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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wont stop asking!

852 replies

Castleontheisland · 28/12/2022 05:05

Name changed for this as my other threads are quite outing. Sorry its long!

Me and partner are away for a few days over Christmas, our next door neighbour has a spare key for our house for emergencies (we have their spare house key as well). We are not close friends just normal neighbours, They have had family visiting over Christmas/new year. On boxing day they text me and asked if some of their family could sleep in our home as more of the family had arrive unexpectedly! We said no because beds need changing and heating not on etc.(also I dont want strangers in my home)Well since then we have had text after text asking over and over again! I have also repeatedly tried to ring them but they are not picking up! The last one was very late last night (I was already in bed asleep)asking again and saying the family who they want to stay's car has broken down! I feel like packing up here and going home now as so worried they will just use my house anyway! I dont have any friends or family nearby who can check on my home. My partner has said they surely wont just use our house but I'm not sure they wont. 😥

OP posts:
Wakk · 28/12/2022 09:38

I think it's a bit pointless getting your sister to check in a few hours. They'll have made breakfast and be long gone by then.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 28/12/2022 09:42
Hmm
Ursuladevine · 28/12/2022 09:44

We are not close friends just normal neighbours

I cannot get my head around giving keys to my neighbours simply on the grounds that I live next to them rather than on the much more sensible grounds that I know them very well, like them a great deal and, most importantly, deeply trust them

ButterBastardBeans · 28/12/2022 09:47

This would make me flip! They'll be looking through all your personal belongings and paper work. WTF is wrong with people nowadays?

dexterslockedintheshedagain · 28/12/2022 09:47

That's your HOME!!!! I am livid on your behalf, OP. How dare they even THINK that would be acceptable????!!!!

Zonder · 28/12/2022 09:48

At least you know not to leave a key with them again!

Hobbesmanc · 28/12/2022 09:48

@Squiblet

But it's not the actual neighbours. It's family of theirs that have turned up.

GrasstrackGirl · 28/12/2022 09:49

You're leaving it far too late to check, they'll be long gone by then.

Mummyoflittledragon · 28/12/2022 09:54

I agree that they’ve allowed people to stay. I hope they haven’t damaged anything.

SallyAny · 28/12/2022 09:55

Hope they’re not in your house… so rude

emptythelitterbox · 28/12/2022 09:55

They are the cheekiest of CF.

Tally up the expense of changing your locks.
House clean
Any damages

Also get a ring bell installed.

And give it to them for violating your home and trust.

I suspect it was their plan to have relatives stay in your home.

I do wonder if something was damaged, gone missing, otherwise they'd have just done it and not told you.

I had something similar happen when I was overseas and couldn't get back.

Someone from a local fb group volunteered to go knock on the door to see if they were there.
He just went and knocked asking about lawn service.
It was brilliant.

Stravaig · 28/12/2022 10:00

Coffeetree · 28/12/2022 06:41

I would be tempted to mess with them by texting: "Our security cameras are showing an intruder. Have you noticed anything?"

And 'We've forwarded the footage on to the police.'

Wallstick · 28/12/2022 10:00

I don't know where people get their front from. I wish I had a fraction of this confidence. I can't believe I feel bad about certain things and other people use their neighbours house as a B&B.

lightcurtains · 28/12/2022 10:01

emptythelitterbox · 28/12/2022 09:55

They are the cheekiest of CF.

Tally up the expense of changing your locks.
House clean
Any damages

Also get a ring bell installed.

And give it to them for violating your home and trust.

I suspect it was their plan to have relatives stay in your home.

I do wonder if something was damaged, gone missing, otherwise they'd have just done it and not told you.

I had something similar happen when I was overseas and couldn't get back.

Someone from a local fb group volunteered to go knock on the door to see if they were there.
He just went and knocked asking about lawn service.
It was brilliant.

This is also a good option. Cheeky sods!!!

