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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Anyone else in their 30s and worried?

265 replies

NairobiGal · 04/11/2022 17:00

Of course this might apply to other age groups but I can only speak for myself. I'm in my 30s. Saved and saved to get a mortgage which years ago would have been possible on my wage. Now, once I've saved enough to get a 5% mortgage, it's not possible and my savings are rapidly declining because my wage no no longer covers everything. I'm lucky to be in a position where I have a bit saved, as some of my friends have nothing and are getting further and further into debt. I'm worried that by the time we are out of this mess, if we are ever out of it, my savings will be next to gone, I'll be back to square one, and will be nearly 50 by the time I can save enough to get a mortgage. I know owning a house isn't the be all and end all, but I'm so disheartened that I spent all those years saving and it's now going on rent, groceries, fuel. Etc. Maybe I'm just feeling sorry for myself but I'm just fed up. For instance when my parents were on a similar equivalent to my wage when I was younger, they could afford a holiday every year. I've never taken my son on holiday and he's 4. I'm not entitled to a holiday but things have changed so much. I thought things were meant to get better for each generation. Not worse. I'm really struggling.

OP posts:
Heyahun · 04/11/2022 17:03

Honestly I think unless you’ve bought a house before you have a kid it’s impossible these days :(

DorritLittle · 04/11/2022 17:05

I really sympathise, it's shit. Do you claim everything you are entitled to for universal credit? Can you put some of the savings in a savings account you can't get at? I read today that interest rates are projected to come down again by 2025.

Legallypinkish · 04/11/2022 17:07

No it’s crap for the younger generation now. We’re early 50’s, bought a house at 20 with a small mortgage because we’d saved a fair bit. Mortgage paid off by the time we were 38 when we’d saved again. I feel so sorry for the younger generations.

Crucible · 04/11/2022 17:09

It's shit, you're not wrong. Things should be better. Good luck and I hope things improve for you.

LittleBeluga · 04/11/2022 17:11

I'm 32 and everything does feel a bit unfair. I became a mum the week before the first covid lockdown, and it seems like the world has gone to absolute shit since that point. I feel so worried for my DC and their future.

CherylCrows · 04/11/2022 17:11

To be fair I’m not all that worried, but then again I’m 31 and have owned our home for a few years now. Rates going up a bit daunting but our earnings have shot up since moving in so can ride out big increases in mortgage payments (our fixed term is up in June next year Confused)

This is why it’s better to buy before having children though.

JamSandle · 04/11/2022 17:15

I'm not really worried as it is what it is. But I was brought up by parents who saw life get better and better and had high hopes me. Realising I cant live up to those expectations does make me feel low a lot. I'm working through it.

carefulcalculator · 04/11/2022 17:19

You are right, it is shit.

If working in an average job doesn't enable you to do average things like start a family and pay for housing, something is going seriously wrong.

ipreferthecat · 04/11/2022 17:20

@CherylCrows

You sound incredibly smug to be honest

JamSandle · 04/11/2022 17:21

It's also challenging when as you say you've done everything 'right.'

Studied hard, uni, work, savings but it doesn't go very far.

blebbleb · 04/11/2022 17:21

It's crap for people wanting to get on the housing ladder. We only bought our place less than 4 years ago but I don't feel we'd have be able to get the same (5% deposit) mortgage now. Rents are also going up by crazy amounts!

Beseen22 · 04/11/2022 17:25

We are due to remortgage next year and I'm going to have to increase my hours purely to cover the interest. And our standard of living looks like its going to be pretty basic for thr next three or so years to be able to pay our mortgage.

movintothecountry · 04/11/2022 17:41

Have you got a lifetime isa? Perhaps start saving into one of those if not already? The govt top it up by 25% for everything you put in, up to 4k a year I think and once in you can't get it back out until you buy a house so a good way to save and it keep pace with inflation?
Sorry I know it won't solve your problem, but it might help a bit?
If you don't end up using it for property it can become retirement savings and you can get it out after 60, so might help as a cushion in old age if you don't end up getting on the property ladder.

AloysiusBear · 04/11/2022 17:45

I am 37. Not too worried for ourselves. We bought before having kids, and have lived v modestly relative to our earnings, so when our mortgage fix ends in 3 years, there will be under 150k left.
I am worried for friends and relatives who borrowed to the max and have a lot of things on finance (expensive cars especially) which will get much more expensive with higher rates.

Whynobreadpudding · 04/11/2022 17:47

Liz has a lot to answer for. Thank god she’s gone, but what a bloody mess.

CherylCrows · 04/11/2022 17:48

ipreferthecat · 04/11/2022 17:20

@CherylCrows

You sound incredibly smug to be honest

And you sound petulant

LoveMyCats1 · 04/11/2022 17:54

ipreferthecat · 04/11/2022 17:20

@CherylCrows

You sound incredibly smug to be honest

They are smug, but correct.

40andfit · 04/11/2022 17:56

I agree with @CherylCrows. If we had had children first we would have never managed to get onto the mortgage ladder. Children are just so expensive and there are so many extras that you feel you need to buy. I look back to how frugal DH and I were for the year before we bought our house together and I just think that would have been incredibly difficult before children.

Eastangular2000 · 04/11/2022 17:59

40andfit · 04/11/2022 17:56

I agree with @CherylCrows. If we had had children first we would have never managed to get onto the mortgage ladder. Children are just so expensive and there are so many extras that you feel you need to buy. I look back to how frugal DH and I were for the year before we bought our house together and I just think that would have been incredibly difficult before children.

This! It’s so bloody obvious. Children cost a fortune, childcare, lost earnings etc.

Mushroo · 04/11/2022 18:00

Yeh it’s crap. We’ve done everything ‘right’, got graduate jobs, bought a flat, massively overpaid the mortgage and we’re just about to start TTC and it’s all just gone tits up.

The family houses we were hoping to move too look increasingly unaffordable even though we have loads of equity in the flat (which might well disappear) it’s throw in childcare and I just don’t see how it will work. We’re fairly high earners as well so I really feel for everyone renting.

Iflyaway · 04/11/2022 18:03

This is why it’s better to buy before having children though.

Words fail me...

blebbleb · 04/11/2022 18:04

This is why it’s better to buy before having children though

Captain hindsight strikes!

HangOnToYourself · 04/11/2022 18:07

CherylCrows · 04/11/2022 17:11

To be fair I’m not all that worried, but then again I’m 31 and have owned our home for a few years now. Rates going up a bit daunting but our earnings have shot up since moving in so can ride out big increases in mortgage payments (our fixed term is up in June next year Confused)

This is why it’s better to buy before having children though.

I found it very easy to buy a house as a single parent actually, but then I am extremely clever and well paid. And sexy.

YellowTreeHouse · 04/11/2022 18:08

This is why you should always prioritise buying a house before having kids, because if you don’t, you’re never going to own a house.

Eastangular2000 · 04/11/2022 18:09

blebbleb · 04/11/2022 18:04

This is why it’s better to buy before having children though

Captain hindsight strikes!

It’s not hindsight though. It’s absolutely obvious to anyone who gives it even a nanosecond of thought

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