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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To keep parking in front of this "drive"?

342 replies

Droppingthekerb · 22/11/2022 15:40

Sorry it's a long one. I'll start off by saying that due to mobility issues I do drive my children to school which is about 1.5 miles from our house. I do not however qualify for a blue badge.

There are several residential streets near the school where people park to take kids to the school. I imagine it is annoying for the people who live there but there are no restrictions on the road in terms of yellow lines etc and generally I'd say people are respectful of the residents. There are a couple of cars who park overhanging the yellow zigzags and some on bends but for the most part people park at the side of the road and don't block driveways. Dropped kerbs are marked with white lines so it is clear where it is ok to park.

I tend to park on the street one up from the school as usually it is quieter and there's more chance of getting a space. Until recently there was a house on the street that had fallen into disrepair with an overgrown front garden. Over the last couple of months there have been tradespeople coming and doing up the house and now the front garden has been paved over. About 2 weeks ago I parked in front of this house and a man came running out of the house opposite shouting at me that I couldn't park there as I was blocking a drive. I had my kids with me and told him I did not appreciate being shouted at in front of them especially as there was no dropped kerb so it wasn't a driveway. There wasn't a car parked on it either. He stormed off back into his house.

A few days later I saw the space was available and as it was raining there were a lot of extra cars on the school run so spots were at a premium. I parked there again and returned to a note on my car not to block driveways.

I don't park there every time as there are other spaces available often before I get to that spot but last week I was running late for pick up and noticed the space was free again - I was feeling a bit petty too by this point. However, there was a police officer speaking to drivers about their parking to ensure it was safe as it was near a school. I parked there and the police officer stopped me and said she'd had a complaint about people blocking the drive. I pointed out there was no dropped kerb and she immediately said, "Oh, you're absolutely right. Carry on."

This morning it was again the only available space but today there was a car on the drive and seemingly new residents. I parked up as usual to find the man from the house opposite screaming at me again in front of my kids that I was blocking the drive and now the new resident of the house coming out to join in. I tried to keep my cool but it is quite intimidating having 2 men shouting at you in public especially with young children. I said I needed to get the kids to school but they were misinformed if they thought it was a drive as it didn't have a dropped kerb and actually he was in the wrong for driving his car over the pedestrian footpath. Neither of them were listening though as they just kept shouting over the top of me.

When I came back to my car he had taken a photo of it and then a photo of me and told me he was reporting me to the police. I again tried to explain about the lack of dropped kerb and he flat out told me that was not true, that he had the right to create a driveway whereever he wanted and that actually parking on the street full stop (driveway or no driveway) was against the law and he should know because he is a lawyer. I told him he was speaking rubbish and to look on the council website as it is very clear.

Up to now I've parked in other spots if they have been available but AIBU to keep parking in front of this "drive" just to make a point because they have pissed me off?

OP posts:
Piglet89 · 22/11/2022 22:10

This is 50:50 vote split, as well.

England, man. I swear to god.

Pandaparty · 22/11/2022 22:11

So many fucking handmaidens on this thread who think women should rush to accommodate aggressive, shouting, law-breaking men.

TheSnugglyDuckling · 22/11/2022 22:12

I would keep parking there, video him if he started shouting again, photo his car and tell him I’m reporting him to the solicitors regulatory authority/bar standards board.

no dropped curb, not a driveway.

Booklover3 · 22/11/2022 22:16

Pandaparty · 22/11/2022 22:11

So many fucking handmaidens on this thread who think women should rush to accommodate aggressive, shouting, law-breaking men.

It’s not being a handmaiden to state you don’t want your kids exposed to that level of aggression though is it?

cato40 · 22/11/2022 22:20

You sound very petty to continue parking across their drive, they probably applied for the dropped kerb and waiting for that to be done. Your kids won't be traumatised by local residents calling you up for your pettiness. More likely embarassed by your stubborn behaviour. Not a great example to your kids, it cost you nothing parking somewhere else and leave these people in peace.

Piglet89 · 22/11/2022 22:21

I am quite a stubborn person and when someone comes after me I dig my heels in.

OP: I am so stubborn. I am a Taurean 🎯 I am this little angry Northern Irish woman.

BUT the older I get, the more I realise it’s often JUST. NOT. WORTH. IT.

These kinds of petty aggros just are more trouble than they’re worth, seriously.

maddy68 · 22/11/2022 22:22

Legally you are correct but why out yourself and your children through that

Tomatopasta · 22/11/2022 22:26

TheSnugglyDuckling · 22/11/2022 22:12

I would keep parking there, video him if he started shouting again, photo his car and tell him I’m reporting him to the solicitors regulatory authority/bar standards board.

no dropped curb, not a driveway.

I would also be aware of any damage done to your car if you continue to park there. Personally I don’t see the point of why you would continue to park there to be petty. Its one thing to park there as a one off if you’re struggling for space and running late, but to do it on purpose is mean spirited. It’s not technically illegal but that also doesn’t make it right either.

I accidentally parked in front of somebody’s house once, and I came back to find my car had been keyed. The man came out and had a massive go at me, and it was pretty clear it was him. I had no proof though. It’s not the first time it’s happened either…! Parking issues/disputes can cause a lot of problems. Don’t make it worse for yourself.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 22/11/2022 22:46

If everyone on our roads were to park legally on the road there would actually be no where for anyone else to park. So actually it does actually help on our street as it means we aren’t taking up road space.

