What's the most wildly inappropriate thing to ever happen to you?

[badassbaby]

I'll start...
When I was 19 I was working as a waitress in a holiday hotel.
I was having a wild, incredibly exciting relationship with the hotel manager, who was a good 15 years older than me.
Guests would fill out feedback forms on the hotel.
One day my boss (Restaurant manager) called me into his office. He showed me a feedback form that stated the guests weren't able to get a proper nights sleep, due to incredibly load love making all night long from the room above them.
The restaurant manager then pointed out that the room in question was the hotel managers room (his boss)
I can't remember what I responded, but when I think about it now, what the hell was he thinking of?!? And why question me about it and not the hotel manager?
I had the arrogance of youth so of course carried on exactly as before 😂
So what's yours?

Jeez…I’ve shared my stories on this thread but reading all the others just makes me realise none of it was “my fault”. I’m so sorry so many have experienced such horrible acts but this thread is actually like therapy. It’s not us, ladies, it’s THEM!

From the age of 15 I was having sex with a teacher during detention and some Saturdays. I honestly thought I was in love with him and he with me and that when I left school we would be a proper boyfriend and girlfriend. I let him do some really awful things to me and just assumed it was what people in adult relationships did.
When I left school we carried on for a bit but he only ever wanted to have sex at his house, never wanted to go out on dates or do couple things and broke my heart. Only looking back now, years later, I realise I was groomed for disgusting sex.

When I was about 17 my friends & I were travelling back from a concert in London to outskirts. There had been heavy snow/flooding & trains weren't running. We got a bus part of the way then had to walk along the north circular. A cab driver pulled up & asked if we wanted a lift. We said thanks but we couldn't afford a cab. He said not to worry as he was going back to his depot in our area. So we got in. After about 10 minutes or so he pulled up & offered to take us all to our doors if we all did him a 'favour'. I hadn't a clue what he meant but my friend said we were all 15 so underage. He said not to worry, he wouldn't tell anyone. We all got out & walked the rest of the way home. It took us about 2 hours. I got in big trouble for being so late home. I felt too embarrassed to tell my parents what had happened.

When I was 13 my best friend moved further away. I'd visit her every other Saturday. Her dad used to drive me home. He asked me if I wanted to learn how to drive and of course I said yes. But I had to sit on his lap. So you can imagine what happened. I never told anyone . Really horrible.

When I was about 8 my older brother (15) asked if I knew what sex was. I told him I didn't. He said he would show me. He usually ignored me & refused to talk to me so I felt really happy that he was taking notice of me. When my parents went to visit friends one evening he told me to get undressed & he would show me.
Needless to say he didn't speak to me again for years. He said if I told anyone I would get into big trouble.
I never told my parents. They're both gone now. We communicate now but have never spoken about it. We both have grown up children now.

Aged 15 me in first job. Finished Sunday evening at 8pm walk to bus stop 20 mins then 40 min wait for the bus, the stop was unlit and back off the road. As I crossed the road to get to the stop saw a man in a car with interior light on watch me as I crossed. 2 mins later he drove round the corner and past me at about walking pace. I held my breath till he passed, scarily he went to the roundabout at the end of the road and came back. He drove to my side of the road and called me over, he told me I’d just missed my bus ( I knew he was lying as there was only one every 2 hours on Sunday evening) get in I’ll give you a lift I’m going your way ( he had no clue where I was going) I don’t know what made me say it but I said oh no the next bus is soon. My mum is the driver she will be worried and call the police if I don’t get on. He drove off but I shudder to think what could have happened.

😢 I’m sorry

I was shaking a tin outside a shop for my local women’s support services/refuge flag day. Honestly the amount of inappropriate comments. You don’t look like a battered wife etc. One man kerb crawled me after he left the shop and beckoned me over to his car! I just ignored him so he wrote his number on a piece of paper and brought it over to me. It was honestly bizarre!

Having a mammogram and then a physical breast exam, quite scared for results. Anxious. After the chaperone left the room post physical exam the consultant said, “you need to loose some weight and then all the men will look at you”.
I didn’t even react properly - I mumbled something about being married and not wanting men to look at me and tried not to cry. Felt so violated.

Oh, also got stopped whilst with my friend on a Saturday eve in London by a big car, we were both 14, and looked 14, it was Gary Glitter who rolled down the window and asked if we wanted to go to a party. We were flattered and giggly but had the sense not to get into his car.

