Everyone is stressed and miserable.

[liloandtitch]

Rewind five years and I would say that my friends and family were a happy group. We had our problems of course, but a good chat putting the world to rights over a bottle of red usually seemed to help.

Right now though my best friend is pregnant, has huge health anxiety and rarely leaves the house.

Another good friend is stressed and burnt out at work, thinking of leaving her partner but has no energy to do anything.

A third I barely hear from, never reads her messages or picks up the phone, she lives the other end of the country so we can’t just pop in to see how she is. I know money was tight for her before cost of living crisis, so I’m guessing she is stressed out.

My sister is off work with stress, she is also gutted house purchase fell through as can no longer afford a mortgage and feels really bleak right now.

My 80year old aunt who used to be such a great giggle went downhill massively during covid and now I think she is probably depressed.

My boss’s son has developed OCD and all sorts of emotional problems so we hear all about that at work.

Nobody is in the mood for celebrating and the Christmas parties, coffees and catch ups that used to happen just aren’t on the cards this year because nobody seems to have the energy, the money or frankly the cheer. I confess, I can’t be bothered either a lot of the time.

Just looking at my own circle, seems like almost everyone is just feeling really down right now. Are others seeing the same?

I agree. I want to be grateful and happy as I know I am fortunate in many ways, but since lockdown I have put on loads of weight, I am always cold and exhausted. I have looked into my health but can’t find a concrete reason for it. My DD has changed from a happy tween to an anxious and very unhappy teen. I used to love going out and organising events, but just have a real feeling of not being bothered anymore. We are in the middle of yet another restructure at work which doesn’t help. I have almost got to the point where I want to finish all my friendships as maintaining them feels like an effort. It’s awful when I stop and think about it. I am going to make a lot of New Year’s resolutions and stick to them!

I’m so sorry, that is a LOT to deal with 💐

I think I have a few friends with problems, and if I think about it, I know of many people with problems - but plenty who don't, plenty who are untouched from covid / cost of living and who are healthy and enjoying life. I don't think it's really any different than pre covid if I'm honest.

The mental & physical health repercussions caused by the extended isolation of repeated Lockdowns will, in my view, be far more damaging long term than the virus. The difference is, you can't take a test to confirm to find the cause if the issue or have a jab to be well again. Many have been deeply damaged - and now there is a cost of living crisis.....

Absolutely, every one of my closest friends is now having some sort of mental health problem and/or is now medicated, having never been previously. It's really difficult to round people up into a get together, they mostly just don't happen. Very worrying and sad, I do keep trying.

This thread sums up everything i feel about my life now, my husband died of a massive stroke on !st jan this year, he had the first one on xmas eve when we were supposed to go visit my daughter and he would see his 2nd grandaughter for the first time.
We were married for nearly 35 years and he was my soulmate.
His death was contributed massively by very bad neighbours above us, constant noise and anti social behaviour from a feral family of 6 who threatened us when we complained about the noise and police would do nothing, same with housing trust, i'm still living with this noise and threats from the husband every time i leave my flat and the stress led me to go deaf in my right ear, and my immune illness got much worse, i'm struggling to pay the bills, unable to work or put the heating on, i now walk with a stick as the pain in my joints hurts so much, i try for the sake of my 2 grown up kids but see no way out of this, can't afford to move or get away from this hell, i just want to join my husband

The cost of living crisis will certainly be getting people down.
Other than that I think you tend to look for trends - and it's just as likely that there as many people having an ok / good time. The ebb and flow of illness, trauma, bereavement is always there but sometimes it's not your 'turn.'
Sympathy to everyone having a tough time.

I agree. There is such a bad low mood in the office - no banter or chat anymore, everyone with their own anxieties and worries. I think Covid has done a number on many people.

I'm incredibly worried about next year and the cold is getting me down but overall not too miserable here. Like many PPs, I've cut back a lot and the lack of treats isn't helping my mood at times. I appreciate others are cutting back on food/energy and my moaning about treats feels indulgent.

On the plus side, if we're all cutting back now, inflation rates must surely come down next year making things more affordable. Employment remains really high so maybe it will be a not-too-terrible recession as these things go and next November will look more positive economically.

And yet if you even remotely suggest that immigration isn't going to help this issue you are branded an evil bigot.

I just think we look back to before Covid and didn’t realise how good we had it tbh. And the future just seems to be a long dark tunnel with no light in sight yet. I worry a lot for future generations - I think life is going to be tough for many years and it’s a depressing thought.

Well, if we end up in a nuclear conflict people will no doubt be saying how good we had it at the moment....

We've been through a rotten time since Covid and it doesn't feel like there's light at the end of the tunnel. Some of the posts here are truly heartbreaking. What can we do but try to get on? The cost of living crisis here is a bloody nightmare and the cherry on the cake is this freezing weather. It's shit and it's going to be shit for a while longer. It's getting to everybody.

Thank you. Oh and my Gran slowly became more responsive and is back to how she was. That’s one good thing at least.

How about meeting up with them individually? If they are struggling with mental health a get together may be too much even if they are all friends. It seems like a much bigger deal than a cuppa with a friend.

I don’t know anyone that’s looking forward to Christmas this year, even the ones that are usually Christmas crazy seem to have lost their sparkle.

