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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Skidding Car - friend's husband today "couldn't resist the opportunity"

544 replies

alwaysmovingforwards · 05/11/2022 19:02

Sorry, bit of a long one..

I flew back to the UK today and my friend's husband had kindly agreed to give me a lift home from the airport. Such a lovely gesture - saves me either a hefty taxi bill or 2+hrs on public transport. My friend lives close to me and her husband owns companies on the industrial estates near the airport , so he's always doing that route. I get on really well with both of them and their family, they're all lovely people, seem very happy and lead a very nice lifestyle. It was my friend who made the offer and we arranged a couple of weeks ago, he then followed up on text to say it's no problem just let him flight details etc which I did.

Anyway, we arranged for me to get the airport bus 10mins to the long stay carpark to avoid the airport fees, which makes sense. So I get there and he arrives shortly after. It's a massive carpark and pretty much empty so he pulls up right next to the little shelter thing, we say hi, he gives me a hand putting my bag in the boot and I get in and buckle up. As we pull away I'm saying thank you and was about to ask how everyone is, but he's smiling and says "sorry, just can't resist the opportunity..."

He then accelerates his car really quickly, turns and the whole car starts skidding sideways! The engine sounds incredibly loud and must be revving right up to full power and we're literally sliding on the wet carpark in a big circle, totally terrifying. I don't know if he was in control because the steering wheel was moving around quickly but didn't seem to correlate with the direction of the car. It's one of the most shocking things I've ever experienced and I don't like roller coasters etc.

He then slows, chuckles "just couldn't resist it" again and calmly drives to the barriers, exits smoothly towards the motorway, puts the radio on and then casually starts asking how my trip was.. as if that whole thing didn't happen! I tried to speak on the way home, to be polite and make small talk, but in all honesty I was feeling very ill and my legs were shaky 40mins later when he dropped me off.

Should I tell my friend what an abolosute idiot her husband actually is? On one had I really appreciate the gesture of giving me a lift and value our friendship, but on the other this was an incredibly dangerous and shocking incident she should be aware of.

It's so weird, because up until now I thought he was a really nice guy. But I just can't see him in the same way any more. I know he likes fast cars because she's told me that the stables at their house have been converted into garages and he has various cars in there. I've been in the car with him before and he's been a really good confident driver, very safe and smooth. He's in his early 50s FFS!

To make matters worse, I called my parents when home to say hi after my trip. I spoke to my Dad as even though he's in his 70s, he knows lots about cars and I explained what happened and he sort of laughed and said "well, once every now and again, why not eh..."
Seriously WTF?!?

So AIBU to be so shocked and upset by this? I still feel nauseous now.

Or is there a weird parallel universe I've just discovered where respectable, responsible, grown arse men with kids and wives and businesses, that should know better, see it as perfectly acceptable to be doing skidding and sliding and loud engine revving in their cars?

OP posts:
oopsfellover · 06/11/2022 07:32

Whilst a harmless and probably quite fun manoeuvre, this is an odd thing to do with a passenger and without checking whether they’d mind.

Museya15 · 06/11/2022 07:55

This has got to be the best one on Mumsnet yet!

Hiddenvoice · 06/11/2022 07:59

I think still shaking 40 mins later is a little bit extreme.
I understand he caught you off guard but he probably thought you knew what he was about to do as he mentioned he couldn’t help it.
Up to you if you mention it to his wife but she will either laugh it off or you’ll just start an argument when he was doing you a favour.
Yes he should have asked if it was okay but it was spur of the moment, not as if he planned it. Even your dad laughed you off with this. Just because he’s had a little fun doesn’t make him a bad guy or irresponsible.

SkylightSkylight · 06/11/2022 07:59

pewtypie · 05/11/2022 19:50

Just don’t get in a car with him again.

I know he likes fast cars because she's told me that the stables at their house have been converted into garages and he has various cars in there.

They have a very nice lifestyle with stable garages full of cars but they didn’t want to pay £5 for airport pick up and instead had you take a bus to a deserted car park? Bizarre.

Only bizarre if you don't know the airport.

WishfulWanda · 06/11/2022 07:59

I think you’re going to have to let this one go. You need to decide what’s more important, your friendship or making this dramatic revelation about his poor driving which your friend is probably already aware of.

PS- From your post title, I thought he’d made a pass at you.

Pipsquiggle · 06/11/2022 08:03

He was a prat for doing a doughnut without warning you, however, for that type of manoeuvre it probably the safest and perfect of settings to do one.

