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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel hurt? Last day of my job

136 replies

jaydeymoo22 · 07/12/2022 19:50

...before moving onto a new job, and I didn't even get a card from my work/team. Nothing. I'm not expecting a gift (I never would, especially in the current climate), but there was literally no acknowledgement that it was my last day. It was so weird. It just got to to the end of the working day and that was it. I'd worked there for 5 years.
AIBU to feel a bit upset?
Would you expect a card or something, or at least your manager to have some nice things to say/well wishes?
I feel hurt and like I've left with a sour taste in my mouth to be honest

OP posts:
olivertwist2 · 07/12/2022 20:19

Oh I got that OP, you're not alone. This was my workplace (albeit part time) of 10 years. No one bothered to leave me a card or a present on my final day. I bought them nice chocolates and a card, and I felt very hurt.

But this wasn't the first time: same for when I got married and had kids. And yet they collected money for others' birthdays! How rude of them?!

I always tried to be kind and had chats with staff here and there. I didn't become particularly close to anyone there but I always went to Xmas do's etc.

You're not alone OPFlowers

PinkArt · 07/12/2022 20:20

Is it common to leave on a Wednesday where you work? Grasping at straws a bit but if it's a Mon-Fri, 9-5 I wonder if it just didn't quite compute for them. Less straws to grasp if you do shift work.
Sorry OP, that sucks.

anexcellentwoman · 07/12/2022 20:30

I know someone who worked as a TA in a secondary school for over twenty five years. She left when she reached retirement age and no one arranged anything. There was a fairly new SENCO and generally it was down to Heads of Department to organise staff leaving cards.
She never even got a mention in the school newsletter. Staff turnover was high and the Head was new. School can be very lonely places for staff.

PreparationPreparationPrep · 07/12/2022 20:31

That must feel really crap OP. Usually a friendly colleague would initiate it and if not then your manager.

GaggleOfSwans · 07/12/2022 20:38

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Notreallyawaitress · 07/12/2022 20:41

Same thing happened to me after 5 years, no acknowledgement from my coworkers at all - I was always giving cards & gifts to everyone else too. Fortunately my new job is much better and I hope yours is too

Blowyourowntrumpet · 07/12/2022 20:41

That's absolutely shit and anyone would be upset. I really hope you're OK.

Yutes · 07/12/2022 20:44

My work does mental things like has a tea for someone that has only been with us for 6 weeks and can’t give a get well soon card to someone that has been off sick for 2 months.

woodhill · 07/12/2022 20:44

So sorry OP

I know exactly how you feel and very thoughtless of them

ScottBakula · 07/12/2022 20:49

That is really crap of them.
The only thing I can think of is that they did not realise you were leaving mid week / not the end of the month, most people ( i think ) would leave on a Friday or at the end of the month

Nat6999 · 07/12/2022 20:55

When I was finished at the Civil Service after 27 years I didn't even get a card or anything, had always put in collections for other staff leaving & sent cards, it felt awful but in the end I just thought stuff them.

IntentionalError · 07/12/2022 20:59

Ouch. Anyone would be gutted about that. It demonstrates that you are better off out of that place. I hope your new colleagues are a better bunch of people.

tuvamoodyson · 07/12/2022 21:07

Katkinsgreyy · 07/12/2022 20:05

I once worked somewhere for 3 months. On my last day I got a card and chocolates!

Well, if the OP was feeling bad before I’m sure this must have cheered her right up!

LadySpencer123 · 07/12/2022 21:07

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foxy86 · 07/12/2022 21:07

Yeah, that is really rubbish of them!
we had someone leave last week who had only been here a year and we all put in a collection for her where she got gin, chocolates and flowers. We have someone retiring this month as well and we have a collection for her as well. Even the tight arse higher ups have put in the collections

i can’t believe those who have worked to retirement up thread haven’t been acknowledged either, that is just rubbish!

WishingWell5 · 07/12/2022 21:10

My OH worked somewhere for almost 15 years, as loyal as they come. Got nothing on his last day. It says everything about them, not you.

MajorCarolDanvers · 07/12/2022 21:10

Absolutely shit of them and very bad manners

Summerfun54321 · 07/12/2022 21:12

Yeah that’s shit but I’ve learnt over the years if you want to be acknowledged, you have to make a little effort yourself like bring in a cake, arrange drinks etc. Sometimes things do slip through the next and people do need a little prompt and it’s no reflection on how much they value you personally OP, it’s just bad organisation or communication on their part.

Summerfun54321 · 07/12/2022 21:12

*through the net

Wonderwoman333 · 07/12/2022 21:15

This happened to me after 9 years. Not even a card. Sorry this has happened to you as it is very hurtful.
I am much happier now in my new job though and it meant that I had no regrets about leaving.
I hope you have much nicer colleagues in your new job

80sMum · 07/12/2022 21:15

YANBU. I hope your next group of colleagues is friendlier than the last.

jamira · 07/12/2022 21:16

Card - maybe not but a verbal goodbye and well wishing- yes. YANBU. Did you just up and leave? Presumably someone said something good luck related?

Dixiechickonhols · 07/12/2022 21:18

That’s crap you aren’t unreasonable at all. Good luck in new job. I wonder if they didn’t realise it was your last day.

CathyorClaire · 07/12/2022 21:21

I had this but suspected it would happen as they'd left gifts out prominently for the rest of the team the previous two Christmases with mine being glaring by its absence.

I got my revenge after I resigned by whingeing disingenuously to a bigwig who I knew would report back while the official response was an invitation to the grievance procedure.

Wasn't going to happen when I'd accomplished what I wanted 😀

supernovachampagne · 07/12/2022 21:22

Oh bloody hell that is shitty
I am sorry
Tell us about your new job..

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