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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to send my nearly 10 yo to a foreign speaking school if I move to a different country

128 replies

pingpongpo · 07/12/2022 21:44

They will be 10 in may 23 and I would prefer they went to a state school to immerse in the language and culture but feel bad and am now wondering if a private English speaking school would be better.

Some people I know are saying iabu to even think about doing this and others have been through it and are bilingual. Can't decide at all. I can get by in the language but I'm not fluent. Will probably become fluent and plan to.

OP posts:
botharna · 09/12/2022 15:51

You sound very open on destination - just to add another spanner in the France plan, if you are planning on working remotely for your current company, rather than joining an office there, you, or your employer will find it very expensive. You can't for example, continue to work for a UK company without them registering for paying social charges in France, which adds a lot to the cost of employing you (+25% I think).

It also sounds like to want to be an expat rather than an immigrant, in terms of attitude. These are two very different approaches to living abroad and IME the the expat mentality is challenging when it comes to supporting your children in local school in France, and probably the same in other countries. I think you need to be committed to living there and integrating.

Also in most of France, "private" schools are not private in the way English people understand them. In the main, they are private only because they are Catholic and fees tend to be very low, often means tested and can have a very broad range of social classes depending on the catchment area. International schools are more like English style private schools in that they are only for the wealthy, or for people moving around with jobs and fees paid by employers. The whole ethos is completely different.

I also think that the educational experience and choice of schools in Paris is probably extremely different to outside Ile de France. Will you be in a capital city or looking to be more rural?

pingpongpo · 09/12/2022 21:27

Thanks @botharna yes work are covering the cost of visas plus hoping to relocate to the Paris office but wfh so can choose where to live.

Re private schools I have found some British schools? I know a lot of private schools are religious. Not overly interested in those, dc is Christian but we're not really into it in a big way. Shame as I do really love France. Thanks for the suggestions from pp too I am working my way through them!

OP posts:
Chocchops72 · 09/12/2022 22:27

British schools tend to fall in the ‘international private’ group along with the ‘international school of …’, though they tend to be smaller. They are fully private, very expensive, teach in English, follow the U.K. curriculum or maybe the IB in secondary. They are ideal for international, expat, mobile families who want their children to slot easily back into an English speaking country after a few years. Or high earners who want to move in these circles, but don’t necessarily want to integrate in the host country.

Catholic privées are French, and usually sous contrat to the state. This means that their teachers are funded by the govt and they have to follow the national French curriculum, but are able to have religious practices within the school too. In practice many non religious families use them - they often have smaller classes, more discipline, selective entry so are seen as superior by some. They aren’t that expensive, as they are state subsidised, and they expect quite a lot of family involvement. In my city, certain Catholic privées are very ‘establishment’: they are where the old elite families send their children , plus anyone who wants to buy into that status. They are seen as strict, rigorous (there’s no higher praise for a school in France 🙄) and very academic. if you want to establish yourself and your family in France, and follow the French way, this is where to aim for.

If you are heading to Paris, there is Saint Germain, with the British section. They are set up to take native English speakers who want to integrate with the French system and provide FLE support. Children work towards the Bac, plus extra work in their Section langue.

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