Sickening how much underage sex with much older men has been condoned and actively encouraged by the child’s relatives, including mothers and older sisters.

In my late teens, I worked in an office. It was a bit fuddy-duddy, and because I liked to wear fitted jackets, short skirts & heels, I think I stood out a bit.
Actually, I started to attract the unwanted attention of the creepy office caretaker, who was in his late 40s. He left little love letters and poems on my desk, found out my home number and surprised me with strange phonecalls, grabbed my waist in corridors and basically would not leave me alone.
Being very naive, I had no idea what to do. Two of the worst things he did was turn up at my house and try and befriend my parents, and a couple of times he ran up behind me when I was coming out of the work cafeteria, pick me up and put me over his shoulder. It was horrible.
Luckily, one of the women at work reported him and he was warned to leave me alone. I left shortly afterwards, but for some time afterwards, I'm sure he was making silent phonecalls at home.
Really, really creepy.

Early 70s, a couple of my schoolfriends aged 13 had boyfriends of about 17/18. They would book a guesthouse and stay overnight . I assume they told their mums they slept at each others houses. Lots of girls had much older boyfriends and we never thought anything was wrong with it.
I remember being on a bus one night and sitting a couple of seats away from me was a girl who looked around 17/18 but who I knew to be 12. She was sat holding hands with a guy who looked at least in his early 20s and I always wondered if he actually knew her real age. Lots of us used to get dollied up and go to pubs. No ID required back then and nobody really asked. The occasions any of us were asked , we all had a well practiced date of birth that we could reel off convincingly.
Quite a few schoolgirl pregnancies back then and any found to be pregnant would be kicked out of school.
How times have changed but in some respects I don't think they have changed very much ifyswim!!

But what made him behave like this? Influence of father, elder brothers? It's just appalling.

I have never shared all of this.

14 my boyfriend 20 and I had planned I would loose my virginity to him at a party. He did not show. I was laughingly told he was with hos pregnant girlfriend I slept with a 18 year old who then compared my breasts to porn stars in magazines - unfavourably. My friends fell out with me for being a slave.

2 weeks later, I have no idea what may or may not have happened. I drank too much, was called a slay.

15 went to a male friends house. Our best friends were dating. Went to bed, woke up we were having sex. He wouldn't date me, I was a slag. We had a dysfunctional on off one bight stand relationship for years.

19 my boyfriend was laughing about sleeping with others in front of my.

24 went speed dating was drug raped. Had a dysfunctional abusive relationship for 6 months.

My self esteem was so crap, I have np idea how many men ai have slept with. Npr how many times it was non consensual after the first few times alcohol and drugs made it easier.

Over many years working in pubs, nightclubs, offices, shops, library's, restaurants, call centres and was abused, harassed, assaulted. Then I worked in prisons I was abused less by the prisoners than the male staff.

And don't even get me started on driving instructors

46 now, 8 years married to the most wonderful man. Who does not know all of my history and has respected what I cannot talk of.

I am average, nothing special but what did me was being brought up to be a people pleaser. My girls who are in primary school understand consent and that they are in charge of their bodies.

You and me both. Your story sounds so familiar to my story.
He was old enough to be my dad!!! And my boss, married with children.

It was only after a drunken convo with a friend of a friend who is a child welfare officer that they told me I'd been groomed.

This was around 25 years ago. I was 15yrs old and lived very rurally so used to have about a 15 minute walk up a fairly steep narrow country lane from a bus stop. Once I was walking home just about to go up the hill, and it was raining and a car stopped next to me. The driver was a man and said he’d seen me walking and wanted to offer me a lift home as the weather was so bad. I remember thinking, oh god there’s no one around do I get in the car with him and hope for the best or is he going to try and drag me in the car if I say no. I did get in the car 😱, panicked for the 3 min drive up the country lane hill that he was going to lock the door. I told him a house several doors away from mine was mine, and he could drop me here, (as I said rural country lane so not many houses about). As I got out the car, he did say ‘probably best not to tell your parents about this! I was very lucky and stupid but still to this day, if he’s had wanted to do anything untoward there was no where I could run! It never happened again so he could have just been a kind driver but it’s easy to think the worst!

I’m so sorry @wellstopdoingitthen. would you ever feel brave enough to report him?

