Night out with friend "just come casual " then she comes dressed up...aibu to be annoyed?

[bradleyboo]

Last Saturday I had a night out with my friend.
The plan was to go into town for a few drinks.
She rang me and said "it's just casual,I'm gonna wear my big coat and boots"
So I dress down

Arrive and there she is dressed up
Skirt and bodysuit,heeled boots and no coat.
So I look like a scruff
I said "I thought it was casual"
She said "I changed my mind,dont be silly tho you look fine"

I'm still annoyed now
I felt horrible all night
We went in nice pubs (was meant to be just a spoons type pub)
I felt horrible

It sounds like a jealousy stunt. Does she often undermine you?

Bodysuits are awful. So you probably looked far nicer than she did anyway. I'm guessing you're prettier than she is, too.

All that aside, I absolutely CBA to care what a friend was wearing.

She's not your friend.

She did it on purpose.

She set you up. What, she changed her mind about the evening that dramatically, after specifically saying to dress down, and didn’t have a second to text you? “Hey OP btw I suddenly feel like going glam, so am dressing up after all…”

She’s not your friend OP, and not a nice person. She wanted the ego kick of looking like the ‘hot one’. I doubt she pulled it off she sounds like she went way ott and probably looked desperate for male attention.

She did it on purpose, probably because you’re naturally more attractive and she didn’t want you to get more male attention.

Definitely not a good friend!! I always check outfits before a day or night out with friends so we coordinate effort levels 😂 if my friend did this she'd be in trouble!

Hahaha. I had this before. It was a get together though, drinks, nibbles, group of friends. I asked what the dress code is and friend said oh I've just got leggings and a jumper on. Got there and she had faux leather leggings on and a slinky off the shoulder jumper on. I did call her out.

That's no friend. I used to have one of those who tried this stunt purely to make herself look better than whoever she was with.

100%! An absolute sold cold classic of a tactic.

Are you prettier/younger/slimmer than her?

So she’s not your friend. She purposefully made sure you looked less polished than she did in the hope she attracted more attention.

Probably is jealousy but I always wear what I want to wear. If my friend said it was casual I'd still wear what I wanted. Please yourself and wear whatever you look and feel best/ most comfortable in.

Agree probably deliberate.

I never bother checking what my friends are wearing though and I hate it when they want to know before hand so everyone looks the same. If I feel like dressing up I will but equally if I cba then I won’t.

At my age I’m confident enough to not care if I look different.

Frenemy

Wow, are women really like this to each other?

I had a "friend" like this a few years ago.
She is no longer a friend!

Def didn’t want you to get more attention than her - hate it when women do this to each other.

Totally set you up. Jealous you'd get more attention.

Sounds deliberately done op.

She’s not a friend. What a dick.

Clearly issues. However could you have said, 'I'm dressed for a crap pub, that's what we're doing.'?

I would rather be under than over dressed. I bet you looked great. I once invited a work colleague round to mine after work. She went home to change, I assumed into jeans, she turned up in a cocktail dress and 4” heels. We were going to a country pub for a pint and a takeaway curry?? 😳

My friend did this. Movie and girly night at hers, said to come wearing pjs and bring any nail varnish I had and snacks. Another friend was bringing face masks etc. I pick up face mask friend on the way - she’s also in pjs. We get there and movie friend answers the door wearing jeans and nice top. I say oh have you only just got in? Thinking she needed to change she said no, we’re all in here. We walk in and sat there is her husband, 3 of his friends and their GF’s who we’ve only ever met at their wedding. And she says, oh don’t mind them 2 they think they live here.
So we proceeded to act as if we lived there and put a movie on and Sat doing each others nails. The GF’s of her husband’s friends also joined us. She flounced off upstairs and finally came back down (after a 20min sulk) in her pjs 😂

I would genuinely never even ask what my mate was wearing if we were going to the pub. Unless you’re going somewhere really smart who cares? It’s much more embarrassing to be over rather than under dressed anyway, so don’t worry about it. She sounds like an idiot though.

This seems to be more of an issue with your self image, to me. Presumably you felt perfectly fine dressed casually at first. You only felt horrible when you saw her and that’s because you thought she looked better than you as she’d dressed up. However, that is a judgement based purely on clothing and isn’t something that should make you feel horrible about yourself at all. Is your self-confidence low or are you a bit hard on yourself at times?

Unless she did it maliciously and competitively, then the problem is more about you feeling crap when you are just being yourself. If she did do it on purpose, then you have a right to be annoyed.