to feel hurt? Last day of my job

[jaydeymoo22]

...before moving onto a new job, and I didn't even get a card from my work/team. Nothing. I'm not expecting a gift (I never would, especially in the current climate), but there was literally no acknowledgement that it was my last day. It was so weird. It just got to to the end of the working day and that was it. I'd worked there for 5 years.
AIBU to feel a bit upset?
Would you expect a card or something, or at least your manager to have some nice things to say/well wishes?
I feel hurt and like I've left with a sour taste in my mouth to be honest

🤨 jeez @Katkinsgreyy, time and place!

That’s crap OP. And very, very weird. Another one wondering what happened when you left?!

I worked somewhere one day a week for 16 years. Everyone knew it was my last day. All I got was a "See y'later" from the receptionist.

I hope your new place is better OP.

That's crap op - really unpleasant. Grasping at straws here but have you checked nothing has come through on email? We've moved on to e-cards now since covid as otherwise it's difficult to get people to sign them.

Plus the vouchers I bought a team member in her retirement were sent through on 28 November - she left in June! I'm
Mortified and will be having strong words with John Lewis. She did get an e card and a party though so it was acknowledged!

It’s a shitty feeling isn’t? I left a job after 11 years and got absolutely nothing. Sadly it’s left a sour taste in my mouth, especially having spent years contributing to other people’s life events including things like wine, chocs and flowers for temps who had only been with us for as little as 2-3 months.

I think partly it depends on whether you have friends at work who organise collections etc, vs colleagues/manager who just can’t be bothered. It’s sad that people just don’t think sometimes how they would feel if the boot was on the other foot.

Crappy yes. Proves we all just numbers. Not nice though. My brother law got nothing over 20yr there lousy

I work in a huge Organisation. Very often I find out weeks or months later that someone has left. Very often that person is a massive loss to the organisation and did an amazing job, very often they are lovely people who have been extremely helpful and taught me a lot.
I would have loved to sign a card, donate to a gift, or even better meet for drinks and say thank you very much, all the best, keep in touch, etc.
Sometimes people don’t know that it’s your last day x

Were you not handing stuff over, closing stuff off. Did you literally just sat bye and leave and no one reacted?

A colleague had a big birthday 50th and I was the only one in the office of 10 not to be invited. Now that was intentional. I only found out there had been a party next day when another colleague asked me how the party had been? I cried and felt so alone. There was an uneasy silence in the office for a couple of days.
She’s on Mums Net and I hope she reads this.
It was about 12 years ago and still makes me feel sick. She did come to my ‘leaving do’ a couple of years later. I still feel sad after all these years.
I think your workmates perhaps thought you’d be leaving at the end of the month.
Hopefully the next workplace will value you. I’m sending you good wishes and a bright happy healthy New Year!

I would actually like this as I don't like goodbyes or attention but I know I'm not the norm

Do leavers normally get an acknowledgment?

Depends on the sort of place you worked. I've not had a leaving card or present from two places (nursing jobs), but didn't take it personally because both workplaces were in complete chaos, short-staffed and no one knew what day of the week it was, let alone that someone was leaving. Collections for other people also never happened, so wasn't fussed when it happened to me, just relieved to leave!

What did other people get? Is there one person who usually takes responsibility for organising cards and collections etc? Maybe they were off or unaware that you were leaving?

Sorry to hear this, awful behaviour by your (ex) team. Wishing you the very best in your new job, hopefully they will be a nicer bunch of people.

My OH retired after around 27 years and didn't even get a card. When I think the amount of times he put £20 into collections I was not happy.

Wow. How insensitive

That is very shitty op. Did your colleagues acknowledge you leaving verbally? As in at least saying good luck etc

The way I read this message was that kitkinsgrey is saying that if she got a send off for 3 months work, then OP definitely should have!

I once had a lovely job in a hospital for a year. I was part time but got on with the team really well and enjoyed my time there. On my last day I got a card a truly awful vase. I asked if anyone wanted to go out for lunch and everyone mumbled no thanks. I was so embarrassed and confused! So I do empathise but just move on and put it down to weird office culture.

If they're that horrible, you're better off gone.
How awful. X

The only excuse I can find for your ex-colleagues would be if you’d moved internally, at the same site or within the same business. In which case they maybe wouldn’t consider that you had left ‘properly’. But I am clutching at straws.

Otherwise I think it’s this, from a PP:

I think partly it depends on whether you have friends at work who organise collections etc, vs colleagues/manager who just can’t be bothered

It’s always women who take the trouble to arrange cards and collections, in my experience. Usually the men can’t be bothered. So if there wasn’t a suitable type of woman amongst your colleagues, nothing would happen. Or they’d all assume that your line manager would do something. It’s laziness rather than a sign of dislike, but it’s difficult to deal with. Better luck at your next job.

I don't think @Katkinsgreyy is trying to rub in the fact that she got a card and some chocolates after leaving a job she'd only been at for 3 months. I think what she means is that even after only being there a short time they still managed to to buy her a card and leaving gift.

I actually got a token leaving gift; it wasnt the being cheap she lies!! but the lack of thought. Colleague had nipped out to buy me some flowers from the whole office. Yet the person who got them knew that I was leaving for a 3 week holiday abroad the next day (starting new job on my return). At least my next door neighbour got to enjoy them!

Gosh that's terrible! Be glad you're moving jobs and won't see those people again

When I left the last place, after 15 years, I got a small gift from a few immediate colleagues.

Usually, there is a departmental collection and the senior boses contribute to it too when someone leaves. Nothing like that for me, although I'd arranged countless other people's collections over the years, many who'd have much less service than me, which would usually raise over £100.

Probably people can't be bothered arranging a gift, and if no one can be bothered, it's not a reflection on us, but them. Best out of there. People can be so thoughtless.

Yes so did I. People really jumping on this, it’s silly.