People calling you ‘love’

[FerryYaBerryLa]

Right so I’m late 30s and I feel like this has started happening recently.

I don’t mind it from people much older, but I’ve noticed people younger in their 20s have started to do it, and to be honest it’s pissing me right off 😆

I find it oddly rude tbh. (I know that’s obviously not the intent). Haven’t fully put my finger on it, but feels like it has a patronising, gendered vibe to it.

I feel like it’s the equivalent of calling any man you meet who is 5+ years older than you ‘fella’ or something. ‘You alright fella!’ – weird.

AIBU?

I can't deal with 'madam' but other than that all feathered animals and other terms of endearment are fine.

Oh I say it all the time! It’s just a term of endearment where I live.

I would actually mind the man trying to get on your nerves less!

It’s in shops that it actually really irritates me 😂 Again though, not from someone older, that’s fine

I feel like it’s a male counterpart to ‘dear’ for older women, although not quite as bad. Maybe it’s regional tho

As an older female Londoner, I catch myself calling young women 'Sweetheart', I try not to in case they are offended but so far no one has expressed offence.

You must be in the same area as me! I'd get children's parents calling me 'duck' when I was a teacher but I drew the line at the children saying it.

Its duck where I live, to males and females. Ova t'wata its love. I like the little regional quirks.

It really doesnt bother me. Its preferable to Madam which does make me feel old!

Everyone around where I live gets called "my lovely" or "my lover".. its just friendly not insulting or rude.

Ha! I used to live in Bristol.

I'm a fan

I call everyone love - it's kind of something I've always been around because of where I've lived and use it myself without thinking. Male, female, young, old, anything in between - I'll call you 'love'. Thanks love, sorry love, excuse me love.....

Its a nothern thing people dont usually mean anything by it , i prefer it to cock which is which is also quite common where i live

My lover? @Dartmoorcheffy really???? 😂

My postman invariably addresses me as "darling". He can lick my stamps any time.

Yes, I know they dont need licking any more but....

I always call people love, darling, sweetheart (reserve that one for younger people).

I'd think someone was a bit of a dick if they got all sarcy in response tbh.

I hate being called ‘love’, to me it’s really patronising and dismissive. It’s what you say when you’re trying to put someone down a bit ( sort of the equivalent of just saying yes dear when you do t really agree with what someone’s saying). I’m sure most don’t really mean it in that way but that’s how I hear it!

I don't mind terms of endearment like "love", "darling" or "sweetheart" at all, as long as they're used in a friendly way, and not to patronise or shut someone down which isn't something I've come across often. One of the lovely receptionists at work calls everyone "flower" regardless of age, level of seniority or gender, and it always makes me smile.

It doesn't bother me really, although I don't use it myself.

Where I grew up it was often duck 🦆 too.

These are often regional differences and mostly not personal or said to offend.

I've decided never to be offended when people are trying to be nice. Life's too short and there are plenty of rude people.

I imagine people who hadn't intended to be rude or sarcastic would just be confused by those responses though, unless you actually followed it up with an explanation.

YANBU. I'm much older than you and hate being called love, dear, duck etc . It's not "friendly", it's patronising, over-familiar and sexist. Why would anyone use a term of endearment for a complete stranger?

Eh, the local term here is "butt"

Those are both really nice! Are you Bristol way? :)

I hate duck and lover, I’m from Lancashire so everyone is love or pal. Cock is another affectionate slang term.