People calling you ‘love’

[FerryYaBerryLa]

Right so I’m late 30s and I feel like this has started happening recently.

I don’t mind it from people much older, but I’ve noticed people younger in their 20s have started to do it, and to be honest it’s pissing me right off 😆

I find it oddly rude tbh. (I know that’s obviously not the intent). Haven’t fully put my finger on it, but feels like it has a patronising, gendered vibe to it.

I feel like it’s the equivalent of calling any man you meet who is 5+ years older than you ‘fella’ or something. ‘You alright fella!’ – weird.

AIBU?

and "cock" mostly for children.

Everyone was “cock” to my grandad - were in the northwest of England.

I don’t actually object to being called terms of endearment by older people, it’s when it’s used by cheeky young whippersnappers I find it objectionable!

Exactly, same!! Anyone older it’s nice

One day Hen it won't bother you.

I don't mind 'love' or 'pet' or 'me duck', it's 'darling' I draw the line at

I say it all the time. Everyone does where I am from. Its used in a kind way x

I call DS “love” - he loves it, and gets very cross if I call anyone else love 😂

I think it depends where you from and in context. I know someone from Cornwall who uses it in a very condescending way. But where im from its endearment

I think you must look too friendly. It’s v rare anyone tries it with me.

My dad is from Yorkshire and he calls everyone love, men included. I think it's great.

Odd that no one seems to like Madam/Ma'am but I've lived the states and suppose I got used to hearing it. It's on a par with 'Sir', to my mind more respectful than calling men 'sir' and women 'miss', and was commonly in use over there. I sometimes got a friendly 'honey', but almost always from other women. No idea when the strange Winnie the Pooh spelling of 'hun' started making an appearance.

I also thought 'Duck' was a midlands'ism. I've never heard of it farther north.

I also don't mind betting that in some parts of the country, a man calls another man 'cock' would earn himself a fat lip!

Aww I call people love loads. Men and women. Of all ages! And I get called it a lot too. It's normal up here in my circles in the NW and NE.

Londoner here. Lots of people call others Love round here.

I read this post the other day then was speaking to my 9 year old later about something & he replied "alright love"

🤣

I also call people darling 🤷🏻‍♀️

And sometimes Babe 🤣🙈

But wouldn't call someone I didn't know Babe.

Really can't get offended by it. There are so many worse things you could be called!

My boss sometimes calls me "my dear" but he's old & very posh. Again, I can't get upset by it. It's meant as a term if endearment 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm 28, don't like anyone younger than me calling me it.

Our window cleaner today was trying to persuade me to spend extra each month for him to clean the window frames too. He seemed compelled to end every sentence with 'Lovie', which I'm positive he wouldn't have done to DH and I can't imagine why he thought it was an appropriate way to address a mature woman.

As long as it is said in a nice tone, I don't mind at all.

I did say Hello to Alexa the other day and her reply was 'Aye up me duck'!

I do hope Alexa does that across the whole anglophone world.

It’s specifically when it’s (far) younger people that it irritates me. 😁

Anyone older (or same age), no probs, it’s nice

🤣 or a dragon! 🐲

Yes the age thing does make it sound a bit cringey on occasion OP.
But honestly, if someone is being nice, I just think it's quite funny.

I hate being called babe, but love bab. Other favourites include hen, pet and doll.

Also from Yorkshire and very happy with it. Defo friendly/appreciative when I use it. Thanks Love goes down very well. Totally call blokes it as well as women. Also call both Mate.

There’s a lot in the tone and context, isn’t there? I miss being called ‘hen’ by old ladies on Glasgow buses showing me their purchases from Watt Brothers (showing my age here!). If someone older than me addresses me by a term of endearment when eg thanking me for some minor service like picking something up for them or by way of apology for bumping in to me ‘ sorry love’ , it’s all good. But now I’m middle aged and more aware of sexism and patronage, it does set my teeth on edge in other cases. It’s out of place in professional or trade situations eg don’t like the young guy at cosmetic counter referring to me as ‘dearie’ or ‘sweetheart’ with a patronising air while asking me if I’m sure that’s the lipstick I want because at my age I could do with something a bit brighter …😆I lost no time in disabusing him of the notion that he was being helpful/ likely to upsell.