To think my racist SIL should consider another profession?

[Adventcalendargobbler]

I’ve known my SIL (35) for just over 10 years. She’s currently at the tail end of her psychology degree, and is aiming for a career as a psychologist.

She’s a very self absorbed, braggy person anyway, and constantly use unnecessary vocabulary when talking - e.g. using really obscure scientific/medical names for things in a casual conversation.

She’s adamant that she’s going to go on to earn 80k+ as a psychologist, however she is extremely racist, homophobic, and slut shames other women.

I don’t understand how it’s possible or ethical for someone to work in that field while having such awful views of people? It’s a common occurrence for her to make awful racist slurs about people!

Do people in this field have to be assessed before being let out into the wild to do their job? I’d be devastated if I knew my therapist (or whatever it is that she’ll end up doing) was not only judging me for my race/sexual orientation, but didn’t like me because of it.

I’ve told her before that her views and comments are bang out of line, but she just calls me a bore who can’t take a joke, and “obviously” she wouldn’t say this in front of people.

AIBU to think this, or am I being a bore who should keep her nose out?

Are you for real?

She can think whatever she wants. As long as she’s professional with patients that’s what matters. Just say ‘what you’re saying makes me uncomfortable and I’m not going to engage with you’ (or words to that effect) I hate to say it, but she probably doesn’t agree with some/all of your views and she Doesn’t have to. Just because you’re offended doesn’t mean you’re right.

No, I absolutely do NOT believe she can
However, if she does not spew her hate in public then I don’t see what she could be reported for

If you bother to read what this woman has actually said then I dont see how there could be any decent human being who could argue OP isn’t “right”

.

Easy to spot the racists and homophobic people on this thread. No surprises with quite a few of the usernames.

I would cut her out of my life OP. She’s a cunt.

@Feelallright well counsellors and psychologists need to be registered with the BPS or BACP, so that’s not completely accurate. If they don’t have certification, they’re a fraud. Anyone can go about calling themselves whatever they want, doesn’t mean they are. It’s up to the potential service user to check.

You don't think it's objectively wrong to use racial slurs and say “good, one less to worry about” in the context of a murdered black man?

Interesting.

As long as people abide by those laws, then however obnoxious others find their views, they reserve the right to think what they like.

The idea that you could lose a job because of wrongthink is straight out of 1984 and quite terrifying.

Just typing that makes me fear that people assume I am racist or homophobic.

Wow. Ever heard of unconscious biases? She may “think” them but such strong views do/will come out and can be dangerous especially if she is working with vulnerable people. There are already too many medical professionals that treat certain groups horrendously while they are seeking help and at their most vulnerable. If she is going to work for the NHS, she will most likely be seeing the very groups she hates. She could cause real and irreversible harm.

The people throwing out clichés like 'thought crime' and 'wrongthink' are completely missing the point.

This isn't about whether people harbouring racist, homophobic or misogynistic views should get jobs, this is about the appropriateness of a specific person who harbours and has shared extremely racist, homophobic and misogynistic views going into a field where they would be providing mental health support to very vulnerable people. Some of whom may be non-white and/or struggling with their sexuality.

There is no requirement for a counsellor to be registered with either of those bodies if they are working solely in private practice.

I'm registered with the BACP. In any case that's a requirement for the EAP organisation I do some contract work for. Some counsellors register with the NCS. Some choose not to be registered with a membership organisation.

No, they don’t. Organisations like the BACP are just membership clubs with a minimum standard. You can choose to join them, but you don’t have to.

A friend of mine is a working clinical psychologist and although she's not racist or homophobic (as far as I know), she is extremely naive, judgmental and has absolutely no understanding of anyone neurodiverse. Has also been known to call an anxious child "ridiculous".

Another person I know is a private psychotherapist who is racist, homophobic, disablist, you name it. Very dismissive of many difficulties that people face. It actually bothers me quite a lot that she is who people turn to in a time of need.

A few have already made similar assumptions on this thread.

It IS possible to despise racism and all who stand for it, and still be deeply concerned about the way our censorious culture is currently heading. There's a thread right now which is presently unpicking all the complex nuances of this difficulty:

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4693246-to-think-the-uk-has-sleep-walked-into-having-new-blasphemy-laws

The maxim 'if you have nothing to hide you have nothing to fear' doesn't cut it anymore. One day you might inadvertently put your foot in it, however unintentionally. We've all done it - to err is human and sometimes expectations as to what is and isn't the right way to refer to something can change - but we might at least have been allowed to learn from those mistakes (and if we have any sense, we will). Intention isn't important, it's how your utterance has been perceived that matters. And whilst it's right that this is the case, it should make a difference as to whether someone's dropped a clumsy clanger (ie used a phrase with racist connotations you didn't know it had - 'selling down the river' being one problem one - or racially profiled someone AKA Susan Hussey, who fully deserved denouncing as the racist she so clearly is.

Now, whatever the nuance or context, you'll likely be given a bad name and hung with no questions asked.

That isn't what this thread is about though.

To repeat:

This isn't about whether people harbouring racist, homophobic or misogynistic views should get jobs, this is about the appropriateness of a specific person who harbours and has shared extremely racist, homophobic and misogynistic views going into a field where they would be providing mental health support to very vulnerable people. Some of whom may be non-white and/or struggling with their sexuality.

But the question is purely hypothetical. The woman doesn't even have a first degree. She hasn't undergone the years of training it would take her to become a clinical psychologist.

OP is ruminating over something that hasn't - and likely won't - ever happen. SiL doesn't exactly sound over-endowed with critical thinking and might not even come out of university with the grades necessary to progress.

There's always the chance that SiL might - doubtful but possible - learn how unpleasant her views are and rethink them before she's anywhere near gaining professional status. Okay so that's pie in the sky, glittery unicorn thinking, but no more so than OP getting so concerned about a situation that 'might' one day happen, but hasn't.

In the meantime, OP apparently happily continues associating with her. Such a woman would not enter under my roof, have anything to do with my children, or be indulged in conversation with me.

That isn't what this thread is about though.

I'm aware what the thread is about, but thanks ever so for the explanation.

Interesting.

The fact that SIL is considering a career in psychiatry isn't hypothetical though. She's obviously serious enough about it that she's investing in the relevant qualifications. Although I agree 100% that she sounds severely lacking in the critical thinking skills to actually succeed.

I guess my issue is that this thread has been hijacked by people who, rather than actually considering the specific topic at hand, have just gone on rants about censorship in the workplace (which they seem far more concerned about that a person who apparently rejoices in the murder of black people).

She isn’t considering a career in psychiatry, though. She’d have to be a proper medical doctor first. She’s doing completely the wrong degree.

The fact that SIL is considering a career in psychiatry isn't hypothetical though. She's obviously serious enough about it that she's investing in the relevant qualifications.

No, she's not. Read the thread. Psychiatry is a medical specialism requiring years of training for people with a medical degree. Psychology is one of the most popular undergraduate degree subjects in the UK. Very few psychology graduates become clinical psychologists. Simply having a degree in Psychology means very little.