Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To fart in front of DH?

145 replies

Passthecheeseboard · 03/12/2022 00:23

So been together for 5 years, and we are now completely comfortable with each other, this includes bodily functions. I thought this was normal… But talking to a friend and she has never heard her partner break wind their entire relationship (3 years) and so she doesn’t either… I can only imagine they must be sitting together with sore tummys waiting for the other to leave the room for a discreet moment 🤣

So am I being unreasonable? Is there such thing as being too comfortable in a relationship?

OP posts:
HeddaGarbled · 03/12/2022 01:21

Problem is, you don’t know how smelly it’s going to be before you let rip, and it’s not pleasant to be subjected to, if it’s a smelly one. The occasional accidental one, fine, but it’s not that difficult to wait until you’re in a separate room.

Risslan · 03/12/2022 01:24

Generally no, and he makes an effort not to either but there's no expectation that either of us needs to be getting out of bed every 5 minutes if we've had a curry.

I dont understand why you'd want to release the gaseous contents of your bowels near someone if it's easy enough to be courteous and leave the room.

SnapCrackleandExplode · 03/12/2022 01:29

@student86
I found out I was lactose intolerant when I started uni (as a mature student also) because of all the lattes I was drinking. I'd buy one before class and another probably in the break and I'd be trailing behind the other girls discreetly trying to break wind lol

Original poster
Passthecheeseboard · 03/12/2022 02:57

HeddaGarbled · 03/12/2022 01:21

Problem is, you don’t know how smelly it’s going to be before you let rip, and it’s not pleasant to be subjected to, if it’s a smelly one. The occasional accidental one, fine, but it’s not that difficult to wait until you’re in a separate room.

You can normally tell by the heat of it though, if your stomach is upset and the fart feels hot then you know it’s going to be evil… in which case it’s only polite to leave the room.🤢

But your every day normal loud and proud farts shouldn’t be too offensive to let out in front of your partner 🤔

OP posts:
PepsiMaxAholic · 03/12/2022 03:08

Passthecheeseboard · 03/12/2022 00:37

Once when I had an upset stomach I did one in bed that was so evil it actually woke DH up, it was literally the worst thing I had ever smelled … he was like trying not to puke and jumping out of bed saying ‘oh my God what is that?’ Holding his hand over his mouth…

I was really embarrassed because we hadn’t been together long so I lied to him and told him he farted in his sleep. He was mortified and really apologetic.

To this day he still thinks he was responsible for the legendary evil fart 🫣

This has me creased up with laughter 😂😂😂. I did that too once. DH was asleep with his head under the duvet and I farted. It smelled horrendous, even to me 😂. All of a sudden I hear him sniffing and he said "have you farted?" I just burst out laughing and he put the fan on to blow it back in my direction.

We don't really care, we regularly fart in front of each other. We have the same sense of humour though and find them funny.

Hawkins001 · 03/12/2022 03:12

Passthecheeseboard · 03/12/2022 00:23

So been together for 5 years, and we are now completely comfortable with each other, this includes bodily functions. I thought this was normal… But talking to a friend and she has never heard her partner break wind their entire relationship (3 years) and so she doesn’t either… I can only imagine they must be sitting together with sore tummys waiting for the other to leave the room for a discreet moment 🤣

So am I being unreasonable? Is there such thing as being too comfortable in a relationship?

You could always do an amber choc log so.to speak ?

dolor · 03/12/2022 03:45

There is definitely a farting theme on Mumsnet of late.

🤓

User839516 · 03/12/2022 03:49

Been with my DH for 16 years, have 3 children, don’t ever fart in front of each other. Or go to the toilet in front of each other!

Thursa · 03/12/2022 03:53

Been married almost 38 years, together for 40. Two kids. We don’t fart in front of each other, and we’ve never used the toilet at the same time.

savethatkitty · 03/12/2022 03:55

I think its perfectly fine. On the other hand, in my 44 years I have never heard my mother fart, so I'm pretty sure my father hasn't either, in almost 50 years of marriage.

FrozenGhost · 03/12/2022 04:24

I suppose everyone is different, I've been with my DH for 8 years and previously have been in a 5 year LTR, I never did that in either relationship. I just think it's gross and never would. If one slipped out by accident it wouldn't be a big deal but I can't imagine sitting there just farting away.

MistyRock · 03/12/2022 04:40

FrozenGhost · 03/12/2022 04:24

I suppose everyone is different, I've been with my DH for 8 years and previously have been in a 5 year LTR, I never did that in either relationship. I just think it's gross and never would. If one slipped out by accident it wouldn't be a big deal but I can't imagine sitting there just farting away.

