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Original poster

Would you find this odd to say to a 6yo?

157 replies

Goldsnow · 02/01/2023 02:36

A 6 year old female child in her house with her family (twin brother, mum and dad). The daughter is playing wearing her pants (joggers) with no vest or top on. The father then tells her to put a top on as she should not be running around like that. The house was warm so it wasn't that. It was because she is female that is the reason he was telling her she shouldn't do that and to put a top or vest on.

Would you find this strange for a man/father to say to a 6 year old or not? I would have thought a little child of that age is fine in her own home without wearing a top and I wouldn't have given it a second thought. But maybe that is just me.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 02/01/2023 05:56

Aubree17 · 02/01/2023 05:11

He's absolutely right.
Where now it's harmless, it's setting the right standard of behaviour for the future.

Children naturally start to think about privacy as they age. No need to treat girls differently at 6 FFS.

And DD thinks shirtless boys and men are yucky and cannot understand the double standards. Neither can I honestly. Sweaty, shirtless men in the summer? Yuk.

Original poster
Goldsnow · 02/01/2023 15:19

Mixed responses. Thank you all. I didn't say anything but it has been at the back of my mind so I wanted to hear the opinions of others.

OP posts:
FantaFour · 02/01/2023 15:25

OldFan · 02/01/2023 02:55

@Goldsnow Women's top halves are sexualised whereas men's aren't. So girls need to learn it's appropriate to cover that area.

This. I would tell my 6yo dd the same thing. Although I would do the same to my son tbh

PrincessNakatomi · 02/01/2023 15:25

I think posters are deliberately missing the point that this is a father who has different standards of dressing behaviour for his kids based on their sex.

He is teaching his dd that she is to expect different instructions on how much of her body she can show when compared to her brother.

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 02/01/2023 15:27

God this thread is depressing. She's a 6 year old in her own house with her parents and twin brother, not a 24 year old running around top less in a bar ffs. The fact that her dad saw her without a top on and automatically went straight to thinking sexually is just grim on his part

BrownEyedGhoul · 02/01/2023 15:39

OldFan · 02/01/2023 02:55

@Goldsnow Women's top halves are sexualised whereas men's aren't. So girls need to learn it's appropriate to cover that area.

At 6 years old they are fucking not!

But thank you for stating the issue of the OP so clearly, if disgustingly

Sohungryyyy · 02/01/2023 15:41

She’s 6!

Still a little girl and just playing in her own home, I wouldn’t like it personally (him saying that)
The only reason I’d say to put a top on is because it’s January and freezing (well is on our house) are you sure it wasn’t just that?

Newuser82 · 02/01/2023 15:42

I just think everyone is different. My husband doesn't like the kids running round in underwear or naked or whatever, it doesn't bother me at all if it's just us in the house. So when he is there they know they need clothes on.

catandcoffee · 02/01/2023 15:45

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 02/01/2023 15:27

God this thread is depressing. She's a 6 year old in her own house with her parents and twin brother, not a 24 year old running around top less in a bar ffs. The fact that her dad saw her without a top on and automatically went straight to thinking sexually is just grim on his part

Absolutely agree with this. Your husband has a real problem...with his mind.

Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 02/01/2023 15:45

I have a 6 year old daughter who we et play in pants/too less if it is just family at home. However I don’t find the comment odd. I suppose there are social norms and, rightly or wrongly, women covering their chest is a social norm.

I assume you will expect her to cover her chest when she is getting towards puberty. Perhaps your husband is starting to enforce those social normals earlier than you might choose to.

I agree it’s a little sad she can’t play like that, but I don’t think I’d call it “odd”.

Mabelface · 02/01/2023 15:46

At 6, it's not unusual to run round in just your pants or less! She's doesn't have breasts, is currently the same shape as her brother and its not inappropriate at all for her to be in her own home, with her own family with no top on.

RhymeHasAReason · 02/01/2023 15:48

If my children’s father sexualised them, he could fuck off.

SassySheila · 02/01/2023 15:50

I've found that making young females cover their top half is a very British thing. Go to any European country and it's considered normal for little girls to be running around in just knickers.

Luredbyapomegranate · 02/01/2023 15:52

PandasAreBlackAndWhite · 02/01/2023 02:47

Well it's not appropriate in many other settings is it? If it made the father uncomfortable he has the right to say so. I wouldn't let my DD be semi naked even at home, sudden visitors would embarrass her.

This kid is six. She doesn’t have any breast development. It’s as fine for her to run around with her top off at home as it is on a beach.

He is being odd.

Jimboscott0115 · 02/01/2023 15:52

While I agree it's not a big deal a 6 year old of either sex being topless , I'm not sure it's anything to worry about either. I'd say it's more than likely something subconscious in your partner and nothing a grown up conversation can't easily resolve.

Suedomin · 02/01/2023 15:52

If he told the girl to cover up he should also tell the boy.

Abouttimemum · 02/01/2023 15:54

I’m not keen on my son not wearing a top tbh indoors or outdoors. I don’t like seeing grown men with their tops off either. Doesn’t mean anything other than the fact I think people should wear clothes!

Abouttimemum · 02/01/2023 15:55

But yea if that’s his problem he should be saying the same to his son too

Michiru · 02/01/2023 15:56

OP, from speaking to a few males aged 30-45, some men are becoming incredibly cautious about young girls and women, even if it is close friends or family. I know a few men who do everything they reasonably can to not be alone with young girls or women, and who would likely react like that, for fear of being labelled perverts or, worse, accused of something untoward.

Even one of my gay friends is like that now. I wonder whether your brother reacted like that for similar reasons?

Sohungryyyy · 02/01/2023 15:57

I thought it was ops husband? The father of the child

Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 02/01/2023 15:58

out Of interest at what age would people start asking their daughters to wear tops in their homes?

NotAHouse · 02/01/2023 15:58

OldFan · 02/01/2023 02:55

@Goldsnow Women's top halves are sexualised whereas men's aren't. So girls need to learn it's appropriate to cover that area.

So close...

RhymeHasAReason · 02/01/2023 15:59

Michiru · 02/01/2023 15:56

OP, from speaking to a few males aged 30-45, some men are becoming incredibly cautious about young girls and women, even if it is close friends or family. I know a few men who do everything they reasonably can to not be alone with young girls or women, and who would likely react like that, for fear of being labelled perverts or, worse, accused of something untoward.

Even one of my gay friends is like that now. I wonder whether your brother reacted like that for similar reasons?

Wtf?

I hope the thread is real. But it’s sure to attract some weirdos .

Rainallnight · 02/01/2023 15:59

pelargoniums · 02/01/2023 03:11

She’s six and at home with her family, it’s perfectly appropriate to run around with no top on. And also appropriate at the beach or pool or splash park, or anywhere a six-year-old boy would also be topless. She’s six: no one should be sexualising her top half.

Show quote history

This

GuinnessLover · 02/01/2023 16:00

Some weird opinions on a 6yo being topless in her own house on this thread...