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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I being tracked?

68 replies

Lovelittlethings · 22/11/2022 19:48

I'm in the process of separating from my husband. He is currently looking for somewhere to live and in the meantime we have each been spending time away from the house to give each other space. I live in London and last week I went to stay in Manchester for 2 days for work as we have offices there. Usually i stay in hotels but last week I stayed with a friend who lives nearby, and the week before i did the same. Last week, I called home to speak to our children and he asked questions about where I was etc. I gave vague replies as no longer feel i need to be held accountable for every move. He then relayed my full movements to me while I was away and the previous week - how I'd worked at a house in x Street, gone to the office the following day, returned to the house in the evening etc. He says he got this information from the messages we've sent to each other. We only use WhatsApp but from all the research I've done, I have no idea how he's managed to get this level of information. I feel freaked out and don't know what to do next. Aibu to think I've somehow been tracked? How do I get it to stop?

OP posts:
Randomness12 · 22/11/2022 19:51

I’d guess at an air tag? You need to check your car, bag, clothes, purse. They are tiny little metal discs

1dontunderstand · 22/11/2022 19:51

Do you have find my phone?

Greenshake · 22/11/2022 19:53

If it turns out you are, or this sort of thing continues, I would be taking it to the Police. This is seriously inappropriate behaviour.

mammawho · 22/11/2022 19:55

Crikey. Was he nuts when you were together or is this a recent thing? It does sound as if he is tracking you one way or another :/

Rainbowshine · 22/11/2022 19:57

Do you have any shared devices that would have find my phone or share location settings on them?

Ameadowwalk · 22/11/2022 19:58

FindMyPhone would be my first thought - do you have it switched on or are you on the same account? But even then, it doesn’t store information - you would need to be checking regularly to find someone’s movements, rather than check in where they were at a given time.

i think an iPhone is supposed to alert you if there is an AirTag nearby

Pixiedust1234 · 22/11/2022 19:58

Find my phone app or similar
Tracking tags or similar placed in handbag, coat seams, car
On board car computer

MissEnolaHolmes · 22/11/2022 19:58

Go to the police and report it

EscapeRoomToTheSun · 22/11/2022 19:59

He's lying about it being whatsapp. I would go to the police.

MissEnolaHolmes · 22/11/2022 19:59

Remove locations from your phone or laptop - ask someone to look

Lovelittlethings · 22/11/2022 20:02

I don't have 'find my phone' but just spotted I have Sumsung version of 'find my device'. Will change the password now.

OP posts:
Ameadowwalk · 22/11/2022 20:02

If you go to settings on WhatsApp there is a setting for sharing your live location. I have never used it, but I presume you would know if you had it on.

Lovelittlethings · 22/11/2022 20:03

Randomness12 · 22/11/2022 19:51

I’d guess at an air tag? You need to check your car, bag, clothes, purse. They are tiny little metal discs

Thank you. I didn't know about these, I'll look through my bag.

OP posts:
Glittertwins · 22/11/2022 20:05

I believe AirTags will notify you if they are close by. Hope he isn't tracking like this

carefulcalculator · 22/11/2022 20:05

Yes, it sounds like he is tracking you and that is very serious behaviour, do not minimise this if it turns out he was.

enjoyingscience · 22/11/2022 20:08

Do you have a gmail account? Check in the account to see what devices are logged in and log out of my you think he might have access to. It does sound like he’s tracking you.

ReallygoodyesImfine · 22/11/2022 20:09

Google location history. Turn this off and change your passwords for all Google accounts. Go to the section that shows if other devices are logged in to your account and remove access.

Google Location history will show how long you were at every single place you've been to, how you traveled there, where you walked everything. It's how I caught my husband cheating.

Molehillfromamountain · 22/11/2022 20:09

Could it be your Google account? Mine logs journeys. If you have a connected devices at home he could be following your movements that way.

RandomPerson42 · 22/11/2022 20:11

Delete whatsapp

DohaDragon · 22/11/2022 20:16

Yes an AirTag would tell you that one was following you, it would send an alert to your phone which is meant to be an anti stalker alert.

not sure if Samsung tiles do the same?

i would say that google locations could be a probably culprit. I get an email from google every now and then telling me what my journey history is for the last month. I’m sure if I knew how I could log on and check it more frequently. So has he got the log in details for this somehow?

LeoEisor · 22/11/2022 20:17

Random but do you share Spotify or anything? Found out Google picked up on my partners whereabouts because he used me Spotify lol was totally unaware that was a thing but he uses my account which is linked to my Google account

malmi · 22/11/2022 20:22

Sounds like Google to me. Change your Google password as well as turning off the location tracking

BigScreen · 22/11/2022 20:24

It's not going to be WhatsApp.

Will be either 'find my phone' or a tracking devise or even a spare phone he's planted.

PinkiOcelot · 22/11/2022 20:36

He’s lying. He couldn’t have gotten all of that from WhatsApp.

KaroH · 22/11/2022 20:41

What car do you drive? The app for mine tracks all journeys.