Aibu to think that 36 is still relatively young to have a child?

[Hdaniels11]

I have a Dd who's 9 and a Ds who's 6 and i'm thinking of having another baby. I'm 36 now and was amazed when i find out once you turn 34 you are classed as a geriatric mother! I always thought 25-38 was the prime time to have babies. Aibu to think you shouldn't be classed as an older mother until you are in your 40s?

It's not young in reproductive terms many people spend ages TTC at 36. For a 3rd baby it's fine though.

I had all my three children between 38-42 with no intervention or issues in fact two were unplanned one I was on the injections.

I know many women who conceived easily within this age bracket

You're confusing medical terms with societal terms. In medical terms, 35+ is "geriatric". I had both of mine at 35+ and it was fine but several friends had real fertility problems at the same age.

Society wise, plenty of 35+ have children, particularly working parents who focus on their career earlier.

I cannot imagine having a child in my 30s unless you have no choice. I always find it a bit strange when other mums say things along the lines of: 'oh, we have been together since we were teenagers but we waited till we were 40 to have DCs because we were achieving financially security'. I guess they must be the lucky ones who still managed to do it late or is egg freezing more common than I realise?

Speak for yourself. Just had my second at 35 and didn't feed old. Just turned 36 and still young. 🤣

I had my first when I was 37 so I agree that to me 36 is not old enough to have your third baby!! The average age to have your first is I think 31 or something like that so having your 3rd by 36 is definitely on the younger side.

Even in previous years plenty of women gave birth at this age but it might have been their 5th or 7th or something.

However that's society. Biologically your fertility constantly declines (from your kid twenties onwards I believe but I could be wrong) and I suppose that 35 plus might be the age when you get monitored more during pregnancy as you are more likely to have complications.

One of my friends had “elderly primagravida” on her notes when she was 26 😂

@Croque completely agree with you.

That is young to be a grandparent to be fair.

If you're classed as a geriatric mother, it's due to a tonne of medical research that puts you in the higher risk category. Fair or not doesn't come into it.

I wouldn't agree with the 25-38 age range at all. I'd say it was more late teens/20s.

However, if you're looking to expand your family, then that's up to you and your partner ☺️

I'm in my 30s, can I stop bothering with contraception then , it's a pain.

That might have been the case for you but science says it's stasticially much more likely to struggle to get pregnant and stay pregnant at 38-42. If circumstances allow relationship is good partner wants to TTC career is good.it's better to attempt TTC number 1 before the age of 35.

Think it depends where you live. Pad had kids in my 20s and a third child at 43. My brother's ex-girlfriend broke up with him in their 20s because he didn't want a kid without them both being in decent jobs and she considered that if she hadn't had 3 kids by 25, she'd be "over the hill" (she already had one - different dad).

36 is not old to have your third child. If you were trying for your first, you might be one of the older ones in your ante-natal class but round my neck of the woods, that's also a normal age to have a first child.

As others have said, it's a medical term (although some use the term advanced maternal age now). In societal terms it seems to be fairly normal. Wouldn't personally have a child at that age but each to their own.

It's normal but medically they class it as geriatric. Don't let that dissuade you @Hdaniels11

Im 36 and expecting my third anytime now.

I think when you consider that lots of women don’t start a family until 29/30 now, if you want more than 2 you’d be hard pressed to do it before 35??

I have lots of friends my age expecting their second or third. I haven’t been referred to as “advanced maternal age” at all in this pregnancy

only you can decide, but I don’t think it’s too old at all for a third pregnancy

Some of us don't have any choice in the matter. 🙄 Obviously lucky with your fertility.

If 37 is indeed 'too old' though, how are ANY 37 year old women getting pregnant?

Me and my sister in law both had baby girls in the same year. I was 23 and she was 37.

Both girls off to secondary school in September and both fairly typical hormonal year 6s. My sister in law is really struggling at the moment with menopause!

I thank my lucky stars that’s not me. My year 6 drives me round the bend at age 34 I don’t need menopause in the mix! Rather her than me put it that way.

I was 34yo when I had my last child. If I'm not the oldest mum in my ds's class then I am right up there in the top two. So, yeah, I think it is a pretty long way from relatively young.

No. I was 37 and 39 and feel earlier would have been much better. I went straight into peri. Not fun!

Had my 3rd at 34 and it was so hard compared to 27 and 28! I felt old. But if I didn't have the older ones I wouldn't know any different. And I was really anaemic so if that had happened with 1 or 2 doubt I would have been so desperate for no3, I thought pregnancy was so easy just a little bit tired... not that one!

It's a clinical term related to the biological age of reproduction, not the individual. At 36 the reproductive years are closer to their end than their beginning.

A third child at 36 was pretty normal or at the younger end amongst my peers and our children are grown up now.

I was a geriatric multigravida for the children I bore after 35 but I was not a geriatric primagravida when I bore the first because I was under 35.

YABU. There's nothing wrong with it, but I really doubt anyone would think 36 is "relatively young" to have a baby.