Social media attention seekers

[circumnavigater]

I know this is probably contentious, but does anyone else get fed up of friends that frequently feel the need to update/show off on social media?

I'm at an age where most Facebook friends don't really bother with it all-maybe an occasional post every so often, that's absolutely fine, I like seeing the updates. But there's a few people I know who literally post weekly, if not more. Child's birthday (fine), amazing family holiday and how lucky they are, child's first haircut, baby started weaning, baby's new shoes, child had covid, house move, anniversary, mothers day, Father's Day, trip to the park, Ukraine war, end of maternity leave, Halloween pics, meal at the pub, family BBQ.... you name it, it's posted. I mean, surely to post so often, it's just blatant attention seeking? What is the psychology behind this? Are they really that insecure they require validation from others on a weekly basis? In their 30s? I have a child and I'm immensely proud but don't feel the need to post so frequently.

This is just a rant really, I need to get it off my chest, please don't tear me to shreds!!! Yes I know I can mute and I do!!!

Mines full of adverts nowadays! I culled my friends list so maybe that's why!

I find it especially tone deaf when they post about their frequent holidays abroad

Lots of people use social media to record their lives. Photos. Check ins etc. It's a modern diary and photo album. Doesn't bother me. I like a busy feed. And I enjoy seeing what friends are up to

If you don't like it unfollow.

Yep. It's the whole point of Facebook. Unfollow people who make you jealous.

i had to unfollow a few, it just gets too much. What bugs me is excessive use of exclamation marks!!!!!!!!! Everyone does it!!!!!!! But you only need one! 😉😂

Yeah, I’ve got one friend in particular who does this. Luckily I like her so I don’t mind.

It’s their social media page, they can do what they like. Unfollow if you don’t like it.

As a PP said, some people do this for themselves, so they can revisit it and get memory reminders in years to come. Just unfollow them if their usage doesn't match yours. I have a very old friend who I love dearly, but he uses FB to document his political rants and criticisms, which drives me insane. I in followed him years ago and he knows why!

I don’t really know why you care. It’s the same as anything else in the world, everyone is different and so everyone will use social media slightly differently. Some post everything, some post little, there’s no real right or wrong. It’s nice that they’re happy.

I like seeing interesting things people do to (holidays -just not a million photos-, weddings etc) but I don't get the need to post every movement. Someone on my Instagram can't even go to the cinema without 3-4 stories going up (in the car, of her popcorn, of her ticket, the opening screen). A bit odd.

It’s kind of the whole point of social media… and you can unfollow pretty easily. YABU

I think YABU because weekly isn't much. You should try being friends with some of my rellies, I get 50-60 photos of the same event from every angle, every day, on about 4 different SM platforms. It's a deluge. And the 2am "I can't breathe" or "in A+E" ones.

I suppose the real question is, what are you on SM for if you don't want to hear from your friends about what they're up to about once a week? Do you prefer groups? Pages? What gets you to keep checking it?

I used to post a lot more on Instagram in particular but just don't have the time these days - it's a shame though as I saved all my posts and it's nice to look back and be like "oh I'd forgotten we'd gone to that place" or even mundane things like what I'd had for dinner

I very rarely post on Facebook and I find the oversharing quite alarming, especially about kids. A parent I know from school frequently posts pictures of their child's excrement (really!!) online. It's absolutely horrendous - maybe they think it's funny?

Social media is for all those you mentioned. Yes it is annoying I agree. So come off social media or unfollow. Those 'attention seekers' are just using it like it's meant to be used!

That's the whole point of social media.

A lot of people don't need to share their lives - probably because they have lots of people around them to celebrate, commiserate, just tell an amusing anecdote to etc.

I don't have that. I live alone. I holiday alone. Posting things on Facebook is the equivalent of sharing news with someone to me. I post a lot and I like to see other people's posts. I don't want a feed full of adverts.

I do have a self imposed rule that all posts have to be either vaguely amusing, interesting or informative though.

My personal bugbear is posts wishing people's children happy birthday in a way where it's directed to the child. Their children aren't on facebook. So it makes no sense to me. Just tell them? But each to their own.

I've never been one for doing it myself as I don't post much, but I love seeing my friend's posts/holiday snaps/Christmas pics/birthday pics/family pics etc.

I mean it's down to them what they choose to do with their accounts and as you say, you can always mute them.

Yep, definitely mixed views. When I was younger, people my age posted more often. This lessened for most as we got older. It seemed most kind of 'grew out' of the need to post frequently. I do find the psychology of it quite interesting though-the way you're kind of hidden behind a screen but at the same time post very personal stuff online...

I deleted my social media account years ago and I just find the idea of it really bizarre now. I couldn't imagine myself doing it again

This, I do this and for me it's been brilliant. I'm bipolar and joined Facebook in 2008. If I'm having a wobble or doubting my mental health then I can look at the same time of year in past years and see if it's a typical thing or something of concern. I always seem very productive the week the kids go back to school but am often Ill the week after that. The clocks changing KILLS me and cares hibernation. It's been invaluable in me realising that I have seasonal affective disorder and when looked at from that angle, I possibly have ADHD and SAD and may not in fact be bipolar.

I also like that I can share photos, stories etc with family and then I don't feel so bad about not going to visit them in person 😁

Even if it is attention seeking; when you boil down to it, what’s actually wrong with enjoying or wanting some attention and seeking it in an appropriate place? Which social media is, it’s almost entirely its purpose. Humans are social creatures who have evolved to seek out approval from those around them and create social bonds. We’d have died out long ago if we weren’t good at generating our tribe’s approval. I think it’s connected to the British tendency to be self deprecating and pretend you’re nothing special that the idea of attention seeking being a negative trait derived from.

If they were posting about it in a WhatsApp group, messaging you directly, or shouting it out in the street then yes, fine to find it offensive. Facebook, not so much.

Yep. It's the whole point of Facebook.

The whole point of facebook is access to data 😆

I personally think it's the absolute height of insecurity.

The only thing that boils my piss is the check in at the hospital with no other information....followed by the obligatory "U OK hun?" comments

Even if it is attention seeking; when you boil down to it, what’s actually wrong with enjoying or wanting some attention and seeking it in an appropriate place?

Tbf people judge this & bragging in real life far more strongly then they do on FB.

Agreed. It's fine to brag on SM but not in real life. Weird really