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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wont stop asking!

852 replies

Castleontheisland · 28/12/2022 05:05

Name changed for this as my other threads are quite outing. Sorry its long!

Me and partner are away for a few days over Christmas, our next door neighbour has a spare key for our house for emergencies (we have their spare house key as well). We are not close friends just normal neighbours, They have had family visiting over Christmas/new year. On boxing day they text me and asked if some of their family could sleep in our home as more of the family had arrive unexpectedly! We said no because beds need changing and heating not on etc.(also I dont want strangers in my home)Well since then we have had text after text asking over and over again! I have also repeatedly tried to ring them but they are not picking up! The last one was very late last night (I was already in bed asleep)asking again and saying the family who they want to stay's car has broken down! I feel like packing up here and going home now as so worried they will just use my house anyway! I dont have any friends or family nearby who can check on my home. My partner has said they surely wont just use our house but I'm not sure they wont. 😥

OP posts:
Womencanlift · 28/12/2022 09:09

Agree with others that they have already done it hence the multiple calls and made up stories. Get home as quick as you can and get them to pay for any expenses (including another night away to make up for leaving early)

B1993 · 28/12/2022 09:12

Op, you’ve absolutely done the right thing standing firm on not letting their visitors stay! Who’d want randomers in their house while they are not there?! I’m surprised that they’d even suggest this, it’s crazy. I couldn’t imagine a stranger sleeping in my bed… 🤢🤮

I really hope they haven’t gone behind your back and used the spare key to help themselves. Speaking of, it might be more sensible to get one of those key boxes that you attach to the outside of your house. In an emergency, you can give a neighbour/friend/family member the code to get the key.

trulyunruly01 · 28/12/2022 09:13

@weddinglovepure Once you have registered with Mumsnet, choose the closest subject from the Topics list then click on New to start a thread of your own.

daisychain01 · 28/12/2022 09:15

Melon9 · 28/12/2022 06:03

This is terrible.

If you say roughly where you live OP I bet there's someone who would go to check and take a video. I would!

You can't be serious!! Way to go, let's all get to know where the OP lives shall we, great security not.

OP please regain control of your home, and remember it has serious implications on your household insurance ie it could be declined if something were to happen and your insurance company get to know random people were being given access inside your property.

Squiblet · 28/12/2022 09:18

Hobbesmanc · 28/12/2022 09:07

They're complete strangers. Why would you let randoms sleep in your house when you aren't there. With your valuables and personal stuff,

if you can't see that as an issue you're either very naive or just posting drivel. Or nine years old.

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But if they're total strangers, "randoms" you can't trust, why on earth would you give them your house keys in the first place? This story makes no sense.

I voted YABU because once I was on holiday and my neighbour - a lovely woman, not a close friend but we've had coffee and chatted over the fence - texted while we were away, to say her cooker had broken so could she pop in and use ours? I said yes of course, she did, it was all fine. I would never have given her the keys if I didn't trust her.

weddinglovepure · 28/12/2022 09:19

@trulyunruly01 it worked, thank you so much:)

lightcurtains · 28/12/2022 09:19

I know this might sound drastic but I'd be tempted to call the police.
They cannot stay in your house. That is bang out of order. They've asked and you've said no - End Of.
It's so frustrating. I know I wouldn't be able to relax thinking there were people staying in my house!

TheLittlestLightOnTheXmasTree · 28/12/2022 09:20

Call the police?
Isn't that a waste of resources over something which may or may not have happened....what's the crime to report?

Inkpotlover · 28/12/2022 09:23

Squiblet · 28/12/2022 09:18

But if they're total strangers, "randoms" you can't trust, why on earth would you give them your house keys in the first place? This story makes no sense.

I voted YABU because once I was on holiday and my neighbour - a lovely woman, not a close friend but we've had coffee and chatted over the fence - texted while we were away, to say her cooker had broken so could she pop in and use ours? I said yes of course, she did, it was all fine. I would never have given her the keys if I didn't trust her.

