Why is it taboo to discuss finances on mumsnet if your considered rich ?

[Hawkins001]

don't want to make this a thread about a thread, but if your earning say around 90k etc, as an example why is it taboo to try to discuss spending priorities in the current climate ?

we live in a capitalist society, and their has always been different levels of wealth across all sectors of society,

So is it a case of everyone has to wait until a certain level has been achieved across society before the rich or perceived rich can discuss spending priorities on mumsnet ?

All the best and positivity, I was using that amount as an example.

@Phoenixrising2020 as for the club reverence, I Understand your perspectives.

She does have that right, absolutely. I haven't read the full thread but the point I wanted to make and should have been clearer about is that in a period of time when there is so much hardship it is difficult for others to identify with and is likely to provoke a negative reaction.

It's hardly 'taboo', get a grip. People from all different socio-economic circumstances can and do talk about their lives and their money on here. But there are certain sensitivities around money, particularly at the moment, so clearly there will be some who think that certain posters might benefit from other perspectives. Who knows, maybe it might help them appreciate their good fortune in life.

I think discussing money is quite crass isn't it?

There's lots of taboo topics on MN. For me it's not that im upset about someone earning 90k.... it's the fact that some don't know what privilege is.

The context matters.

Someone earning £90k saying they're looking for advice on how to spend on renovations to make their old energy inefficient house more energy efficient given the cost of energy going up is pro not going to be jumped on. Someone wealthy that posts in relationships that they're concerned their husband is risking the family's financial security will probably get support. Someone asking for advice on how to invest their finances in a finance board is unlikely to get a pile on, same if they're asking about private schools on a private school board.

Someone posting in AIBU claiming that they've no idea how they're getting through the winter with the cost of living because they're only on £90k with one DC and they've 'no idea' how anyone manages with more children/a lower income/without a nanny is probably going to get a reality check.

But at the same time, people who are earning £90k probably work full time. I find it bizarre when people complain they can't afford to do things but don't work full time.

A teacher isn’t going to earn 90k even if they work as many hours as they can. There’s this weird idea amongst some that salary is related to effort/how hard you work. Maybe in some places but the U.K. does not, on the whole, reward jobs that are valuable to society with high wages.

@girlmom21 your example is tone deaf. Some of us are part time for a reason it's not always possible.

I agree with you though that people earning 90k are working full time that's besides the point. Most people will be full time or have been and they are not earning 90k regardless.

Thanks for the good wishes Hawkins, thankfully I have found a way to offset some of the costs.

Obviously you have worked hard and are very successful, but not everyone has done so or importantly, been able to do so. Either way it makes for difficult reading when a person is really struggling.

I rarely open threads like this, I had a difficult day yesterday and it caught my eye. You have a right to discuss whatever you like, but although it isn't actually taboo, others may find it distasteful, depending on the context of course.

However, I do think you should be very proud of yourself for being able to command such a high income. You must have worked very hard, especially since English isn't your first language and I would love to hear how you did it!

You're right, sorry. People who are part time through necessity aren't the people I was referring to. I should have clarified that.

Although lots of people claim it's necessity when in reality it's not.

Oh the deserving part time 🙄

I work in a mobile phone retail store - I have to do an affordability check with customers for the device loan where the first question is approximate monthly net income and the vast majority of people are taking home £1500-2000 per month.

If you take home 3x the average you are rich.

I am sorry that you (or anyone) is the position you are in.

However, MN isn’t designed as a low income only support site.

That’s like saying you shouldn’t post that you have kids. Because some people can’t have any.

I agree OP. I understand when PP are saying people who are struggling will see it, but don't we all see threads we don't particularly like? Or that make us feel a certain way?

Unfortunately society has become a place where one person can't have something because 80% of other people can't afford it. It's almost as though the better off are forced to pretend they aren't, as the resentment from everyone else is too much hassle.

There's too much envy around for my liking, just be happy for what other people have. They've made the right decisions in life to lead them to a comfortable lifestyle, it's not their fault that someone else didn't.

