To not like him calling me Mummy...

[Pop12]

My Husband calls me Mummy around the house while my kids are around, so for example he might shout 'Mummy, do you know where are DS's socks are'...etc
If I have given the kids a snack he will say 'Mummy is there one for me!'
I didn't mind when the kids were really young and he was talking with them but I find it a bit creepy he is using it to directly ask me questions.... am I being unreasonable? Is it me thats overthinking it?

Make him watch Bad Sisters, I think it's on Apple TV. Then don't ever let him call you that again!!

I'll say things like "hi daddy!" When he comes home and I'm with our 2 year old. He does similar "good night mummy" but never when not with the baby.

"Is there one for me mummy?" would make me feel a bit sick

Either this is -

• His attempt at being cutsey
• Some kind of attempt at infalntalising himself for some reason. Maybe he wants to be the passive one or maybe it's some kind of weird sexual fantasy.
• A reinforcement of the fact that you are a the primary caregiver in font of the kids in order to offload some parental expectations on you. Aww you've pooed youself? Lets go to mummy to sort that out for you!

I hope for the sake of your marriage it's not the last two.

I always ask on admission who the adult is in relation to the child and their name, but as I paeds nurse in a&e I might have 10-12 kids and parents I’m not gonna remember the adults name whilst also remembering the kids name, condition, whilst making an assessment and also thinking about what’s next on the priority it’s just not possible.

The only couple I've ever heard use Mummy and Daddy for each other are in their late 80s/early 90s.

@Wishiwasatailor I take that on board but funnily enough when the dc were in hospital when they were littlies, the nurses didn't call dh "dad".

Similarly now our parents are elderly when they have been in hospital the nurses have had no difficulty using my name but have infantilised both our mothers by referring to them as "mum". Not even as "your mum".

Oh this thread has just reminded my of my friend who still does this and his kids are young adults now (like 19 and 23). It's just creepy and I can't help but think "bitty" every time I hear him say it to his wife.

Gah. Makes me shudder just thinking about it.

My vagina would unfortunately seal over and form a scab if DH ever referred to me as mummy in that way.

@BeardieWeirdie Omg I have laughed until my ribs hurt and cried tears reading your comment 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I am so gonna find a way to use that line in my OH although it'll be difficult because my OH always calls me babe or darling when he calls out to me but I will find a way just to see his reaction LOL

I believe there is an unwritten rule that we never actually use mum and dad to refer to ourselves. In our house it’s usually ‘ask your father? Where’s mum? Dad knows where your football boots are’ etc. It would be strange if DH called me by my name for the kids, like, ask Susan if you have karate tonight or Susan will collect after school. That’s just weird 🥴

Take to to mummy, to a kid is fair enough, but slap this nonsense down now

@Pop12 YANBU I'd have told him straight the first time he did it that its not attractive

Ick. Ick. Ick.
Also my identity didn’t get erased and replaced when I became a mum. You are still you. Your name is still your name.
No way would I put up with that babyish creepy behaviour. Yuk.

Oh that would give me the ick

does he do it during sex?

🤮

Mummy isn't your name though, and you're not his mummy, which is what I'd be pointing out to him!

Also your dc at some point will probably start calling you 'mum' - is he still going to call you mummy then?

Do you have your own identity to him or do you only exist as the 'mummy' of his children?!

Whoops. Now I feel icky because DH and I are often mum and dad to each other whenever the kids are near and they're teens! It's been so long it's just habit.

Serious ick 😶‍🌫️

It wouldn’t bother me. If anyone finds it creepy, it’s possible they are the creep. It’s just using the same name your kids know you by in front of them, unless he’s doing it when they aren’t around?

My aunt and uncle call each other mummy and daddy. The kids are in their 20s and have moved out. They just call each other mummy and daddy instead of their names. Fucking weird. We don't speak to them

mmmmm, when you write it down in the way you have - it does seem really creepy and I was like, 'ooooh no' that's awful - but then I realised that my DH and I do that all the time.

I never call DH 'Daddy' on behalf of myself, but I do it when it's on behalf of my kid, example

DC - "I wanna play football - where's the ball"
Me - "Daddy, where's the football?"
or
DC - "I wanna wear my 'insert football team' socks
ME - "Daddy's where are the football team socks?

And I think the reason I do it - is to indicate that the request is for the child - not me.

What I would never do is:
ME: Daddy where are my socks? - cos that's creepy as hell.

BUT - in saying this - we have very very young DC. Nowhere near the age of 8yrs old - so I guess it will naturally tail off.

I don't deliberately do it - I don't think I've ever thought about it. DH does the same back to me - but if he said "Mummy what snack can we have' - I'd know that he only meant for the DC. He wouldn't mean that in relation to himself.

It's like a weird way of saying - I'm not asking for me, I'm asking for DC - what do want them to have for lunch etc. Unless DH is actually wondering whether he should have some puree pears or packet of raisins for a snack 😂

Not sure that makes sense. I'm really going to contemplate now whether we're both right old weirdos 😂

Except my name isn't mum. And my kids know my name isn't mum.

So there's literally no need for dh to call me mum

@Bluekerfuffle

To say 'ask mummy' to a child under, say, 8 is OK.
To call your OH mum, mummy, mother when kids are not even in the room is just wrong, Imo.
As a pp suggests above, nobody on this thread has suggested that DC call you by your given name, as in 'Sue, can I have my bottle now please'.

Your young child: YABVU.
Your husband: creepy, YANBU.

So many 'mummy' threads this evening

Sometimes if I’m holding our baby I say ‘daddy what are you doing?’ Or ‘daddy would you like a coffee?’ But I sort of do it in a silly way like it’s the baby saying it 🤣🙈

when the baby is not in my arms I do not call dp daddy, yikes