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The neighbours aren't randoms, but OP said they're not close friends either. And it's not them who want to crash in her house – it's their relatives, who are total strangers to OP. No way would I say yes to that!

Hopeyoursproutsarealreadyon · 28/12/2022 09:24

Oh I dread to think what you will find op.

CrunchyCarrot · 28/12/2022 09:24

Next thing you know, they'll be saying 'oh we used some of your food because we didn't have enough and shops were closed' and 'we used your bath/shower because the hot water was out next door'. Where does it end?

Norfolkungood · 28/12/2022 09:26

Makes me wonder if this was their plan all along OP if you'd told them in advance when you were going away. To use your house as extra space to accommodate their guests. Who has relatives turn up unexpectedly at Christmas time if they have no guarantee they'll have somewhere to stay?

lightisnotwhite · 28/12/2022 09:26

I would get your brother to pick up the keys from the neighbours too. He can say your mum or someone is staying over.

That way they can check inside and the keys are safe ( he can leave them somewhere hidden in the garden if you want the second set accessible)

SoupDragon · 28/12/2022 09:27

Don't leave the keys hidden in the garden!

Womencanlift · 28/12/2022 09:27

lightisnotwhite · 28/12/2022 09:26

I would get your brother to pick up the keys from the neighbours too. He can say your mum or someone is staying over.

That way they can check inside and the keys are safe ( he can leave them somewhere hidden in the garden if you want the second set accessible)

That’s a good plan OP especially if you can’t get back. Even if your family just go in and switch the lights on but don’t actually stay, the keys will now be with people you trust

Womencanlift · 28/12/2022 09:28

But I would get them to keep the keys and not hide them. Safer that way and you can collect them from them when you are back

LakieLady · 28/12/2022 09:28

I'd let them do it, but tell them the charge is £250pp, pn.

They really are CFs of the highest order though.

Ursuladevine · 28/12/2022 09:30

Castleontheisland · 28/12/2022 08:42

Good god I never knew this! I thought I was being a good neighbour. Definitely getting the keys back and changing all the locks.

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“Changing all the locks”

that isn’t a small inexpensive job

lightcurtains · 28/12/2022 09:31

@TheLittlestLightOnTheXmasTree
Trespassing. People in your home without your permission. It's technically a break in as the key is being used for something else other than it's purpose.

Ursuladevine · 28/12/2022 09:31

LakieLady · 28/12/2022 09:28

I'd let them do it, but tell them the charge is £250pp, pn.

They really are CFs of the highest order though.

Well then you’d be breaking the law.

You’d be running a business. So your insurance would be invalid for a start

lightisnotwhite · 28/12/2022 09:33

SoupDragon · 28/12/2022 09:27

Don't leave the keys hidden in the garden!

I just knew someone would say that.

Ursuladevine · 28/12/2022 09:33

lightisnotwhite · 28/12/2022 09:33

I just knew someone would say that.

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Wow, that was clever of you!

SoupDragon · 28/12/2022 09:35

lightisnotwhite · 28/12/2022 09:33

I just knew someone would say that.

Show quote history

Then why suggest something so bloody stupid?

TheLittlestLightOnTheXmasTree · 28/12/2022 09:38

lightcurtains · 28/12/2022 09:31

@TheLittlestLightOnTheXmasTree
Trespassing. People in your home without your permission. It's technically a break in as the key is being used for something else other than it's purpose.

No. You are just imagining that has happened....no crime has been committed at this point so police would not even entertain it!

It's just a thought op has had.

daisychain01 · 28/12/2022 09:38

CrunchyCarrot · 28/12/2022 09:24

Next thing you know, they'll be saying 'oh we used some of your food because we didn't have enough and shops were closed' and 'we used your bath/shower because the hot water was out next door'. Where does it end?

..... and we wacked up your heating because we were cold.

oh and sorry but we accidentally left your door open because we don't know you, wouldn't know you if we passed you on the street, and aren't in the slightest bit bothered about the security of your property.

the OP gave their key to the NDN for emergencies for example if they ever lost their house key and were locked out, not so it could become open-house for their rent-a-crowd rellies.

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