I got drunk in school once, I was in year 9, possibly year 10. I look back on it and cringe because I don’t know 1. why my mum used to buy me 2lt bottles of cider to take to my friends after school and 2. how the hell I got away with it!

I sat and drank the entire bottle IN THE CLASSROOM and then went to my afternoon classes absolutely leathered. I went to a very strict Grammar school too and how no-one ever found out, I’ll never know.

I left school in the mid 80s and it was a very different time! My first boss (I was on the YTS) duct taped me to my chair (can't imagine a man in his late 30s doing this to a 17 year old girl in the office these days). I also worked somewhere where you had to be careful not to be followed into the stationery cupboard by one of the managers, because you'd be groped! One of the managers in particular was very hands on and I remember him chasing another female member of staff into the ladies. They didn't come out for some time. Grim

I was walking home from school at 13 when a man masturbated in front of me.

I was 14 and on my paper round when a man very insistently tried to give me a lift because it was raining.

I was 23 and newly married when an older man I was working with - in a group - for a single day in a professional capacity said that if I ever wanted an extra marital affair he was my man. Totally out of the blue, just said casually as I said goodbye to all the other professionals.

I was 25 when a senior colleague came up to my desk and kissed the nape of my neck to praise me for something I was doing on screen.

it makes 55-year-old me’s blood boil.

At 14 I caught the bus into the local town. I remember a man (about 30/40) getting on the bus and instantly getting weird vibes from him. He sat at the front and once we’d arrived I toddled off into town and thought no more of it. Then, while I was leafing through books in WHSmiths, he came up to me and asked if I’d like to go for a coffee? I stammered something about meeting a boyfriend as I put my book down and when I looked up he’d vanished!

At 21 I caught a train to a job interview. Got into a totally empty carriage and was followed on by a 50/60 year old who sat RIGHT NEXT to me, pressing his leg onto mine the whole way.

Went to baby cinema and had a man sat behind me (who I’d assumed was a dad, but no wife or baby materialised once the film had started) who leaned forwards once I started breastfeeding my son and just ogled me until another woman came to join me (total stranger who’d seen him and came to save the day). I wanted to report him but buckled when I saw that he waved goodbye to the staff and they adoringly saw him off— he was obviously a beloved regular at BABY cinema. I still kick myself for keeping quiet over this one, it makes me feel sick.

My English teacher (mid 30s) was always so lovely and knew I had a tough home life and had always been more like a very close friend. Invited me out for coffees once I hit sixth form (he’d taught me since I was 14) and it wasn’t until I left and heard he’d been sleeping with someone two years below while she was at school did I realise I was probably being groomed but was too naive to notice it— I’d always been busy with boyfriends/chasing boys at school and was totally oblivious. My now DHs mum taught with him years later and pointed out that she’d been really shocked by how much he knew about me personally (& vice versa: like his parents names/jobs/ where they lived— village over from me! A lot for a teacher!) and it was only then that it dawned on me.

Loads more but these are ones I’ve always kicked myself over not going ballistic over, but at the time I was just frightened or too young to recognise what was happening.

I’m so sorry to read all these but it’s woken me up to how ludicrously widespread this is and how I’m going to hammer home to my kids that they should always assert themselves and I’m always a phone call away.

This thread reminds me of when I got thrush at 16 and went to our family doctor. It was the first time I'd gone without my parents and he asked where they were and why my mum hadn't come with me. I said she was working but truth is I hadn't told her as I naively feared she'd think I'd had sex even though I was a virgin.
He looked me over and gave me a prescription. As I left, he said "never trust a man, even a doctor like me"
I remember thinking, how odd to say such a thing.
Unfortunately those words have rung true all through my life, 30 years on.
From personal experience, friends and on forums as this.
Sad how women are viewed as sex things and how a lot of men won't think twice about sex with a minor if they knew they could get away with it.

I went to boarding school and the married much older headmaster abused his position with the students. One was pregnant during exam time and got excluded.
Back then you either dropped out or were expelled.
He was a respected man with good social standing and died as such as no one spoke up.
I brought it up on a school Facebook page once and got promtly blocked.

When I was about 15 I was at a local market. I wanted to buy something from a stall manned by a 20 something bloke. He said I could have it for free if I flashed my boobies (I was pretty well endowed!). Course I did it, flashed, grabbed and ran!! 😂