How does that work, then? Does each person park more than one car on their property? Otherwise, what's the difference in availability between a space that already has a car parked in it and a space that has to be left clear for access?

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 22/11/2022 22:51

Something that I don't recall anybody asking/noting is exactly how you access a self-created 'drive' with a full-height pavement?

Normally, to mount a pavement, you would approach it gradually from the side; but if you're needing to go head-on to get to your 'drive', that's not an easy task unless you have a monster truck. You'd probably have to rev a great deal (and then brake suddenly once you gain purchase), take a 'run-up' and/or risk bashing the front of your car if it's a low one. Sounds very dangerous to me.

antipodeancanary · 22/11/2022 23:00

vivainsomnia · 22/11/2022 16:29

And I think you are getting the law wrong anyway.

Rule 243 of the Highway Code states: 'Do not stop or park in front of an entrance to a property except when forced to do so by stationary traffic.'

The issue with the drop kerb is that THEY shouldn't go over the pavement. Not having one doesn't give you the right to block someone.

It does. It is only an entrance to a property if there is a dropped curb

Peedoffo · 22/11/2022 23:01

You are just being petty and deliberately antagonising them. Dropped kerb or not it's common sense not to park if you are blocking a car in. It's embarrassing for your children just stop doing it.

antipodeancanary · 22/11/2022 23:05

DrMarciaFieldstone · 22/11/2022 18:16

Maybe legally you are right, but you are a massively CF. As if anyone would be fine with this.

I hope they get their kerb dropped asap.

Your mobility issues are not relevant.

The householder is a cheeky fucker for driving over a pavement illegally, and tightfisted to not pay for the dropped curb, and aggressive and entitled to boot

GooglyEyeballs · 22/11/2022 23:19

Tbh sounds a bit like you're enjoying antagonising them which I don't think is decent.

Sparklingbrook · 23/11/2022 00:03

and tightfisted to not pay for the dropped curb

We have no idea whether they’ve paid and are just waiting for the kerb to be done. Councils tend not to be very quick about things.

Duchess379 · 23/11/2022 00:11

You could come back to your car & find the tyres deflated. I wouldn't bother parking there, just find somewhere else.

Longtimelurkerfinallyposts · 23/11/2022 00:21

If the guy really doesn't want anyone else to park on that bit of road (maybe until the dropped kerb gets made, assuming he's waiting for this to happen) then he'd be better off just parking there himself = guaranteed to stop pesky parents using the space.

dinosaurcookie · 23/11/2022 00:22

This has happened to me. I gave the idiot what for back but didn't park there again as I couldn't be doing with the hassle (this was in my residential road at the time). I knew I was in the right though which gave me some solice! If you want a drive then pay for a dropped kerb FFS!

wombat1a · 23/11/2022 01:37

For them to access the garden with the car they must be driving across the pavement which is not allowed unless there is a dropped kerb. Therefore report them to the council.

cookiesbeforepookies · 23/11/2022 01:46

My mum has a blue badge but wouldn’t block a car in like this, even if there is no dropped kerb.

Thepossibility · 23/11/2022 03:02

I wouldn't knowingly put my kids through that for a carpark. Experiencing an adult shouting at their mother is NOT worth a convenient carpark, no matter how justified their mother feels.

donttellmehesalive · 23/11/2022 05:34

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 22/11/2022 22:51

Something that I don't recall anybody asking/noting is exactly how you access a self-created 'drive' with a full-height pavement?

Normally, to mount a pavement, you would approach it gradually from the side; but if you're needing to go head-on to get to your 'drive', that's not an easy task unless you have a monster truck. You'd probably have to rev a great deal (and then brake suddenly once you gain purchase), take a 'run-up' and/or risk bashing the front of your car if it's a low one. Sounds very dangerous to me.

You can buy wedges to create a ramp.

Or he may have a smaller dropped kerb that gave him access to the original one-car driveway, that he can now use to access the entire front garden.

donttellmehesalive · 23/11/2022 05:38

OP says it was the house opposite who came out shouting initially, not the homeowner with the newly created drive.

The new resident only came out when op blocked his car in.

Mummyoflittledragon · 23/11/2022 06:46

I can’t believe some of these comments op. Disability is a protected characteristic.

I have a blue badge op. I can tell you it would make no difference if there was a BB space and you had a badge as it never stopped other idiot parents from using the BB spots in the car park near the school. I used to be allowed to park on school grounds when dd was little but the school changed the main entrance to access over the car park and this privilege was removed. Luckily dd was older primary by then.

shortandpaleandoldandugly · 23/11/2022 07:16

I'm astounded at some of these comments. Are some PPs saying that if every house decided to create a patio on the front lawn there would be absolutely nowhere available to park?! I live in a cul de sac where every house has a drive way but the layout means that there is very limited parking on the road for visitors. One house decided to knock down their front wall and pave over the garden. I'm imagining they believed that they had extended their driveway with absolutely no thought for the fact that they would effectively remove one parking option from the other houses. Most ignore it and park there anyway when necessary which they are perfectly entitled to do. You were not wrong OP. These two bullies were. They should be ashamed of themselves behaving that way towards a lone woman with children next to her.

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