to be obsessing over comment in DH's work leaving card?

[feelingatadobsessive]

I don't really know where to put this because I know I am probably being very unreasonable but here goes...

I read DH's leaving card from his old job and there was a comment from a girl along the lines of "there's no way you'll forget me, just think of rug-munching" or something like that. Do you think this is inappropriate to write in a married man's card or am I being silly? I am now a tad obsessed with finding out what she looks like.

Probably an office 'witticism' that meant more to her than to your dh which is why she wrote it and he can't recall it. Or just so unfunny in the retelling he can't be bothered - some work jokes are just a bit like that - funny in context but not at all funny if you try and explain them.

Would not worry at all.
it is obviously an in office joke which you are not party to as you don't work there.It was written on a card to be read by lots of others.

I think it would be most unreasonable to think badly of her on the strength of this alone.

what does your husband do?

in my industry no one would write something like that... on a leaving card! so crude!

Whoa! I didn't expect so many people to respond to this! I don't think he had an affair with her or anything (and to everyone who said I am being obsessive...I know Hence the name!) I am just annoyed, intrigued and probably being extremely silly. Actually, no probably about it, I know I am being silly. To those who said they understood where I was coming from...thanks, it helps. Now please stop me going on to facebook and searching her out...

LOL@going on facebook.
That's the sort of thing I'd probably do too

sounds like a cliquey work related joke, dont get yer drawers in a twist about it. you risk coming across as psycho-dont-look-at-my-man-or-i-will-kill-ya-missus if you pursue this.

If my dh shared a silly joke with someone else and he was unable to share it with me, I would divorce him.

Irreconcilable differences in humour would be the death knell of the marriage.

lol chocolatedot

dont facebook or whatever OP
let it lie

OK so I did go searching her out (I knew I would! The one thing I can't resist is temptation!) She is very young and very pretty. Well, quite pretty. I don't have my knickers in a twist about it anymore... don't know why it helped to see her pictures but it did. I think the real problem is that since I had the baby I feel like I have aged 10 years. My body didn't react well to the pregnancy and I was very ill. It's now 8 months on and my body is nowhere near what it was before. I used to be sexy, good body, brazillianed up...OK too much info! But now I am so insecure. It feels weird that my body has changed so much but DH hasn't changed at all. He is a sexy man and girls flirt with him. That never used to bother me because I knew he had it better at home but now... well, I am bothered! I can't compete anymore. I feel like a floppuy, chubby old woman. Well, who knew this was going to turn into a spluging confessional, bare your soul post? Sorry.
x

Erm... I feel like I've stumbled into a twilight zone...
Why would she have written anything to wind up someone she's never met?
Why is it so completely out of order for a woman to write something saucy in the card of a married man, so much so that there's all these faces around and even someone advocating assault!

If something had happened then I doubt she'd have written anything in his leaving card ffs, AND I doubt he'd take it home to show you either.

Before you head round to slap her consider this scene: there she is sitting there, racking her head for a witty/funny thing to put in the card as it makes its way round the office? And decides to say something about when Jerry frm the post room made a rude crack about the graze she got on her knee. Jerry leaves and she and your dh have a joke that means nothing to your dh, but made her feel less upset by Jerry's lewd, sexist comment.

Or maybe she did trip over and make the joke herself

The point is there's many more possible reasons behind her comment than the long shot that she's either having an affair with your dh, or (not so) secretly wanting one.

If you are seriously upset about this you need to have a real think about your relationship as a whole and what about it is not up to scratch, as fury over this can only be understood as being a straw breaking the proverbial camels back.

Not that I think you are a camel, in any way

Man, I have to either be quicker at responding or stop making them so long cause this thread is waaay further on than when I started writing!

erm...dingdong, I feel like I've stumbled into the twilight zone! I think your post was unnecessarily harsh. I already said I don't think he's having an affair and (even if he was having an affair) I would never go round and slap anyone! I don't think she wrote it to wind me up. I am sure I was never intended to see it. In fact, I doubt she even considered me for a moment when she wrote it. DH did not show it to me. I found it. I think I explained my reasons for feeling so unreasonably (and yes, I stated in my original post that I was being unreasonable) upset about this in my last post...35 minutes before yours!

Oh dear, twas me who suggested the slap...

I've thought about this since (not the slap, the comment in the card ) and you know what it probably is? She probably once referred to lesbianism as 'rug munching' and DH thought it was really funny, so she wrote it in his card. But like texting, it can so easily be mis-interpreted.

I know feelingatadobsessive, I started writing before you responded (I did say it took a while!). It was someone else who said they'd go and slap her (its the naughty corner for you penguinsmummy!), and it was other peoples reactions that stunned me.
Yes, harsh, but not all directed at you- sorry!
I was right in thinking there were other things at the root of it... ;) Like you said, you had a hard pregnancy, which wasn't so long ago really, your lo was in you longer than he's been out after all! And that is bound to knock your confidence, but you don't need to compete cause you already won your prize!
And you can always go brazillian again, if you really must...
btw I was going to shorten your name a bit but decided not to when I realised I'd typed "fatobsessive"