For me it’s a mixture of covid and financial issues, I am struggling to not spend more than I have coming in especially with energy prices being so high and the temperatures outside dropping. I can’t really afford Christmas this year. I have big plans for the new year so I can’t wait for Christmas to be out of the way so I can hopefully improve my financial situation.

I think it’s hard for people to find things to look forward too right now, all we can do is try and support each other and hope that things get easier.

People are going through so much. I’m so sorry for all those who have lost loved ones in particular .

I’m really trying hard to be positive, grateful and to count my blessings, but it has been an uphill struggle this year. I’m just mentally and physically exhausted, is the crux of it. I worked all through covid and the lockdowns, and the Adrenalin that required has left the building big time this year. I feel so flat and like I have nothing left to give.

Perimenopause, bereavement (my best friend had a terminal cancer diagnosis just before covid hit and died last year) , an extremely stressful job, worrying about my teens (especially the one with SEND), money worries, ageing parents. It’s all just life stuff, isn’t it? But it seems to be weighing very heavy on my heart lately. M

I’m really going to try to rest over Christmas and be thankful for what I have - a home, a lovely DH, a family, a job, safety. I’ll try!

I’m mostly sick and tired of everyone being sick and tired, myself included. We’ve all been sick on and off for two months solid, it’s rare that everyone has been ok at any given time. We were all recovering over the weekend from a bout of covid that was dragged out over 3 weeks then DS started with some other illness or another on Saturday so he’s still down. Absolutely fed up with it now. I had covid 2 weeks ago but still somehow have a cough and snotty nose, so annoying.

I really love this time of year and plan a lot of activities over the weekends but none have really gone to plan so far because someone has been sick so had to miss out. It’s really crap.

And this is why we don’t vote Tory.

Some of the stories on here are truly heart rending and I can only imagine what said posters must be going through. However, I think there's also an aspect of the current situation being the perfect excuse for the glass half full types to wallow if I'm honest.

Why not try and focus on something positive. The next couple of years may well be shit but why not try and come out of them having accomplished something. If you need to lose a few lbs then start hitting the gym. I pay £20 a month and do at least 16 sessions for that - so £1.25 a sesh and I have the most epic free shower after as well.

A year from now you could look better than you have for years and good workout improves mental health no end. Or maybe you always wanted to learn an instrument. Now's a good time to be sitting inside geeking on a new hobby and saving them pennies.

So sorry for your loss. I hope you and your son enjoy Christmas as best you can and you get joy and strength from him ❤️

My biggest gripe and concern for everyone is health.
COL crisis means people not heating their homes and not eating properly - there are both short and long term health implications of this for all ages.
We may have come out of the lockdowns of covid but next new virus seems to be predicted every few months and it's probably inevitable.
People are still battling with long term health issues - mental or physical caused by covid.
Infections are currently rife. There are local shortages of antibiotics as well as global shortages of antibiotics. Antibiotics are also becoming less effective. There are infections which are very hard to treat - returning to a life pre-antibiotics will dramatically alter life expectancy.
You can't get healthcare appointments easily - even private waiting lists have increased recently. Even when it's important - e.g. you need antibiotics - no GP appointments, 111 taking 24 hours to reply to urgent queries, people dying as ambulances can't attend the number of emergencies, ambulance queues, people dying in A&E waiting to be seen.
NHS staff striking - even Kier Starmer said a 19% payrise was unaffordable for nurses - I can't see that ending. More suffering.
Poor housing, homelessness, overcrowding all impact health.

Health seems to me to the key issue. Life is not good when poor health comes across you and there is no support due to the overwhelmed NHS.

@Garysmum has it I think. We went into Covid as a comparatively poorly nation (we are unhealthier than many developed countries on many metrics) with low levels of health care staff (Dr's, nurses) and beds compared to others (Germany for example). Our physical health is poor, our mental health is poor, our housing stock is crap and we have too many poorly paid insecure jobs. All of this takes a toll. No wonder people feel like shit. Tbh the decline started well before Covid, but we've been the proverbial boiling frogs... Now it's all really hitting us (years of austerity, cheap borrowing, lack of funding to train Drs/ fix transport/educate our kids)

100 agree with you, I feel like COVID had nothing on this year. I found my mum dead a day before her birthday in July, although I'm not sure what was worse finding her passed or all the stuff she wrote about me and realising how much she didn't want me. And hated me. (only daughter, and my parents split many many years ago so I had to deal with it all) but even without that happening life is just so god dam depressing. I've cut most ties with everyone apart from one friend. Don't want to go out. Don't want to socialize just don't want to do anything. I'm glad to hear I'm not alone. Just don't know how to get out the hole. Sending hugs to anyone that needs one. X

Yep. Sadly I think the best part of 2 years isolating plus the cost of living at the moment is making everyone feel depressed.
Christmas is more of a “Can I afford to buy for everyone and pay the bills?!’
Food prices are ridiculous! As are the price of electricity and petrol/diesel….
Our government is dealing with the crisis in the short term by dishing out COL payments to the most vulnerable but isn’t addressing the issue long term or helping families who earn just over the threshold so get no help at all and have to use food banks!
The darker evenings seem darker this year…. It’s the first year ever that I’ve really felt the clocks going back and the effects of it getting cold and dark so early…. I guess I’m just more aware of putting heating and lights on.