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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

15 year old drinking in my house

110 replies

Wheelerdeeler · 30/12/2022 22:20

My family were here for a meal this evening. My brother and sil offered their 15 year old son a beer. He had 2.

I didn't say anything because it was a celebration for my parents so I didn't want to cause tension.

Would this bother you?

Yabu - not your son not your business

Yanbu - not on to encourage a 15 year old to drink in someone else's house

OP posts:
CiderJolly · 30/12/2022 22:23

I think it’s ok with a meal/food occasionally. Not really your business. It would be different if they were condoning him getting drunk.

troppibambini6 · 30/12/2022 22:25

Absolutely fine.

Hadjab · 30/12/2022 22:28

Was he inebriated? Did he finish the two beers then demand more? Did he have to be carried to the car? If the answer to any of those questions is no, then YABU. 15 year olds are going to drink. I let my soon to be 16 year old have a drink occasionally, because I don’t want her to get into that mentality of thinking you need to get smashed to have a good time, and that alcohol should be treated with respect.

Dogsgottabone · 30/12/2022 22:29

I would have offered him one first!

Anyone over 14 at a family meal would be offered a drink.

FindingMeno · 30/12/2022 22:29

Wouldn't bother me at all.
He's 15 and they were hardly snorting coke with £20's.

JockTamsonsBairns · 30/12/2022 22:30

I have a 15yo DS and have offered him a glass of beer over Xmas. He's said no on both occasions, but I would have been fine if he'd said yes. It's two beers on a special occasion, in a family environment. There's no issue as far as I can see. I wouldn't be happy if he was in a park with his mates, getting hammered on neat spirits - but this isn't that.

RegularNameChangerVersion21 · 30/12/2022 22:31

This wouldn't bother me. I wouldn't be offering someone else's 15 year old a beer myself but if his parents are OK with him having a couple of beers with some food that's fine.

thaegumathteth · 30/12/2022 22:32

No this wouldn't even remotely bother me

ApolloandDaphne · 30/12/2022 22:34

This wouldn't even cross my radar as being an issue. At 15 he is old enough to have a couple of beers.

NancyJoan · 30/12/2022 22:35

Do you have a teen?
Did you drink as a teen?

ShakeYourFeathers · 30/12/2022 22:38

Yabu- not remotely an issue. 2 pints of beer on New Year's Eve Eve with family. My parents offered me the same at that age. As was the norm with my friends and family.

elevenplusdilemma · 30/12/2022 22:39

I wouldn't bother me at all unless he was inebriated or behaving inappropriately on account of the alcohol consumption.
There's nothing wrong with letting teens have a sensible drink with a meal now and again (it's legal to do so). I probably would've only let a 15 year old have one beer though.

jackstini · 30/12/2022 22:42

Very normal, would not have batted an eyelid at 2 beers for a 15yo - much better to sample their first few alcoholic drinks at home with family than out with friends

What are your concerns?

PeskyYeti · 30/12/2022 22:44

I would have offered it. Perfectly normal.

Focalpoint · 30/12/2022 22:57

Would really bother me.

DumpedByText · 30/12/2022 23:16

My 15 year old DD had a glass of prosecco with Christmas Dinner and a couple of gins later on. In moderation I don't see the issue.

MirandaWest · 30/12/2022 23:18

Do you have children and if so how old?

Mine are 19 and 17. Would have offered both of them a drink at 15. DS would probably have said yes and DD probably no.

Original poster
Wheelerdeeler · 30/12/2022 23:21

NancyJoan · 30/12/2022 22:35

Do you have a teen?
Did you drink as a teen?

I have a teen 1 year younger

We were offered a drink at home from about 17 I think

I have no issue with what they do in their own home. Although I do think encouraging a 15 year to drink is not necessary.

I have an issue with it happening in someone else's house ie mine. I think it's inconsiderate.

OP posts:
NewNovember · 30/12/2022 23:24

Inconsiderate why on earth would you think that?

W0tnow · 30/12/2022 23:26

I don’t let my 15 year old son drink, but if this kid’s parents were there then 🤷‍♀️. He’s their son.

Original poster
Wheelerdeeler · 30/12/2022 23:29

NewNovember · 30/12/2022 23:24

Inconsiderate why on earth would you think that?

Because I have a 14 year old and he won't be encouraged to drink at 15.

I can't believe so many of you have no issues with a 15 year old drinking, when at someone else's house.

OP posts:
Lonelylonelylonely · 30/12/2022 23:31

I wouldn't be worried by moderate alcohol consumption under parental supervision. It's a couple of beers, not a teen getting slaughtered with their mates.

CrapBucket · 30/12/2022 23:33

For me it depends on who bought the beer?!

I occasionally offer my teens cider/wine/beer, but tbh a bottle of pop is a LOT cheaper and I'm not made of money. So it varies with me depending on my financial budget.

kimchifix · 30/12/2022 23:34

I wouldn't be bothered - I don't make a habit of it but DD is nearly 16 and has had a couple of glasses of fizz over Xmas. In the past when my DS was 15 and on holiday with a slightly younger friend I think we did discuss what was acceptable re having the odd with his parents. Perhaps that would have been more considerate of them, especially since it turns out you have strong views on the matter and don't want to encourage your son.

kimchifix · 30/12/2022 23:35

Odd beer that should say.