I wouldn't 'tell' on him.

wibblewobbleboard · 06/11/2022 08:07

He did a donut in an empty car park? Is that it?

Doingmybest12 · 06/11/2022 08:15

Surprised by all the people who are familiar with and not scared by a manoeuvre like this. I would've been horrified by this happening. What an immature show off. I think I would drop it in the conversation with your friend and would arrange another way to get back next time.

Sally090807 · 06/11/2022 08:17

You say he’s a “colossal wanker”, the person who saved you a “either a hefty taxi bill or 2 hours on public transport”
Yes he was a little childish to do what he did but you have so over reacted. You’re no friend of his talking about him like that. He clearly drove you home safely or you’d be moaning about that too!

wibblewobbleboard · 06/11/2022 08:20

I did similar years ago. Empty car park. I did a handbrake turn nicely into a parking space.

Haven't played like that with cars for years. I'm sensible now.

Sally090807 · 06/11/2022 08:20

FlissyPaps · 06/11/2022 00:05

Imagine if the guy did it with KIDS in the car. I bet half of these responses would be different.

But he didn’t though so a pointless comment!

Chilpa · 06/11/2022 08:21

Surprised by all the people who are familiar with
Its far more surprising someone having never heard of it tbf, even if you've never seen it in real life, it's something most people will have seen in a movie or TV show.

Ginglymostomatidae · 06/11/2022 08:25

Smirking at the people on here, who would make sure their friend knew 'they wouldn't be accepting any more lifts from the husband'.

What makes you think you'd be offered any more lifts?!

Sometimes people on mumsnet are so uptight, their arses must squeak as they walk.

Doingmybest12 · 06/11/2022 08:25

I meant familiar as in have experienced this themselves as a passenger or driver and how many would be ok with this happening with no warning , of course I know what it is .

Sally090807 · 06/11/2022 08:28

He did a donut, not multiple ones, if this is the most shocking thing you’ve ever experienced in your life then you’ve had a very sheltered life. 🙄

Stephy1886 · 06/11/2022 08:31

The guy just thinks he’s vin diesel living his life a quarter pounder at a time 😂

Notacompetitiveundereater · 06/11/2022 08:35

Some of these responses are just odd. Driving for decades and never heard of a hand brake turn /donut. Never seen it on the tv. Never even watched rhe movie grease where they do it, never seen top gear, never watched any of the many many movies and tv shows where one is done, apparently just totally stunned and horrified by this completely alien concept.

and the whole “id think less and tell his wife” like a child telling teacher. Honestly you’d think less of someone for doing a handbrake turn in an empty car park, how utterly cringe.

im sure he told his wife in passing, she’s likely either done them herself or been with him when he has.

the Op has not come back. I’m still guessing she can’t drive. Maybe a nervous passenger. He clearly didn’t know she’d react so badly, as most people wouldn’t as witnessed by this thread, but a minority would.

FirewomanSam · 06/11/2022 08:37

Well I have learned a lot from this thread! I genuinely thought the only people who did donuts in empty car parks were boy racer idiot twats but apparently it’s something ‘everyone’ does and if you don’t like it then you’re lame and uptight. I can honestly say it’s never occurred to me to do it or even want to do it. I’m so surprised at the majority of the responses!

ItsAllABit · 06/11/2022 08:39

This really made me laugh for some reason, I’m just picturing the look of horror and confusion on the face I’ve invented for you 😂

pictish · 06/11/2022 08:52

Me too. I’m afraid I chuckled when I read the OP…so sorry it gave you such a fright. You’ve not been in a car with someone doing this before. You weren’t to know. Lol…wee shame. X

Sally090807 · 06/11/2022 09:00

I’m beginning to think this is yet another made up thread.

wibblewobbleboard · 06/11/2022 09:08

This thread makes me want to start racing and drifting again.

Hibernationsetting · 06/11/2022 09:10

Bet you’re fun on a Friday night, OP.

mansviewpoint · 06/11/2022 09:14

Used to work alongside stuntmen/women and the funny thing is, they would absolutly be appalled by this behavour, not because the drivermight not be incontrol, because ther ewas no warning that this was going to happen. The guy is immature sure for doing it but damn right uncaring that he didn't give you the option saying "Do you mind"

DarkKarmaIlama · 06/11/2022 09:16

@mansviewpoint

Agree. All these women saying he sounds fun etc and fawning over him. Sad. He sounds like a twat to the highest order. He should have warned the OP.