Why is it taboo to discuss finances on mumsnet if your considered rich ?

[Hawkins001]

don't want to make this a thread about a thread, but if your earning say around 90k etc, as an example why is it taboo to try to discuss spending priorities in the current climate ?

we live in a capitalist society, and their has always been different levels of wealth across all sectors of society,

So is it a case of everyone has to wait until a certain level has been achieved across society before the rich or perceived rich can discuss spending priorities on mumsnet ?

@Addicted2Kale sometimes friends on the same income level are more of an echo chamber. it's good to have a different perspective on a problem and examine different approaches.
i guess that's when people pay for financial advice. just like the divorce section and people not wanting to pay for advice they want a free conversation on the matter.

An important reason for high earning women to share their knowledge and experiences on forums like this is to dispel myths. One example I see a lot - so many people seem to think that earning a six figure salary means working ridiculous hours in a high pressure job in London. It's important to know that there are high paying, low pressure, flexible jobs that can be done from home in any part of the country to fit around family life.

And again, which is assets not income

What you own not what you earn

i agree @Annabel073

This and other similar posts are propped up on straw men.

The point being made is that someone on £90k can still find themselves in a difficult position, and can genuinely be affected by things like CofL increases, despite their income. Against this background it is suggested that their attempts to discuss matters or seek support in this forum should not be shut down.
Has anyone said someone on £90k can't find themselves affected by the cost of living increases? I certainly haven't.

@LolaSmiles and others respond by saying that someone on £90k shouldn’t “pretend” they’re in the same boat as someone on a lower salary, or complain when their problems are caused by having spent their money on a Porsche.
Unfortunately another poster did suggest we should be mindful of people in Porches using food banks because they've fallen on rough times.
I still think that if someone prioritises a flash car over having a buffer for a rainy day, that is in no way similar to people who couldn't have saved for a rainy day, and certainly wouldn't have had a period of time where a Porsche was affordable to them.

Literally no one has suggested that. It’s a problem which simply doesn’t exist.
The Porche was an example given by a different poster, which I was replying to.
Rather than answer the question actually in front of them, @LolaSmiles is pretending that the issue is totally different, and creating bogeymen, in order to score points.

No point scoring at all. On this thread people are arguing that being in a fortunate position to own your own house with the potential to downsize isn't actually an option for people because they might need to have some money for estate agent fees, or we need to be mindful of the man who was loaded and driving around in a Porsche who now goes to a food bank because he lost his job.

People with high incomes can be affected by the cost of living increases. They also have a huge amount more choices than those who don't.

Every now and then there's the threads from posters who claim they 'can't afford' to have children and they don't understand how people afford children, and then go on to explain their large mortgage, high household incomes, etc and it becomes clear what they actually mean is they can 100% afford to have children, but it might mean a change in lifestyle if they want to move to a bigger house, send two children to private school and maintain the holidays.

I agree with you Annabel073.

Context matters when it comes to money talk. It makes sense for women to empower other women on these matters, especially when the pay gap between men and women is so large in places.

I tend to find people don't mind money talk when it's supportive or someone genuinely seeking advice on a situation (regardless of their income), but people tend to get a bit snarky when people with assets and high salaries appear to be unaware/pretend to be unaware that they're more fortunate than others.

I think of it as very similar to Brexit whereby those of us talking about it causing issues in many small businesses or employers relocating to EU were poo pooed by others , because you know hey it suited many of those well off mumsnetters with family off shore accounts to preserve that or at the other end of the income spectrum their HGV driver partner was suddenly getting £4 an hour more due to many EU workers leaving the UK. It's basically a lack of empathy or sympathy by many for anyones situation that doesn't correspond with your own at that time. We have been at both ends of the earning spectrum (although never over the £120k family level) but they both have issues because more money often brings higher expectations and pressure to keep it that way by employers and other family members and mumsnet is meant to be a broad church.

What are the high paying, low pressure, flexible jobs - they sound like a dream - please share - I'm sure we'd all like to know and steer our kids that way if it's too late for us.

I don't get how people on low income want to come onto a thread that is clearly about someone on a higher income feeling the pinch - is it like picking a scab - you know it's going to hurt but you just can't stop yourself - I'd suggest you do yourself a favour and earn to stop reading things that upset you.

This is true and I have actually seen some posters on here saying they earn £100k plus and had people say "I don't believe you". Some people seem to struggle with the idea that women can earn high salaries and its empowering for this to be dispelled.

But again, there's a way of doing this. It's one thing to state as a point of fact in a discussion about money that you earn £100k plus, It's quite another to say "I earn £100k plus and I'm really hard up because x". It's completely tone deaf, if you earn three times the UK average wage to claim to be hard up. You may have high outgoings which make cashflow difficult but its not comparable to not knowing where your next meal is coming from.

What are the high paying, low pressure, flexible jobs - they sound like a dream - please share - I'm sure we'd all like to know and steer our kids that way if it's too late for us.

