To think not everything is ‘misogyny’

[Cuppasoupmonster]

… and that the word is massively overused on here?

I’m getting quite tired of it if I’m honest, it feels like every other conversation the ‘misogyny’ card is whipped out and anyone who disagrees has ‘internalised misogyny’ (um no I just have a different opinion).

It’s becoming the ‘BeKind’ of feminism. Overused to the point it’s getting meaningless and irritating, and just used to ‘win’ any kind of nuanced topic without any proper discussion.

AIBU? 🤷🏼‍♀️

I think you’ll find I did

Do please quote yourself because I missed it too.

You were asked for specific examples here ^^ @Millsbills .

I missed it then, could you please tell us?

I can't see it either?

@Millsbills

Well when some women on here have a proven inability to understand it’s not rambling is it?

Probably should have said 'some women' originally then.

You didn't, you said the following:

Women have demonstrated an inability to understand.

NAWALT after all, eh?

Oppression that is directed at women
Great, so let's go back to the definition of misogyny:

misogyny
mɪˈsɒdʒ(ə)ni
noun
dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women.

Women correctly identifying ingrained prejudice against women is misogyny.

Or are you now going to quibble that ingrained prejudice isn't actually oppressive and the silly women who say it's oppressive don't know what they're talking about.

that the word is massively overused on here

YADNBU

I agree with you op.
Another ridiculous notion is that men hate women, that one always makes me laugh.
Particularly when it's said by women who are in a relationship with them. If you really think that men hate women, then what are you doing with one? Which of course will be answered with ' except my man of course ' 😂

Then label acts of sexism as misogyny incorrectly

Sexism doesn't exist in a vacuum. It occurs because of misogyny. Labelling all of it as misogyny is accurate.

Even if it was the case that women were using abortion as contraception, why does that matter? What’s the issue?

This! And their ‘lovely, strapping’ sons of course.

Then you get the ‘gender disappointment’ threads where a woman (who has probably read some of the millions of threads about how awful men are) is apprehensive about having a boy, and posters are all ‘Boys are lovely and so affectionate, why would you want a girl?’

I mean don’t they see the link?

I was going to post a simalar sentiment to the OP in some other thread recently, before chickening out.

A few decades ago, when I first came across the word, I understood it to mean generalised hatred or contempt for women. Almost nothing that is called mysogny on here definitely falls into that category. Some things may have it as a plausible explanation for a wrong, but usually there are more specific potential motivations that would make more sense to me. (To be fair, I can't get my head around the idea of hating a whole sex, so some other explanation will always seem more plausible, to me.)

The new meaning seems to make it a metaphysical force that is responsible for anything bad that happens to any woman, ever. Under my definition, even the most serious wrongs, rape and murder, are hardly ever likely to be primarily driven by misogyny.

I've never personally encountered a definitely misogynistic person in my life, so far as I can remember. Reading this forum has been the only time I've encountered people saying things that unambiguously conveyed a general hatred of or contempt for the opposite sex, but it's been women hating men, not the other way around.

Condoms aren’t free and highly effective?

Under my definition, even the most serious wrongs, rape and murder, are hardly ever likely to be primarily driven by misogyny.

What are they driven by?

Vasectomies are.

So are condoms. Which was my point.

ForwardRolls

Because it's entirely possible that women are capable of identifying and discussing issues of class based oppression, whilst being in a relationship with someone from the male sex class because believe it or not women are capable of discussing structural oppression whilst living their own lives.

Ingrained prejudice against women is woven throughout our society.
There are problems with toxic masculinity too, interestingly often linked to misogynistic views of women
e.g. Men shouldn't speak about their feelings or cry because that makes them weak and is worthy of mockery. Why is it considered to mock men and dismiss their emotional troubles and encourage them to bottle it up until they can't cope anymore? Because being emotional is associated with hysterical women. And there we come to the core: it's considered undesirable to be like a woman.

I am a woman, have been all of my life. From the day I was born “not another girl” as my grandfather pointed out, to this very day - “are there any jobs need doing in the house this afternoon” from my DH, I have been subjected to misogyny. Sometimes overt, some times unintentional. But always there.

I don’t agree with your comments about abortion mainly because you are holding woman to be predominantly responsible for preventing pregnancies. I agree that some women will be careless in taking the pill but I think there is a growing number of women who don’t want to take hormonal contraceptives anymore because of how it affects our bodies (in rare cases it can cause a stroke as it did to a friend in her 30’s recently). So condoms are really the answer but I can imagine there is a lot of pressure from men not to use them because “it doesn’t feel as good” and because they won’t have to directly deal with the consequences if a pregnancy occurs. Which is misogyny.

I agree with you op.
Another ridiculous notion is that men hate women, that one always makes me laugh.

That's nice for you, that it makes you laugh. I'm not sure the women in Iran killed for not covering their hair sufficiently find it that funny. Or the girls in Afganistan who can't go to school. Or the women in the Gulf states who need their sons permission to leave the house. Or the ones in Scotland that the government wanted to prevent from requesting a female medical examiner after being raped.

The NAMALT is strong with some posters here.

Do you want to talk about misogyny or about abortions?

We do live in a very misogynistic world.

As for abortions. If you see abortions as healthcare then you would understand why rates are high. Women and men are sexually active throughout a big chunk of their lives meaning a high chance of an unwanted pregnancy.

Yes a lot of (not all) pregnancies will be down to poor choices but then so are a lot of other things for which you'll need to access healthcare. Which are entirely preventable.

Tell you what?

As stated before I am not a man

Just a woman who understands the basic definitions of words before using them

Its very odd however you seem to not be able to scroll back and see where people have answered, lazy bugger

Another one giving examples of sexism

not misogyny

I don’t think one exists without the other.

@Millsbills no, the DH examples an ingrained prejudice against women. Also known as...?