Nicnak2223 · 28/12/2022 10:04

Castleontheisland · 28/12/2022 08:42

Good god I never knew this! I thought I was being a good neighbour. Definitely getting the keys back and changing all the locks.

Show quote history

I can't understand what emergency your neighbours need a key for? How would it make you a good neighbour?

Obvious your neighbors are beyond cheeky fuckers but still!

FOJN · 28/12/2022 10:04

Norfolkungood · 28/12/2022 09:26

Makes me wonder if this was their plan all along OP if you'd told them in advance when you were going away. To use your house as extra space to accommodate their guests. Who has relatives turn up unexpectedly at Christmas time if they have no guarantee they'll have somewhere to stay?

I agree. No one turns up needing overnight accommodation without checking first.

Scottishskifun · 28/12/2022 10:06

Jesus this is Cf of the highest order!

Get the key back and install a keybox don't give CF neighbours the code but its there incase in future you need something checked on.

Original poster
Castleontheisland · 28/12/2022 10:08

Norfolkungood · 28/12/2022 09:26

Makes me wonder if this was their plan all along OP if you'd told them in advance when you were going away. To use your house as extra space to accommodate their guests. Who has relatives turn up unexpectedly at Christmas time if they have no guarantee they'll have somewhere to stay?

Last week I posted Christmas cardthrough a few of the neighbours doors and she was coming out of her house at the same time Ivwas going up her path.
We sort of asked each other about Christmas plans so she knows we were going away for a week and she told my her family were coming to visit over Christmas.

OP posts:
Moveoverdarlin · 28/12/2022 10:10

This utterly outrageous. They could be in there with the heating cranked up, eating your food, they might have got the key cut. You leave a spare key for times when you’re locked out, or can’t get home to feed the cat. I would go up the fucking wall at this!!!

HowzAboutIt · 28/12/2022 10:10

Xmas really brings the nutty behaviour of people out doesnt it.

YANBU! They are mad to keep asking 😳

Inkpotlover · 28/12/2022 10:13

HowzAboutIt · 28/12/2022 10:10

Xmas really brings the nutty behaviour of people out doesnt it.

YANBU! They are mad to keep asking 😳

I think they keep asking because they've already been using OP's house and something has happened, like a breakage, and they now need her permission so they can pretend the incident/breakage occurred AFTER she let them stay, not before. They are clearly panicking given the bombardment of messages plus the fact they won't pick up calls now.

Littlebluedinosaur · 28/12/2022 10:15

This is the worst CF thing I’ve read!

Inkpotlover · 28/12/2022 10:16

Castleontheisland · 28/12/2022 10:08

Last week I posted Christmas cardthrough a few of the neighbours doors and she was coming out of her house at the same time Ivwas going up her path.
We sort of asked each other about Christmas plans so she knows we were going away for a week and she told my her family were coming to visit over Christmas.

Show quote history

I know you're going to wait until your sister etc can go round later, but I would be inclined to mess with their heads a bit and would send another text saying: 'Have you let your relatives stay in my house despite us saying absolutely no way? Because I've just been told you have.' Then see what they reply.

For all they know, another neighbour could've contacted you.

July70 · 28/12/2022 10:17

Only our adult children and their family have keys to our property and we to theirs, we trust each other and I would not give anyone lese the keys.

I don't even want my in-laws checking the outside as they make it so obivious we are away and a friend offered we said no thanks

Next door, detached house from us - the couple, will glance over to make sure no leaflets pacels sticking out and that is it

we leave the heating on in winter if away for several hours, a night or more

we have those automatic lights on the inside in some of the ebdroom

Puzzledandpissedoff · 28/12/2022 10:17

Send a taxi round, get the driver to knock on the door and tell you if anyone answers

I was about to suggest the same, except I see you've already made arrangements for someone to visit ... useful for a repeat check though?

I'd expect them not picking up the phone is precisely so they can claim they didn't hear from you and "thought you wouldn't mind", but definitely get those keys back