Are you 'fatphobic'

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According to this definition it seems I am.

Aibu to think that actually that's completely reasonable?

Teen Vogue writer Catherine Mhloyi said: "In having the word 'fat' appear on the scale, she made a choice to explicitly name her demon, the fear of being called fat, which is fatphobia in its most literal sense."

news.sky.com/story/taylor-swift-video-for-anti-hero-edited-to-remove-the-word-fat-12731618

It sounds to me like the change made the video more interesting anyway. Instead of her fear being on the scale it shows her fear is her own disappointment. I think that's a more accurate representation of an ED.

Words change their meaning over time depending upon how they are being used.

There is absolutely nothing wrong on the surface with the word fat. However certainly through my 40 years on this earth, it hasn't been used simply as a descriptor.

It's used to bully, shame and intimidate. It's used to reduce a person's value and decimate their self esteem.

So fat would be an accurate description for many of us, it's been used and is still being used as a slur.

Some may describe themselves that way, and it may be used by healthcare professionals when talking with patients as a necessity, but many of us don't want to hear the word used to torment us used by slim people.

This is absolutely a thing. Just look at the shit Adele got when she lost weight.

I know there are some 'body positive' influencers on Insta who have made their weight their USP, and for some of them it is clear that they were happier when they were smaller and want to try and lose a bit of weight. But they are trapped because they don't want to 'let their followers down' by losing any weight. They won't even say the word excercise because it's 'too triggering', it's 'movement'. And if you look in the comments of these accounts, none of the young women who follow them seem happy, everything is triggering, everything is about them and how they feel and how what that influencer says makes them feel, everything is fatphobic.

It's so fucked up and is probably messing with young people's body image just as much as before tbh.

Why? Why the fuck would you even care? Why are you spending your time in a restaurant watching other people eat? So you go out for a nice meal and you are put off your food from watching another person eat?

That's just weird, get a grip.

That's fine, your nasty attitude probably makes quite a few people feel sick as well.

You need to discuss that in therapy. I just hope that you haven't verbalised that to your DD.

@Smilelesstalkmore I blocked quote a few. Thanks to me searching once for something and looking at 1, I was suddenly drowning in them.
Half of it is made up like other things on influencers' insta are.
Chin lipo, face lipo, smart video editing. The thing is that they make themselves look like they can run miles and do very harsh HIIT at size 30+ without breaking a sweat. That has two results. Half a people idolises them and second half feels bad that they look like them but can't make it up the stairs without huffing like a broken steam engine.

And yup. They are trapped and will be until end of their sadly shorter end of life

Imho it is exactly like unhealthily skinny influencers.

To somebody fat like me it's just absolutely heartbreaking to have to read this. I'm in tears now.

I'm fat. I wouldn't have minded the word on the scales in the video staying in. Taylor was making a point about how the industry makes you feel, and not making a point anywhere near saying that fat people are bad.

Why is everyone taking Sword's comment seriously? Let alone personally?

Taylor Swift was labelled fat by the media though. She has the right to make the point that even a tall healthy weight woman is still put under pressure to be thinn-er. It's her story, her feelings, she was labelled fat.
I'm surprised she backed down and changed it. It really resonated with me.

The idea that I could make somebody feel physically unwell just by existing, and them not knowing or caring anything about my many other good qualities. It makes me depressed. What's the point?

@RealBecca

You can talk about your body but why lie?

If you're not fat (and you must know you're not) why pretend you are?

Oh this is ridiculous
Lots of people have an inner critic that uses the worst insults to them "you bitch, you're disgusting, you are ugly, you are fat" etc and it exacerbates their mental health problems.
She's trying to personify that inner critic in the video. Of course the inner critic is fat phobic. Inner critics are by their nature horrible and "phobic" or racist, misogynist in all sorts of ways
It would be more useful to many people to discuss that openly than simplify it to "the video is fat phobic"

I love Taylor Swift and think she's really brave about how she talks about being female these days in her music.

Should also have said the inner critic is rarely right. So people can "feel" fat while not actually being fat.

I don't much like being called fat but I am. Perhaps I am fat phobic too! I have some fatter friends and think they wear their weight well though and am in no way afraid or ashamed of them for their bodies?

The point is that it's a stick to beat someone with, an obvious and visible apparent failing in someone that is socially sanctioned to use to humiliate someone else to make themselves feel good.

That's the only point to a comment like this, and unfortunately that's how some people work, instead of just being a decent person and seeking validation that way, they seek perceived failures in others, that they don't feel they have, to boost their own ego. The worst ones then dress it up as 'concern' for the NHS or even the person.

I'm fat, overweight, bigger, curvy - whatever you want to call it, but I'm also a decent person, I don't rate the opinion of someone who gets their validation from attempting devalue someone else.

Thank you for this @Maverickess , truly.

I agree but I think it’s a promotional tactic. Beyoncé and Lizzo both had good PR earlier this year from quickly editing a ‘difficult’ word or image out of a song/video. It gets HUGE coverage when artists do this. It’s PR.

@crumpetswithjam

Don't let it get to you.

At least you're not a dickhead. What ever size you are.

Usually I am like that @Maverickess but tbh I'm weak at the moment because I'm tired, and I read so much casual fatphobia on Mumsnet every day that real direct fatphobia just set me off.

This is 100% your problem, probably deeply rooted, and you should work to overcome it so you can be a better person.

I'm not pretending I'm fat or anything other than happy with how my body looks, pouch included. I'm worth more than whether my body is "perfect". I still want to fit into my size 10 jeans though.

Wanting to lose weight doesnt mean you have a body image issue or think you are fat. Sometimes it's just practicalities.

I would hate to be fat. It would be a fear of mine to become fat. I am a normal weight and by no means skinny, in fact I could do with losing half a stone. I am short so it shows. But honesty? Yes I would absolutely hate to be fat, described as fat, classed as fat and judged for being fat. So many people judge fat people. They think overeater, binger, Gorger, gluttony, greedy etc. I would hate to be on the receiving end of that.
If that makes me fatphobic. So be it.

It makes you a judgemental arsehole, which is worse than being a fatty tbh