It’s because someone on 90k thinks they are in the same boat as and can relate to someone on 20k because “we’re all feeling the pinch”.

You live within your means, though, so someone on £90k is likely to have a bigger mortgage/bigger house/higher bills so are being impacted proportionally

Yeah I think the last paragraph here is the sort of thing people have problems with - funnily enough (& as I said earlier we are a high income household so I am not green with envy 🙄)

Yes. Someone who earns 90k is earning far more than the vast majority of people. They might be struggling with their outgoings and financial commitments but they were able to afford more outgoings and commitments than the vast majority in the first place.

I think if you equate it to asking people advice in real life you'd choose your audience carefully. You wouldn't go up to a food bank queue and say 'excuse me, I've got too much spare cash in my current account count, can you recommend an investment company?'. For that kind of question you can go to a more relevant Investment thread on here (after all, that's the sort of reason there ARE different Mumsnet topics where you can filter out anything irrelevant).

There is an awful lot of hatred for net contributors on here. The ones who do the heavy lifting tax wise. The answer is to demand they pay more and work for an “equal wage.” Considering we are very close to tipping point - nearly 50% of adults don’t pay any income tax and of those that do, many are still net takers. We have got a bit of a problem coming. Shouting high earners down and constantly demanding they pay more for everyone so their income is on a parity is half the issue in here. No incentive to retrain or do better. That mentality is why the country is in a mess - partly. You can’t just expect such a small proportion of the population to fund everyone else. Work needs to pay and wages need to rise. People need to think of the bigger picture, they don’t. On here they just abuse higher earners and expect them to be paid the same as everyone else by contributing more tax.

People on PAYE are well off and comfortable but they aren’t rich. They are workers who have done well for themselves and contribute most of the tax burden. The rich are those with familial wealth and inheritance, millionaires and billionaires who pay nothing in tax. People target the wrong people because of government gaslighting.

On some posts you'd think everyone on Mumsnet wax rich. 2 million pension pots by 35, earning 200k a year etc.

I think it's perceived, with credible justification, that we don't really live in a Capitalist society, of the kind which used to be envisaged and celebrated.

Many people think that big super conglomerates hold the power and that there are not really the same opportunities to work hard and do well and build up a business from nothing as we are used to believing existed: 1900 - twenty off years ago. There is also a sense of graduates not being able to get jobs and ridiculously difficult selection and interview processes and lengthy internships on zero earnings. So the situation is seen as getting even more restrictive - instead of open, and opportunity-giving, as it used to be seen.

You read historic success stories of little bakeries setting up a delivery round, 100 years ago and then expanding to produce and market tins of biscuits and then becoming a household name for manufacturing these and confectionery. It feels as if anything then was possible, if you borrowed a little money from a relative and worked very hard. I read the Tunnocks Biscuits story (Scottish firm) which is exactly, on the face of it, that inspiring example of what Capitalism can be. The sense of freedom to be creative and make a product and grow from small to big gives hope and a sense of excitement. A lot of people feels things have changed and that there is too much influence - over supermarkets, etc - in the hands of a few powerful forces.

A lot of middle income people are more Left- leaning - certainly in the big cities, where they see disparity. They feel that opportunities need to be shared out a lot more through government policies. They feel that they can only be happy and comfortable with their adequate incomes, if they see others having some good opportunities too. This equates to a quite common professional person attitude in the big cities.

The threads about staffing crises in schools show how today's children are not being served well and this seems fundamentally unfair. Then there is the difficulty of according childcare which stymies attempts to go for it, earn and support your children. Its a lovely thing to have money, if everything is seen as fine and equal, it's like being a player in the successful Lionesses football team, it's all a tribute to effort and perseverance.

Without blaming the individuals who have got themselves a high-paying job, because they have only done what it's best to do, which is to work hard, and to help Society with their nurtured and excellent skills, many think it's a bit tone deaf, I suppose to post about what you say.