Am I being tracked?

[Lovelittlethings]

I'm in the process of separating from my husband. He is currently looking for somewhere to live and in the meantime we have each been spending time away from the house to give each other space. I live in London and last week I went to stay in Manchester for 2 days for work as we have offices there. Usually i stay in hotels but last week I stayed with a friend who lives nearby, and the week before i did the same. Last week, I called home to speak to our children and he asked questions about where I was etc. I gave vague replies as no longer feel i need to be held accountable for every move. He then relayed my full movements to me while I was away and the previous week - how I'd worked at a house in x Street, gone to the office the following day, returned to the house in the evening etc. He says he got this information from the messages we've sent to each other. We only use WhatsApp but from all the research I've done, I have no idea how he's managed to get this level of information. I feel freaked out and don't know what to do next. Aibu to think I've somehow been tracked? How do I get it to stop?

Well, it confirms that you are making the right decision regarding separation. He is a controlling twat.

Change your password on every app in your phone.

you can pay someone to check for tracking devices. Worth paying for for peace of mind.

id report to the police, tell him you have reported him and tell him if he does it again you’ll be pressing charges.

and tell him to fuck off.

It’ll be find my phone or similar

we all use same cloud account and I can track everyone in my family doen to the house number

They will only notify if you have an iphone. The OP says she has a samsung.

Yes, what bonzaitree said. This is illegal behaviour. He appears to be escalating. Womens Aid can give you advice on staying safe.

Google maps knows where you've been if you have location on. If you are logged into Google on a laptop or ipad he will be able to see - or if he knows your login. I bet it's that. It's not whatapp, it tells you if you are sharing your location.

Honestly, I would download whatever you need off your phone to a hard drive, and then do a full factory reset of your phone. It's a bit nuclear, but the kind of software he might have installed can be hard to find and remove. You need to do a thorough data cleanse of all your devices, phones, tablets, laptops.

When you re-set up your devices, set all apps to not know your location, and turn off any location info you possibly can.

Set new passwords on any apps you download.

Unlink from any of the kids devices, or create a new acount to link to those, with totally unique log in details.
Use complex alpha numeric passworks which are not easily guessable, a random combinaton of letters, numbers and special characters is best.
Reset the passwords on anything you use on your laptop too, but most essentially on your google accounts, facebook accounts, and anything that uses location services.
Dont let him near your phone at any time.

Definitely get legal advice and consider reporting him to the police.

support.google.com/accounts/answer/6179507?hl=en

Can he access your Google account? Google maps on your device logs locations you visit, so change any google password too.

That’s a bit worrying! I would follow everyone else’s advice! How dare he?

Is your car a more recent model? Some have satnav's you can login from a computer to check journeys for mileage and navigation purposes, or tracking software that can be used to locate car if stolen by the owner.

Some social media apps like snapchat if not in ghostery mode can allow contacts to track or request your location. Check your app settings. Same with google, if you logged into google on a shared device then he could be using your google account to track you. Change your password.

If you had a shared home laptop or desktop then you may have at some point linked your phone or other laptop/tablet to a find my device function that your ex has access too, some even work through antivirus software especially where a shared license is installed into multiple devices. Such antivirus software sometimes has a find my device function that allows all devices with installed antivirus to be tracked.

Has your ex ever been alone with your phone? Could he have uploaded tracking software/apps?

Check your bag, jacket and your car for tracking tags/discs.

There are domestic abuse services that will check your technology for stalling software free of charge. Veritas is the brighton company but woman’s aid can likely signpost you to your nearest service. they can also give you information on stalking softwares etc.

You can get an app for your phone that will scan for BLE (bluetooth low energy) devices and locate them. That's the easiest way to find any air tag or tile etc that's he's hidden in your bag or car. I've just had a quick look and there's ones for Android called BLE Scanner and LightBlue.

Google maps paints Picture of your journeys in the history section. So maybe this is what he has looked at?

It could be what's app. If you click the attach icon in a chat it allows you to share your location with the others in the chat but there is also a way of enabling it for longer periods in the settings. Double check all your settings you or he may have enabled it at some point for an indefinite period. If you Google what's app location sharing you'll find what to look for. It could also be lots of other apps if you have switched on location sharing or linked devices at any point.

In what's app go to settings then privacy and it will tell you if live location is enabled for any chats

Yeah my first thought was Google Location History, I turned mine off because I am not happy having that information in the ether., my now Ex Dh was in a right mood for days afterwards and then when I went out and said I was going to X place he said "Well I only have your word for that" and I realised that he had been keeping an eye on me, possibly for months or years. And of course he was projecting as the person who was not where they said they were was in fact him as he was lying cheating abusive prick. So I used the same trick on him and lo and behold.......

On my phone (iPhone) in settings I can see all apps that are using my location and switch off location services, there must be a Samsung equivalent, maybe Google it

Sorry to say this, but studying this behaviour is part of my job. He is tracking you almost certainly; ensure he has no physical access to your devices from now on. Is there anything you own that he set up for you? If so, restore that thing to factory settings; this is a common time for people to install spyware (check for Life360 specifically). There is an Android app that will scan for an airtag, definitely download it and checkairtags are basically consumer stalkerware. As others have suggested, change your passwords for Google, Samsung, and all other social media accounts, and turn "find my" offbut before you do this, check where and on what devices you are logged in, and screenshot it so that you can demonstrate any tracking behaviour. Do you have headphones that have a finding function? check those too. There is an academic called Leonie Tanczer in the UK who studies this stuff, she may have advice available on her website.

I am so sorry he is doing this to you. It's awful.

Please ignore my strikeout up there, it's because I use two dashes for a long dash 🙇

It's most likely some sort of app, as others have said, but bear in mind too the more 'old school' methods of installing a tracking device on a car - illegal without the owner's consent but still fairly easy to do, or hiring a private detective to follow you for a couple of days if you are somewhere different to the usual routine. It's probably the least likely explanation, due to the cost compared to all the free ways to get tracking info via apps these days, but I'm sure private detectives still get a fair percentage of their business from ex-partners trying to 'prove' adultery or some other behaviour that could help strengthen their own case in custody or divorce battles.

My first thought was a tracker on your car.

Do you drive to Manchester?

Did you ask him?! My immediate response would have been 'how the f*%k do you know?'

Do you have your location on snapchat?

Could be google maps. There’s a feature on there that tracks your every move which anyone with your google account details can see.

Didn't realise AirTag tracking only worked with iPhones and not the Samsung. Do you have a trusted friend with an iPhone?