I agree with this. I was brought up with a farting dad and a farting sister and brother. They all thought it was hilarious. I'm more like my mum and I don't find it particularly funny. My husband farts in front of me, fine usually unless there's food around. I just find it uncouth tbh. Why would I want to advertise my bad smells to everyone? I wouldn't have a poo in front of anyone either. A quick wee in an emergency yes. I wouldn't walk around with hair remover on my upper lip either. Some things are best kept private. Just to add I do have stomach issues (IBD) and I'd still rather keep it to myself and go to the bathroom/hold it in.

sykadelic · 03/12/2022 04:54

Married 13 years. I know we pass wind in our sleep, but we do not consciously pass wind in front of each other. It's just a respect thing.

avamiah · 03/12/2022 04:58

I used to do a lot of running as I did half marathons and the London marathon many years ago.
I would go out running at least 4/5 days a week with my husband , and anybody who has done long distance training knows that you would always take a energy drink with you and unfortunately it could make you want to wee and sometimes do the the “other “ but only on a rare occasion ,
So I have had to stop and find a bush many times whilst he waited for me .🫣

QuizzlyBears · 03/12/2022 05:14

sykadelic · 03/12/2022 04:54

Married 13 years. I know we pass wind in our sleep, but we do not consciously pass wind in front of each other. It's just a respect thing.

Agreed. We know it happens sometimes when sleeping, but other than that we don’t do it in front of each other. And the pp who suggested it’s a form of intimacy - nooooo. I think it’s really unclassy and actually, as an ongoing thing that happened deliberately, would put me off my DP.

Mynewchairhasarmrests · 03/12/2022 05:32

Been together 18 years and I have never farted in front of DH. He’s seen me give birth more than once and we are extremely close but we don’t do that in front of each other. He knows I find it revolting so although sometimes one slips out for him he won’t do it on purpose. I really do not see how releasing the foul smelling gas in our nether regions would add to our relationship and am bemused that some people seem to think it’s a sign of intimacy and a strong relationship - it’s a disgusting habit!

PepsiMaxAholic · 03/12/2022 05:41

Mynewchairhasarmrests · 03/12/2022 05:32

Been together 18 years and I have never farted in front of DH. He’s seen me give birth more than once and we are extremely close but we don’t do that in front of each other. He knows I find it revolting so although sometimes one slips out for him he won’t do it on purpose. I really do not see how releasing the foul smelling gas in our nether regions would add to our relationship and am bemused that some people seem to think it’s a sign of intimacy and a strong relationship - it’s a disgusting habit!

Some people just find it funny. Me and DH have some proper laughs over it until we are crying. I couldn't imagine holding it in to the point of having a tummy ache especially in my own home.

MissCrowley · 03/12/2022 06:25

I was with my SO around 2 weeks before I got caught pregnant with my DD. As soon as we'd agreed that we were staying together and keeping the baby we relaxed a lot more and farts was the first thing that happened. No way could I hold farts in for 3 years.

blubberball · 03/12/2022 06:40

DP rarely farts in front of me, if he does, it's usually in his sleep. I smile quietly to myself. I find it really respectful of him not to force them out in front of me. I try to respect him in return, but sometimes I laugh so much I fart. I sometimes fart myself awake. So, it happens and it's ok, but we don't force them out in front of each other.

EmmaDilemma5 · 03/12/2022 06:46

Call me old fashioned but I think purposely farting in front of anyone is rude and gross.

Accidentally/unexpected? Normal, not a problem.

On purpose? Eugh. If I feel one coming, I'll go to the toilet or another room.

connie26 · 03/12/2022 06:51

DH and I have always done it in front of each other at home. We might tease each other about it sometimes. It's really nothing to feel embarrassed about when you're a close couple surely?

LargeglassofRosePlease · 03/12/2022 06:53

Passthecheeseboard · 03/12/2022 00:37

Once when I had an upset stomach I did one in bed that was so evil it actually woke DH up, it was literally the worst thing I had ever smelled … he was like trying not to puke and jumping out of bed saying ‘oh my God what is that?’ Holding his hand over his mouth…

I was really embarrassed because we hadn’t been together long so I lied to him and told him he farted in his sleep. He was mortified and really apologetic.

To this day he still thinks he was responsible for the legendary evil fart 🫣

This made me laugh 😂 I would have been crying with laughter and given the game away! He would have known it was me!

Personally , yes I do it in front of my husband. Discreetly. Not full on let rip ones.

😂

Wam90 · 03/12/2022 06:58

Passthecheeseboard · 03/12/2022 00:37

Once when I had an upset stomach I did one in bed that was so evil it actually woke DH up, it was literally the worst thing I had ever smelled … he was like trying not to puke and jumping out of bed saying ‘oh my God what is that?’ Holding his hand over his mouth…

I was really embarrassed because we hadn’t been together long so I lied to him and told him he farted in his sleep. He was mortified and really apologetic.

To this day he still thinks he was responsible for the legendary evil fart 🫣

Hahahahah this is the best thing ever 😂😂😂

MistletoeandBaileys · 03/12/2022 07:04

My now husband in the early days of our relationship wouldn’t fart around me at all. But once he was fast asleep in bed it was like Denis the menace had let off boxes of stink bombs under the covers!!

Now we have no pretence about it. We don’t go out of our way to force one out on each other or anything but if one slips out it slips out!

Much better to have it out than in!

TheRookie · 03/12/2022 07:06

Personally, I wouldn't sit and fart intentionally in front of any one, including my partner. Neither of our parents do either. Obviously sometimes you can't help it but to actually sit and fart on the sofa is weird.