Steering your children towards STEM subjects is always worthwhile, not just for future earning potential in the UK but also because of the broader opportunities worldwide.

My thought process is, if I want a solution to a problem, I ask people who either;

A) Professionally qualified to advise (aka, accountant)

B) Someone who has been in my position...and SOLVED the issue.

Putting the subject to lower earners is not about seeking a solution. It's about promoting their self appointed superiority over them, hence invoking "communism" in their retorts. It is also why they are attacking their right to respond as they wish. Objection is not against Mumsnet guidelines.

Posting and replying without abuse are both the rights bestowed to ALL posters. The OPs complaint is without merit. IMO.

This question doesnt make any sense at all. Why on earth would someone necessarily have people earning the same money as them to ask questions or advice from about income struggles???

What are the high paying, low pressure, flexible jobs - they sound like a dream - please share - I'm sure we'd all like to know and steer our kids that way if it's too late for us.

There's plenty of freelance consultancy work around which could pay £100k plus if you are experienced and have a good network and reputation. In my line of work I know several people (men and women) who worked at the job for a company and then left and set up their own one-man band, (mainly) remotely but choosing their hours. You will have spurts of high intensity work for projects for sure but you aren't working every day and you get to turn work away.

I can think of several fields where this is possible.

You have to have worked as a FTE before getting to this point of course and would likely work very hard before you went freelance to establish yourself. But its not that uncommon.

Agree with PP that STEM subjects are a help for this but not having a STEM degree doesn't rule you out. I know people with humanities degrees who are paid at these sorts of levels.

@Thepeopleversuswork

That's true, I am a freelance consultant much as you describe. I work remotely and travel a lot. My hours are completely flexible. If someone had told me this was possible 15 years ago, I would honestly never have believed them. I'd never go back to a permanent job.

What type of consultancy, what companies would they work for?

I find the vagueness on a lot of threads really frustrating.

Well off the top of my head:

Tech consultancy (can pay £££). A family friend is a tech troubleshooter for City companies and works on projects, he can earn £40-£50k for three/four weeks work. He gets to work more or less 9-5 hours and doesn't work for weeks on end because his field is so specialist he's one of a handful of people who can do the job.
Marketing or PR
Corporate finance adviser
Security/risk adviser
Scientific advisers who work for pharma and biotech companies creating or running clinical trials

All of these jobs will rely on someone having worked in-house for some years -- you don't walk into them from nowhere. But you can earn a very good living and work reasonably family-friendly hours at least some of the time.

An example that comes to mind is a thread a few weeks ago about the proposal to add VAT to private school fees - lots of posters complaining about how difficult this would be for them, in some cases meaning private school would no longer be affordable.

Many on the thread seemed oblivious to the clear and easy solution to this 'financial crisis' - send your children to state school.

What people on a higher income don't always seem to grasp is that they usually have a significant buffer - composed of things such as private school fees, a larger than average house, expensive and/or frequent holidays - between their current lifestyle and a lifestyle where they would struggle to afford the basics of food and heating. And it does cause anger when such people moan and complain about their lot.

Imagine a misogynist came on here, suggesting maternity pay should be abolished, you're honestly going to ignore that nonsense if "it upsets you" and not post a response??

That is not a reasonable position to hold against lower earners. They have the same right to speak as higher earners.

Scientific advisers who work for pharma and biotech companies creating or running clinical trials

Also final signatories for pharma

What are the high paying, low pressure, flexible jobs - they sound like a dream - please share - I'm sure we'd all like to know and steer our kids that way if it's too late for us.

DH and I have a household income of £90k and are both public servants, very flexible. Wouldn't say entirely low pressure, but lower pressure than many jobs that pay less like nursing! I reckon we could get to about £120k (combined) with flexibility before going up to the tier of management that would require us to be less flexible.

@bellac11
International marketing in my case

There is no ‘room’ on mumsnet, there are rooms. Rooms you are free to avoid if they offend or annoy you.

On that note though, is it reading the room when you decide to post on a thread about a subject that doesn’t apply to you, to harangue those it does?

Your example is ridiculous. The high earner coming on here and saying I think low earners are lazy AIBU - of course you'd bite - it's a direct attack, just like your example.
This is about higher earners feeling the pinch, which of course they might do - no attack on lower earners at all. But carry on picking that scab., You have the same right to read these threads and share how angry they make you feel, you can try to shout people down if that's what makes you feel better - on you go.

Poor analogy, considering that having wealth is not the same as holding opinions based on a desire to harm a group of people.

People who make threads here that are struggling on a higher income are not creating threads bitching about the poor. They’re venting and/or looking for advice from those in a similar position. Those on a lower income are not being attacked, and thus aren’t required to attack as a response.

Why would you not ask someone, on a similar income level and circumstance, who ISN'T struggling, for advice?