WARNING. Very long post! 😬 @Crankitcrew YANBU at all.
Me and DH live in a social housing bungalow and have done for 7 years - a 2 bed one. We got a 2 bed because our DC was living with us when we got it. They left not long after, but were still living with us when we moved in/signed the tenancy agreement.
We have lived together 34-ish years, (since 1988.) We rented a one bed HA flat in summer 1988,. It looked like 2 semi detached houses, but was in fact, 2 upstairs flats and 1 big downstairs one. We stayed 4 years, and absolutely loved it.
There was a couple downstairs with one child who had a 2 bed flat. Next door to us was a couple 20 years older than us (middle aged) and they were hardly ever in. It was five minutes walk to the shops, 10 minutes walk to bus stop, GP, dentist etc. LOVED it. Just pay the rent and everything is covered...Repairs, insurances, everything. (Only had to pay home contents.)
We only moved (and bought a 2 bed semi detached starter home,) because everyone around us was buying, and renting was considered 'dead money,' and you were considered (by some) to be something of a failure if you rented (We now know that is bullshit!) We were both young and impressionable, and easily swayed then, and thought buying a house was the thing to do, and would make us better people, and look more successful etc... (I know dumb right?!)
We rented the 1 bed flat for £175 a month - (this was in the early 1990s.) The mortgage was around £350 a month for the 2 bed semi......£350 a month 30 years ago, is probably like £800 now. (The £175 rent was like £400 now, so it was a huge increase.) We had both grown up on council estates and had NEVER experienced being a homeowner mortgage owner!
We regretted it quite quickly when one thing after another started going wrong with the house, and we had to pay 1000s of pounds out. We didn't have any savings as we had spent them all on the deposit, and solicitors fees, and land and mining searches etc etc, and our income took a hit because the mortgage was double the rent.
In addition to paying double the rent (for the mortgage,) along with additional insurances, like unemployment insurance, and life insurance etc, we had to fork out for every little thing from the leaky garage roof, to new windows, a new kitchen, new front door, new 60 foot long fence, and the removal of 36 fifteen foot conifers.
We could not get 'full cover' bricks and mortar insurance until we removed them, as the insurance companies were still licking their wounds after the 1987 hurricane. So as we had no money spare, we took out a loan, and then used the credit cards a lot more, and were 1000s in debt before we realised it. We had never been in debt before and it was horrible...
We lived in the 2 bed semi for 5 years, then new neighbours moved in who were utterly vile (long story,) and it also became too small after having DC, so we bought a 3 bed, which was about 10% more in cost at the time. It had an extra bedroom but no garage or carport like our last house, and the garden was much smaller, hence the price not being much different.. Again, we spent 1000s and 1000s of pounds doing necessary repairs that we didn't realise would need doing when we bought the house!
The house value increased from the £45,000 we paid, to about £85,000 over about 5-8 years, and we were offered the chance to take equity out, and extend the mortgage term - which we did. We took £30,000, and paid off all our debts. Car loan, bank loans, credit card debts, overdrafts etc. We had not gone crazy buying luxury goods, we used credit because we didn't have enough income to keep paying out for the bloody house repairs!
So over some 13-14 years, we somehow accrued £30,000 of debt. (£7,000 of that was a car loan.) After another 4 or 5 years, we found ourselves still struggling to make ends meet, as the house had an ever open mouth, and every time we had a low income month, we had more outgoings than income again. We had another bunch of debt within 5 to 6 years, though not as high. (A few thousand.)
About a mile from the little cul de sac we lived, was an estate owned mostly by council and HA, (a few were 'right to buy,' but only about 10%,) and I was sooooooo envious of the people there - getting cheap rent, repairs done for free, new windows, doors, kitchen, driveway, garage door, etc etc, decorating and carpet allowance, rent paid if they couldn't work/weren't working, or if they lost their job. (That is SUCH an amazing safety net.)
Whenever DH was off work for 2-3 months at a time (which happened quite a few times due to illness/sickness/operations/surgeries,) we had no-one to pay our mortgage, we just fell really behind and further and further into debt. The people in social housing seemed to be happier too, with less debts/often no debts, less money issues, better cars, bigger holidays etc (NOT a stab at people in social housing by the way, I was just really envious and thought they were so lucky and wished I were them, but bore no malice or hatred at all.)
tl;dr ... For various reasons, after 21-22 years of being homeowners mortgage owners we sold our house, paid off anything that was owing, with the bit of equity we had left, (about £10,000 was left I think,) and then went into private let. (A small 3 bed cottage for £500 a month.)
No repairs, no maintenance, and we knew we would get money towards the rent if our income dropped or one of us lost our job. Went onto the housing list, and after 5 years of waiting and bidding we dropped lucky and got a little 2 bed bungalow. It came just in time, as the woman was selling the cottage! We got a lifetime tenancy!!!
Our bungalow was built in the late 1990s, it has a garage and a car port, and is a big end plot with no-one at the side, just the woodlands at the end of a 100 foot long garden. (It's housing association and is £350 a month. Was £335 when we started renting, but has risen a bit over 7 years.) All repairs done within DAYS sometimes, not usually more than 2-3 weeks, and we don't have to pay for repairs and maintenance. (And we have the safety net of rent being paid if we cannot pay it.)
We have paid full rent since we came here, but knowing we have a safety net is amazing.
Also, we have never been so comfortable financially. DH dropped his hours to 26 a week in 2021, and I work 18 a week. We are on about 10% above minimum wage, and we still manage (some months) to have around £500 to £600 a month surplus income........ That never happened when we were homeowners. DH worked full time then, and I worked 26 hours a week, and we seemed to have a shortfall of a few hundred some months.
You could not PAY us to buy again.
We have had the odd snide remark from people - like 'why do you rent, it's so silly!' And we just say 'it suits us, we don't have to explain.' At nearly 60, we have no hesitation in telling people to mind their own business. In our 20s we were not as assertive and vocal.
I know people have different experiences and different views, but being a homeowner mortgage owner did us no favours - ever. We should NEVER have bought, we should have ignored people, and stuck with renting a housing association property.
As some people have said, you cannot guarantee never losing your home, even if you buy, as you don't know if you will lose your job and income some time in the future.
And there is NO guarantee that you will be able to leave the house to your children, as you are fairly likely to have to sell it to fund your care!