023 18:55

Do Deliveroo really use cyclists to deliver stuff? I'd be pissed off at having to wait for my food. I want it delivered by motorbike or car, quickly. I'm hungry!

If you live in a city bikes are often faster than cars. Motorbikes probably faster but they're stuck in one way systems and LTNs the bikes can ignore more easily.

Coucous · 09/01/2023 20:05

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

SeasonFinale · 09/01/2023 20:06

Aleaiactaest · 09/01/2023 20:03

What are you going to do if Labour gets in and slaps an extra 20 per cent Vat onto school fees? If you are struggling now, I would be rethinking the whole private school thing. If that happens, all state schools will be full with desperate private school parents scrambling about. I already have several colleagues planning a move to Dubai because of it and the high taxes here. Trying to get out whilst their house still has some value.

VAT on school fees won't happen because it would push too many back into the state system and cost far more than the income it would bring in. The drop in figures would cause smaller less wealthy indies to fold further putting kids back into the state system and costing the state more. Its why it never happens.

SuperHandss · 09/01/2023 20:06

abracady · 09/01/2023 18:41

Why don't you do it?

Why him?

Read the post. She’s happy to cut back elsewhere.

redskydelight · 09/01/2023 20:07

Stackss · 09/01/2023 19:54

@Maireas

The grandparents will be funding the exam bonuses for the twins.

Wouldn't it make more sense for the grandparents to contribute this money towards the school fees, so DH doesn't have to get a second job?

daemonologie · 09/01/2023 20:07

Have you got cars you can downsize? If you've got an suv get a ten year old corsa

Trez1510 · 09/01/2023 20:07

Coffeellama · 09/01/2023 20:01

Not really worth working it out considering the grandparents are paying that.

Show quote history

Yeah, cross post!

I'm now wondering if the grandparents provided a finite budget or OP just told them to what she and the twins had agreed?

Still 25 hours per week revision for GCSEs? Folks have achieved 1:1's on much less revision if they're bright enough .....

solomam · 09/01/2023 20:07

Stackss · 09/01/2023 19:54

@Maireas

The grandparents will be funding the exam bonuses for the twins.

Oh right. I saw this thread. So that money is really coming from the bank of (your) mum and dad then, and not you and DH?

Nocutenamesleft · 09/01/2023 20:07

Wait….your bribing your children who are in private school to do well in Exams?!?!

surely private school do that without bribing?£?

isn’t that what’s your paying for!£?!?! Hahahahahahaha

Aleaiactaest · 09/01/2023 20:07

@Coucous - well Brexit wasn’t meant to happen either and it has been all downhill from there with the pound tanking gradually. So smart people don’t panic but plan ahead.

Krakenes · 09/01/2023 20:08

OP, how are you planning to bring extra money in?

SpanishSalsaing · 09/01/2023 20:09

Are you both paying 40% tax? The £6 an hour he might make after tax won't go very far where school fees are concerned.

CrazyLadie · 09/01/2023 20:11

onesadmama · 09/01/2023 19:02

But you need to pay tax and ni om this also. Presumably since you're able to afford private school you'll be both in the 40% maybe 50% tax bracket.

You'll lose 50% of that £800 to deductibles

Show quote history

If its a second job its even higher tax, if you work in one of the lower brackets I know that for a second job ya pay 30% not 20%

SD1978 · 09/01/2023 20:12

Do you currently work also? Any chance of increasing your hours, if your asking your husband to get a second job?

Whatistheanswer2023 · 09/01/2023 20:13

SeasonFinale · 09/01/2023 20:06

VAT on school fees won't happen because it would push too many back into the state system and cost far more than the income it would bring in. The drop in figures would cause smaller less wealthy indies to fold further putting kids back into the state system and costing the state more. Its why it never happens.

Show quote history

With bells on!! It won’t happen. It never has. Because as PP said it’ll cost more than it gains.

Redblanky · 09/01/2023 20:14

CrazyLadie · 09/01/2023 20:11

If its a second job its even higher tax, if you work in one of the lower brackets I know that for a second job ya pay 30% not 20%

Show quote history

No you don't.

MarshaBradyo · 09/01/2023 20:14

Whatistheanswer2023 · 09/01/2023 20:13

With bells on!! It won’t happen. It never has. Because as PP said it’ll cost more than it gains.

Show quote history

Hope you’re all right on this one. Crazy idea

Trez1510 · 09/01/2023 20:15

Krakenes · 09/01/2023 20:08

OP, how are you planning to bring extra money in?

I suspect OP will be too busy patrolling the hall, ruler in hand, overseeing 'the revision' to be able to contribute further to the household (and Bank of Mum &Dad) income .....

Poor Mr Stackss, out in all weathers, with his wee Deliveroo sign on his bike, being spotted by the twins' classmates/peers ....

That's an entire new thread in the making right there, is it not? 😉

bonzaitree · 09/01/2023 20:15

Tricky one.

With my OH I tell him the facts and say “Im not sure what to do. Can you help me solve this?” And leave it with him. Then after a week I raise it again.

Obv I already know the answer!! But sometimes putting the ball in his court is the easiest way to deal with it.

TBF sometimes he comes up with amazing solutions that I haven’t thought about!

LimeCheesecake · 09/01/2023 20:15

If your dcs are year 11 now, then can you switch to an internet only mortgage or take a mortgage break for a year to just get through until the summer?

to add if your dcs need to move to the state sector for 6th form, be aware they need to be applying v soon, round here they need to have applied by end of January. I would get an application in and say you can review once they have their GCSEs in the summer.

Stompythedinosaur · 09/01/2023 20:16

This is beyond ridiculous as a suggestion.