AIBU to still be angry over how my husband buttoned his shirt at our wedding?

[Purplehair22]

I never addressed it with him. Well maybe only in a jokey way.
Long story short - at our wedding my husband got ready with the help of his parents.
for some reason his mum has an issue with doing up the top button (she says it makes men look like snobs) and as a result thought it would be acceptable to let him walk out looking like he’s just travelled here from the 70s. His collar was sticking out his blazer and wide open. Top 2 buttons were undone! I was so stressed I didn’t even realise until I saw the pictures!
I asked him about it the following morning in a jokey way and he said “well mum thought since I don’t have a tie it’ll look better that way”. I mean what???? I haven’t addressed it since coz I don’t want him to feel bad and I know I sound like an absolute f*cking psychoooo but every time I look at our wedding photos all I can see is that ABBA inspired collar!!!! Someone come whack me with a frying pan!

Oh please say there was a medallion...

I wasn't that keen on the suit DH and his best man picked. It was nothing offensive, just a bog standard grey suit jacket and trousers, but I thought the material was a tad shiny and looked a bit cheap. I didn't say anything because in the grand scheme of things it wasn't an issue. It was his choice and he liked it. And there was no fucking way he was having a say in what I was wearing so how would it be fair to pick over something trivial over his attire.
Your issue is clearly with in laws.

Also agree with PP, from what you've described a fully buttoned up shirt with no tie would have looked more bizarre!

Or he might even behave like an adult and make his own mind up about how he dresses. People get so worked up over the pettiest things!

I would love to hear that he hated your dress, and told you so!

This made me laugh out loud

Get someone to photoshop the pic that goes on the wall. Something like this would bug me too, I get it.

My major bug bear from my wedding was I paid extra money to have 2 photographers for the ceremony, one to get me walking in and 1 to get the shot of my husband seeing me for the first time (the thing I love about a wedding is the grooms face with that first glance). When I arrived his best man told him he wasn't meant to turn around when the bride walks in, so I walked down the aisle to the back of my husband's head and paid £500 for the pleasure of having a picture of the church and my husband's back. I was fuming!!! I asked him afterwards why the hell didn't you look at me, he said his mate told him he wasn't meant to 🤣🤣. We still laugh about it now, but I always say to him if he's the best man for anyone else, for godsake tell the groom to look at the poor girl that just spent 4 hours getting ready!!

I understand what you mean about the 70s shirt collar over the jacket —- it was not a good look. If he’d left the third button unfastened he could have added the medallion and had the full “medallion man” look.
I don’t get how you only realised when you saw the photos but if it really bothers you, get dressed up ( him properly this time) and get some new photos taken.

I don't know, a loose neckline is a bit more sexy in my opinion.
I'd feel a bit funny if my husband's mum thought it was sexy on my husband too though!
I'm sure she doesn't find your husband sexy.
Don't worry.

I voted that YANBU based on your description. Nobody would be impressed of their groom turned up to their wedding looking as disheveled as you described.

Sounds like he looked like a recruitment consultant down the pub at 3am.

We do need a pic, though.

You also need to stop blaming your MIL. He’s a grown man.

Was he wearing a tie, or not?

Divorce . Now . LTB . It's a deal breaker .

(It just get over it because in the great scheme of things it's a petty little non issue and you did t even notice on the day so can't have been that bad if no one was getting the platform boots out and star shaped sunglasses for. 70s themed wedding ?)

It does show his mother has a pretty strong influence on him which is not great for marriage

If he wasn't wearing a tie, I think it looks better unfastened.

Imagine giving shit like this headspace.

The wedding industry is tedious these days, and stuff like this is why.

I know I sound like an absolute fcking psychoooo*
er.....

Give me strength.

I've tried but I cannae.

Only read the thread title. YABU

I think it’s worse he wasn’t wearing a tie at his own wedding to be honest Hyacinth Bucket face

And yet you have enough head space to comment on it

So you were stressed about something else and you didn't notice what he looked like on your own wedding day until you saw photos?

Why would he wear his shirt buttoned and no tie like a year seven walking home from school with his Velcro tie in his pocket?

I'm thinking something like this?

How would you have felt if he didn't like the way your wedding dress looked?

That's assuming ops father had a similar influence on how his daughter dressed on her wedding day