People calling you ‘love’

[FerryYaBerryLa]

Right so I’m late 30s and I feel like this has started happening recently.

I don’t mind it from people much older, but I’ve noticed people younger in their 20s have started to do it, and to be honest it’s pissing me right off 😆

I find it oddly rude tbh. (I know that’s obviously not the intent). Haven’t fully put my finger on it, but feels like it has a patronising, gendered vibe to it.

I feel like it’s the equivalent of calling any man you meet who is 5+ years older than you ‘fella’ or something. ‘You alright fella!’ – weird.

AIBU?

I like it 😁

Are you in Yorkshire? It’s common here. I’ve been here 20 years and it smile makes me smile seeing big burly men calling each other love or flower.

I like it too……x

No, I used to live in Yorkshire though and also love that 😁 My favourite was seeing male bus drivers call each other duck 😄

I like it.

It's darling I don't like. So patronosing.

That's definitely the Yorkshire way 😀
I here pal exchanged a lot.
I miss hearing people being called petal, had a great uncle that said that a lot.

Oh god. I call everyone love. From my big boss to my DC friends. Men & women. I'm not in Yorkshire...

Everyone gets called duck where I'm from

Duck is lovely!

I like it. But then I have only heard it said to both male and female, young, old.
"Darlin" not so much.

I like it. I'm Glaswegian and the standard term of endearment is mostly 'pet', but you will occasionally get 'love' or 'hen' from older men.

I work in a senior role in a very conservative, traditionally male industry (technical management consultancy) and take great pleasure from greeting my (similarly senior) male colleagues with 'hello, princess' (they seem to like it too 😁).

I wince and say 'love? Ouch' or 'love? Wow'. It's rude. It is sarcastic/ patronising and I make it clear the message has been received.

YANBU

I've had to tell a young male colleague to stop calling older female members of staff 'beautiful', 'lovely', 'gorgeous' recently. His excuse is that he is gay and calls everyone it. He doesn't. He doesn't call the men this or the younger female colleagues. It definitely comes across as patronising and sexist - I'm pretty sure he didn't mean it this way but he completely failed to pick up on the [very obvious] bristle vibes so had to be told outright to stop. He seemed very surprised to hear that people do not like it - especially in a professional setting!

I don't mind love in shops as much but, yes, I have definitely noticed that younger people are using it more now. Since the colleague issue it has grated more though.

I like it.

It's a very normal thing to say where I live (not in Yorkshire!). Also, men all get called Mate.
No problem with it myself.

Yes! Totally hear you. That is so funny you say that. I was at an appointment earlier and the guy showing people in (like a government office place) kept calling me young lady. He was about 20–30 years older than me but I noticed he didn’t say it to any of the really young women coming in (a couple would have been 15+ years younger). Why do people think you GAF what they think of your appearance.

Funnily enough I also remember around age 30 chuggers started asking very pointedly “Are you a student! Oh you look that age 😃” Like they expect you to blush happily and hand over your bank details. F* off.

I actually like it.

It depends on the context and the tone really.

A cashier saying "alright love" as they scan your shopping is fine.

A grumpy surly man saying "alright love" when trying to shut me down is not fine.

Um...so I've never heard anyone call anyone fella in my life unless it's talking about a woman's other half.

Starbucks man called me madam the other day! I'm 34 and usually look young although I probably looked wiped out the other day. But then again perhaps madam can be young or old? Certainly posh though!

I don't really like it, mostly because it's gendered and a bit patronising (from shopkeepers, tradesmen etc - it's fine from family members).

I don't think it's an age thing though - I've heard people call me 'love' throughout my life.

I agree with PP who hates 'darling' as well - that is much worse!

I like 'love'. It's bloody 'hun' I can't stand. That does sound patronising to me but there's no logic to my reasoning!

Yeah I occasionally hear it used patronisingly towards older men. Perhaps there’s a better example!

Wow interesting! @FerryYaBerryLa I mean I'll certainly bear it in mind now the next time an older gentleman hacks me off.