Aibu to think Mumsnet is full of people just wanting an argument?

[gloss234]

As the title says really.

Some commenters can offer advice, support or submit their differing opinions and move on.

But more over there seems to be a lot of people hell bent on destroying the original posters. It doesn't seem to be a constructive environment for discussions to take place.

I have seen alot of posts today where OP has posted something, some people have given opinions and others have focused on one minor detailed and been passive aggressive about everything and just not picked there way to an argument with OP and when OP has relented Mumsnet have closed the thread.

Yet do not seem to stop these relentless mums betters who are clearly just commenting for an argument rather than giving their opinion.

I hate to say this but I never used to dislike women so much before I discovered Mumsnet. And I am one.

Ah, that's unfair! A handful of nasty pieces of work, far outnumbered by the intelligent, supportive, at times laugh out loud witty majority. And some of the worst offenders? If they're women, then I'm Elvis.

So you say I said something, then backtrack and say maybe I didn't say it but then say it's still true but you don't want to link the thread or at least provide screenshots when asked? Okay then.

I don’t remember what the thread was and I’m not trawling through every thread you or I have posted on just to prove you could start an argument in an empty room.

The reason I recall your name is because on that thread and every one I have seen you on since you start an argument about nothing.

Yes.

And they always get basic facts wrong too.

Ok well I'm not trawling through posts either - it's your accusation, you should do it. I'll just conclude that as you already admitted "Perhaps you didn't actually use the word 'bitch'" after immediately accusing me of calling a poster "a bitch" that you're likely incorrect.

Once posted about a sad family estrangement, mostly over one incident. I described the incident and one poster immediately questioned me about one thing like they were Poirot dropping the reveal (but way more triumphant and goady); I explained that thing (which should have been obvious) and they disappeared and never on e actually contributed to the thread.

Threads tend to go like "I went to reach for a piece of cheese on the supermarket shelf, a woman swept in from the side and grabbed it, sweet off, knocking my toddler off they'd feet as she did so and did ot apologise" ....

"Oh op, you are so entitled! Why do you think you had more right to the cheese than her? You should be more careful about where you put your toddler, did he even apologise for nearly tripping her up? Have you ever thought of counselling for your clear issues?" Etc.

😂

Oh DFOD. I’m not pandering to your bullshit.

It's also full of people putting up threads designed to annoy people and prod them into responding 👀

Its not that you want to be nasty but when you read some of the stuff on here it makes you wonder if people are insane.
When someone is being unkind and asks if the being unkind they bloody well know they are or they would not ask.

So sometimes I let it out with both barrels because I find the subject matter to be unbearable.

No, it isn't! 😄

Some posters are just so judgemental and unreasonable others just want to play devils advocate and use a few facts and reasoned arguments

Depends on the board - if you post on AIBU I do think you need to expect to be told that YABU, and honestly most of the posters on there are trolls making stuff up for a reaction anyway. You see the OP completely contradicting themselves/drip feeding some outrageous domestic abuse or bereavement if the thread isn’t going their way over the course of a few pages, and you do become pretty cynical.

The Politics board (and Brexit and Covid boards) were also pretty fighty, but you don’t post on them unless you are prepared for that.

The relationship boards, the pet boards, the conception boards, the infertility boards etc - all lovely and supportive and welcoming.

There is a lot of unkindness on here

There is lovely support too

But the unkindness / harshness is really shocking and heartbreaking- we are all navigating life and connecting to mumsnet for support / advice / feedback that maybe we don't have in real life - a little more kindness politeness respect would make all mumsnet users alot more proud of our community

As a long time MN'er I have committed the cardinal sin of not reading the full thread but I couldn't agree with the OP more.

What I loved about MN was that it was a community of bright witty forceful women who brought insight, wisdom and humour to any number of threads. Aside from the endless trolls who seem to be targeting the site we now have a lot of posters who are just unnecessarily aggressive. It feels so much more divisive than it used to. I'm a huge fan of a healthy robust debate but there's just too much nastiness.

I've just called out someone who has said 'I despise people like you' in response to a relatively innocuous OP about Christmas presents. I mean it's the season of good-fucking-will isn't it?!

Of course it is. I registered on MN mainly out of curiosity as I’d heard some good stuff about it. However it soon became apparent that you’ll never get balanced and well-meaning advice from a bunch of competitive female strangers!

I think you need to look around the boards a bit more, and ignore AIBU. There's plenty of help and support on here as well as good advice.