Or is this the most obnoxious thing people do on MN?

[Furdinand]

"What did he say when you told him to fuck off"

"What did she say when you sent her home?"

When the OP clearly has said nothing of the sort and had come to MN to ask opinions on what she should say or do or if she was even being unreasonable to be upset in the first place.

It's such a weird thing to say, you'd never say it in real life because you'd sound like you hadn't followed the basics of the story before creating a second half!

Passive aggressive internet diagnosing people with anxiety is a close second.

The anxiety thing I agree with but isn't the first eg just a way of signalling support? Just like someone saying - well I hope you told them where to go! Doesn't mean they thought you did say that, only that you had a right to.

I agree. It's so sarky and smug.

I admire those posters who come back with factual scientific answers to the medical questions that are totally batshit.
I avoid them because I am a sarcastic bitch, but genuinely admire their adult, kind and logical responses. I wish I could be more like that rather than knee jerk sarcasm.

It's not the most obnoxious thing...but yes, it's pretty haughty.

It never reads as supportive to me. I think they're basically calling the OP wet for not having done it. In which case, I would have more respect for them if they just said that! I might be misinterpreting it though.

Because they think it makes them sound assertive, confident and that they have all their shit together.

most of us are rendered speechless when encountering real-life twattery and will be woken up at 4am next Tuesday with the “perfect comeback”.

Plus, the responses you mentioned are actually so weak that they invite dialogue and so are as ineffective as “did you mean to be so rude?” (Answer is obviously yes) - and “no is a complete sentence” (it’s not).

Then they should say that. There is nothing wrong with ‘you should have told him to fuck off.’ But ‘what did he say when …’ hints at feebleness from the OP and always always puts me in mind of bossy,
loud, officious women. Do what I say, for I am right.

I think posters think they're being clever and witty when they say it, but I just think they sound stupid.

Yes! I fucking hate it.

I see it the same way as you @Furdinand , I always have a "oh bugger off" response in my head.

Or the current 'you called your partner 'they' do you mean man or woman or your parents I'm so (faux) confused'
The content of the post is the same regardless and 'they' is a valid word not necessarily used as a pronoun.

If you can't understand it's not the thread for you.

"What did he say when you told him to fuck off"
^^
"What did she say when you sent her home?"

Would you prefer it if the questions were

“What did you say at the time?”

”How did you react?”

That’s always the part missing from the OP - what they did or said when the terrible/outrageous/rude thing first happened.

I agree but nearly as bad is a statement followed by "no?"

So wankerish.

I think a lot of posters just get frustrated with others' door-mat behaviour and total lack of boundaries. The presumption is that they must already have confronted their adversary, because why wouldn't you?

Cool story is another annoying response.

If they think the OP is lying, why not just say I'm calling you a liar, rather than the shitty phrase 'cool story'!

I think it is fairly obvious that would be better wouldn’t it @NoSquirrels ?

I really don’t mean that snippily but to me that’s so obviously, blindingly, more in tune with what most people would say or ask rather than ‘what did they say when …’

I’ve also noticed more posts recently telling posters to use critical thinking as well as calling people ignorant then there’s the old chestnut of “educate yourself”.

It would be less obnoxious because they don't pick one random assumption out of the air when clearly no such thing happened.. but usually the op has told us what happened and that is usually nothing.

That's why they've come to unload on MN. Because they don't feel like they can tell their mil to fuck off for buying them diet pills and a tin of cabbage soup for Christmas.

But then just say, "Don't be such a door mat"

The ironic thing is that the poster is being pa themselves rather than just saying what they think.

Tone on the internet is a funny thing.

See, your tone in that first bit of your post does indeed come across as extremely snippy and a bit sarcastic.

It’s quite possible people aren’t writing things in the tone that other people are reading them. And posters who use the phrasing the OP is annoyed by aren’t necessarily being superior or thinking things are blindingly obvious.

The ones where some poor woman is pouring her heart out about abuse and domestic violence, and some utter cunt thinks its clever to correct a point of grammar or syntax in her post, or says they can't possibly understand her because she hasn't broken her post into paragraphs.

Or when OP has no childcare
' Why can't the father do it'
Like that would never have occurred in

but usually the op has told us what happened and that is usually nothing.

I don’t agree with this but. Usually the OP doesn’t say what happened (‘I was too shocked to say anything!’) they just leave any response/non-response out of the OP. That’s why they get the questions.

The alternative to the posters being sarcastic is that they literally go around assuming that OPs withhold the ends of stories and that they actually intuitively know the exact end of those stories.