Sage green dress drama - Bride

[lgcoopers]

Bride wants me to send a picture over of what I've chosen

I must wear a dress that's sage green. So must DD and DS (wear sage green). DD has to wear a dress but is exempt (bride's words) from wearing ballet slippers because she isn't walking yet

The men must wear any suit colour but black, with a sage green tie.

AIBU to tell her I can't find anything in my size really that's sage green?

She wants me to send pictures of what I've chosen for the kids before they turn up on the day

I've never been asked to wear a particular colour for a wedding and like PP I would not be impressed. The nearest I've come across is one wedding where guests were asked to avoid a particular colour due potential clashes with the bridesmaids. Seemed odd but an easy one to observe, unlike sticking to a single colour with photo approval required from the bride.

Must make for some fairly tedious photos as well - I'm just imagining that black and white line up looking like a bunch of dominoes.

@EddyF the two weird things about it in this case are the very specific, unusual colour, and the bride's request to see photos of the outfits in advance. Graciously excusing a baby from the ballet slipper rule on the grounds that she can't walk is also batshit.

Bit annoying now you've ordered!

I went to 5 weddings in one year. Wore the same outfit at all of them. Couldn’t afford to have a different outfit if we had to follow a theme

And you had just bought the dress!!
Has she said what the new plan is?

@berrycakeandcustard my understanding is whatever you want to wear is alright now? Just says ladies in dresses please

But that's it

I have created this for you to send to her with no explanation! 😁
#excellentuseofphotoshop

What's wrong with it is that it's insisting everyone buy a new outfit if they don't happen to have one in the prescribed colour.

I went to 14 weddings in two years. I wore three dresses on rotation to them all. No way I'd have been shelling out for a new one to match a theme.

Plus it will look really tacky.

I don’t like it, but I am surprised at the number of people that have never heard of it, I thought it was one of those growing trends like baby showers and gender reveal parties.

I have attended many weddings in my time, and sung at many more, but the only occasions on which I have seen themed weddings like this were African ones, where the bride, or her family, had supplied guests with fabric of the happy couple's choice. The results can be visually quite stunning, with the ladies sporting beautiful swathed dresses and headdresses, and some of the gentlemen sporting colourful suits made from the fabric!
If the bride has her heart set on such a colour theme, perhaps you could ask her if she is planning to pay for you to be clothed to her taste?
(I seem to recall from my Sunday School studies that it was the custom in Biblical times for the wedding party's host to make some such provision for those invited, hence his annoyance with the ingratitude of the wedding guest)
I would have thought that paying for the bridesmaids was quite enough.........

By the power of Mumsnet!

@Aprilx and as tacky and all about the insta

There are cultures where it’s traditional to have family wearing matching colours/fabrics at celebrations. That’s very different from telling your guests what to wear so your pictures will look good on the Insta.

This is very odd. OP chose a lovely dress from the mumsnet recommendations, now the sage is off.
What would happen if guests didnt send bride a photo of their outfits , would they then not be allowed to attend the wedding

Oh, that's good. At least it makes it easier for guests to find something that suits them and they aren't under so much pressure to find something in a particular colour. I was slightly worried you were going to say she had changed the colour scheme for guests and that you now had to go looking for a dress in another colour!

Hope you enjoy the wedding🙂

Love it😂BNL rock!

it is batshit to do this.

1. people suit different colours, they shoudl be allowed to wear something that suits them and that they feel comfortable in.
2. not everyone buys new for a wedding. If I have a perfectly good dress that I can wear I am not buying new for your wedding
3. UNless you are veyr lucky the reuslt will not be as you expect, a see of not quite matching greens or shades of grey/charcoal and black with whites where some are ivory and some looke grey next to the others is going to look crap.
4. It is pretty rude to be so dictatorial to people who are paying a lot to ocme and celebrate YOUR wedding. Be grateful for their presence (and their presents)

I'd now wear a trousers suit

"There’s absolutely nothing wrong with this request unless she’s left it late to inform guests."

Of course there is. It's control freakery.

I would not attend any wedding where I was asked to conform, as a guest, to a colour theme. A young relative of mine did this - not only changed her wedding venue from the initial UK venue (which would have involved minimal travelling for most of her close relatives including her elderly grandmother) to a "destination" venue which meant that quests would need to fly out there and pay for hotels etc, but then asked guests to wear black and white.

Ludicrous.

You're demanding guests buy a new outfit for your wedding (on top of present, transport, babysitter...) and possibly one in a colour that doesn't suit them, which they'll feel uncomfortable in and which they'll never wear again. And for what? Because you permanently think of yourself as curating an Instagram account, rather than just living, and you think the photos will look nice. Which they won't! They'll look shit.

Agree. I am just saying I have heard of it.

This^^
(Sage green, obvs).

Yay you chose my suggestion! It's stunning.
Im a 16 and I would wear it.
I was a bridesmaid once and it was strapless dresses. I have never felt to crappy wearing something in my life.

When is the wedding

Is she going to refund all the returns, if, she's on here.

Are half the guests now going to match and half not!

The strangest thing is how compliant you seemed. Unless she was paying for everything, accommodation, food, drinks, travel, I would not even have thought about it.

Tried to find a photo of this phenomenon to see if it looks as shit as it does in my head. Maybe it's the fact it's white/cream, but this looks like a cult.