Views on sleepovers?

[Tttnn5]

Is the general consensus now that children don’t sleepover in others houses (except maybe close family like grandparents).
I am not planning on allowing my young children to sleepover anywhere except their grandparents and possibly their aunts house but I wonder when that view started to change?
thinking back now I was never allowed any sleepovers but I know all my friends were

My kids did, but I knew the parents well and their kids came to me too. Started with play dates. It’s a big part of childhood imo but each to their own!

Why not?

My DD thinks sleepovers are the best thing ever. I loved them as a child too. Can see no harm in them.

My DD has them regularly (usually as others' houses as we have a tiny house). Seems to be the norm still?

Mine are not old enough yet but I'm a teacher and when I taught Year 4 last year it was common for the children to have sleepovers, especially for birthdays.

Out of curiosity at what age did your children start having sleepovers? (Obviously for those who's children do go on them)

Depends on age and how well you know the family.

My kids have sleepovers, both at our house and their friends houses. I do know the parents though which makes a big difference.

Due to the risk of abuse at the hands of someone you don’t know too well

Biggest misnomer ever! No sleep is ever had.

My DD loves having friends over to stop and loves stopping at their houses. My DSs also had many friends stopping over.

7/8

We had sleepovers with family/ close family friends very occasionally when we were young. Started being allowed sleepover with friends when I was 9/10 ish. But lots of other people had been doing sleepovers for years before. My little one thinks it sounds great, but he and his friends are a little small at the mo (young end of 4) but maybe in a couple of years?

Are you counting school residentials and things like Scout camp in that?

Sleepvers seem perfectly common where I am, especially for birthday parties.

I do not allow my children to stay out. They have plenty of friends and thankfully their friends parents are also on the same page by never allowing them to stay out either.

None of my friends allow it (other than family of course).

My teenage kids have all been on sleepovers (from around age 9) and we have other children here. So I wouldn't say it's a general consensus at all. I accept there's a small risk, but if we worried about risks the whole time we'd never do anything fun!

Very normal here from about aged eight.

We brief our children on not being alone with adults or doing anything they’re feel is ‘off’ etc. Whether this is another parent or a family member.

Being alone, doesn’t apply to grandma, I’m not being clear.
I don’t see sleepovers as more of a risk than other situations though. Play dates, cubs, etc etc.

I am not a fan but we are having 6 9 yos for a birthday party. We are going to a bounce place then bowling then home for make your own pizza and a movie. I'm hoping they are knackered by that stage and drift off but I assume they will be up till midnight.

How sad. Has the risk of abuse increased or are parents anxieties just being allowed to control everything?

Midnight. Dream on, it'll be 2am if you're lucky!

Well, with this logic I imagine you never let your children out of your sight?

I don’t see why you wouldn’t allow them, within reason. They are fun for the child, a good development opportunity for gaining independence and it could be useful in case you ever need overnight childcare. You can’t expect your child to go to university at 18 never having spent a night away from you, it is important to build this up (along with other ways of gaining independence) over their life.

Most kids do have sleepovers and the ones who don’t miss out, and have over anxious parents. We can’t eliminate all risk. Just let them go once you feel comfortable with the parents. Also, child abusers don’t come out at night! Are you never going to let your children visit friends’ houses?

I do let them out of my site of course but with sleepovers there is an increased change of someone having access to your child when others are sleeping etc

@Tttnn5

do what you feel comfortable with. I never let my primary aged kids sleepover at other peoples houses other than family. They had plenty of friends, did lots of activities, played out on our estate etc but over night was a firm NO in primary school.

Not a chance.

I would maybe consider when older/in secondary school.
just wondering peoples views and wanted to generate a discussion. People love to jump down your throat as if il never let my kids out of my sight.
I work in childrens safeguarding so that probable somewhat skews my views on this.
i also worry about peer on peer abuse